Name: White Van Woman.
Age: It doesn't matter, so long as she's female.
Appearance: A smiling vision of practicality. Hard hat mandatory, visible bum crack optional.
Wait a minute, White Van Woman? What an ungainly phrase. Look, don't get caught up in semantics. We're talking about the rise of female tradespeople. According to a study of 10,000 workers, women now make up almost 6% of the UK's builders, plumbers and plasterers.
Is that a lot? Put it this way: female tradespeople now even outnumber migrant workers.
Really? It makes sense. The amount of women taking up DIY in recent years has been significant – between 2011 and 2012, for example, B&Q reported a 400% increase in the number of women enrolling in its skills workshops.
That's just a hobby, surely. No, they're making a living from it. The theory is that many women who lost their jobs during the last economic downturn set up their own building and plastering companies. There's even a magazine, Women In Trade, dedicated to reflecting the rapid growth.
I don't understand what the appeal is. The appeal of being a capable self-starter in a potentially very lucrative industry? No idea. It must be because they get to listen to Richard Keys on TalkSport on their way to jobs.
How will this affect the trade industry in general? Well, either Travis Perkins will start selling tile adhesive in a pleasant shade of fuchsia, or nothing will change at all you sexist idiot.
Is there actually a call for women in this line of work? You'd be surprised. When asked why they had set up their businesses, a lot of new female bosses said they were so disappointed by the poor customer service offered by male companies that they took the matter into their own hands.
Oh, so all of a sudden yelling "Make us a cup of tea, love," every 15 minutes isn't good customer service? Apparently not. It isn't explicitly stated in the report, but women are generally thought to be better at not yelling "WOY-OY!" out of windows at other women, too.
Good for them, then. White Van Woman is still a horrible phrase, though. It's better than Handy Mandys, though. Let's never call them that.
Do say: "How nice that one of the final gender-segregated professions in the world is becoming more diverse".
Don't say: "Free inside next month's issue of Women In Trade: some lovely mittens".
