Sex on stage is a notoriously tricky thing. A little goes a very long way. It is the suggestion of sexiness - not the act itself - that raises the temperature in an auditorium. That, and a sense of a chemistry between the actors getting it on. When Lucy Bailey's production of James M Cain's 1934 novel premiered at West Yorkshire Playhouse late last year, you felt as if you could see the steam rising from the stage as Charlotte Emmerson's Cora, unhappily married to Greek pit-stop owner Nick, and Patrick O'Kane's young drifter Frank, coupled violently on the floor of the roadside diner. The hunger and violence of it made you want to avert your eyes there was such a clear equation between sex and murder.
Now with O'Kane replaced for the London run with Hollywood star Val Kilmer, it is the theatrical equivalent of Horlicks. Quite simply he fails to give satisfaction. Not only is the chunky movie actor too old for the role but, despite the fact that he throws the furniture about and snarls at all the appropriate moments, he has all the stage presence of a damp tea towel. He might be useful to put out a small domestic fire, but he would be no help to a girl in starting one.
There are other problems with the transfer, not least the way that Bunny Christie's set has been squeezed on to the Playhouse stage like a meat pie with too much filling. Sit on the left of the auditorium and you can't see what is happening much of the time. The car crash remains as ridiculous as the sex.
The only real pleasure and satisfaction comes from Joe Alessi doing a brilliant double turn as the doomed Nick and the shifty lawyer, Katz.
· Booking until July 30. Box office: 0870 060 6631
