The Observer Christmas quiz: who said this in 2021?

British fish: happier post-Brexit? Photograph: Bloomberg/Getty Images

1. “You guys paid for all this!”

   1. Andy Burnham, on HS2’s northern link

   2. Elon Musk, on selling his Tesla shares

   3. Bill Gates, on the AstraZeneca vaccine

   4. Jeff Bezos, thanking Amazon employees and customers for on his trip to space

2. “You can’t beat a bit of Sweet Caroline, can you? That’s a belter, really.”

   1. Roy Keane

   2. Gareth Southgate

   3. Alan Partridge

   4. Neil Diamond

3. “I drank alcohol during quarantine. I was drinking seven nights a week and making pasta and eating bread. I went totally off the rails.”

   1. Deliciously Ella

   2. Rylan Clark-Neal

   3. Theresa May

   4. Gwyneth Paltrow

4. “They’re now British fish and they’re better and happier fish for it.”

   1. Nigel Farage

   2. Bob Mortimer

   3. Jacob Rees-Mogg

   4. Rick Stein

5. “I’ve probably made five really good films, out of 45 or 50.”

   1. Leonardo DiCaprio

   2. Kristen Stewart

   3. Matthew McConaughey

   4. Naomi Watts

6. “The problem with the wife who has known you since way before you were king of the world is that she sees through your facade.”

   1. Samantha Cameron

   2. Melania Trump

   3. Sarah Vine

   4. Marina Wheeler

7. “Britain has become a woke jail and we’re all behind bars.”

   1. John Cleese

   2. Laurence Fox

   3. Julia Hartley-Brewer

   4. Piers Corbyn

8. “I’m looking forward to being able to wear nail varnish and big earrings again.”

   1. Allegra Stratton

   2. Nancy Pelosi

   3. Angela Merkel

   4. Angela Merkel impersonator Ursula Wanecki

9. “Level up? You can’t even fill up!”

   1. David Lammy

   2. Jimmy Carr

   3. Munya Chawawa

   4. Keir Starmer

10. “I wish I’d never heard of Barnard Castle.”

    1. Boris Johnson

    2. Laura Kuenssberg

    3. Dominic Cummings

    4. Jonathan Van-Tam

11. “Women need to be streetwise about when they can and can’t be arrested.”

    1. Pussy Riot co-founder Nadya Tolokonnikova

    2. North Yorkshire police commissioner Philip Allott

    3. Patsy Stevenson, arrested at the Sarah Everard vigil

    4. US congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez

12. “I just love being in normal situations, man. It’s such a great feeling.”

    1. The Weeknd

    2. Madonna

    3. Justin Bieber

    4. YouTuber Logan Paul

13. “Ferraris, Maseratis, Nissan, Skylines, Proton Sagas: you name it, I drove it.”

    1. Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson

    2. Lewis Hamilton

    3. Janet Jackson

    4. Boris Johnson

14. “If I weren’t who I am today, I would have been a combat journalist.”

    1. Idles frontman Joe Talbot

    2. Cara Delevingne

    3. Dominic Raab

    4. Lady Gaga

15. “I started my very short go-karting career in a bus garage in Streatham before going to a proper track. From the age of nine, I started motocross in a forest.”

    1. Footballer Declan Rice

    2. BMX star Kye Whyte

    3. US Open winner Emma Raducanu

    4. Sprinter Dina Asher-Smith

16. “We moved on to reading Macbeth, which was a kind of foreplay routine we had.”

    1. Selling Sunset’s Christine Quinn

    2. Matt Hancock

    3. Cardi B

    4. Jennifer Arcuri

17. “Is this how our story is due to end?”

    1. David Attenborough

    2. Greta Thunberg

    3. Actor Brian Cox

    4. Scientist Brian Cox

18. “I’m a massive Biggie Smalls fan. It reminds me of my life in Swindon.”

    1. Mark Lamarr

    2. Heidi Alexander

    3. Billie Piper

    4. XTC’s Andy Partridge

Solutions

1:D, 2:B, 3:D, 4:C - On the post-Brexit fishing regime, 5:B, 6:C - Shortly before news of her divorce from Michael Gove was made public, 7:B, 8:D, 9:D - On the fuel crisis, 10:C, 11:B, 12:A - On the perils of fame, 13:D, 14:D, 15:C, 16:D - On her affair with Boris Johnson, 17:A, 18:C

Scores

1. 18 and above.

   From political gaffes to celebrity interviews, you’ve read it all. Congratulations! But perhaps it’s time to turn your phone off now.

2. 17 and above.

   From political gaffes to celebrity interviews, you’ve read it all. Congratulations! But perhaps it’s time to turn your phone off now.

3. 16 and above.

   From political gaffes to celebrity interviews, you’ve read it all. Congratulations! But perhaps it’s time to turn your phone off now.

4. 15 and above.

   From political gaffes to celebrity interviews, you’ve read it all. Congratulations! But perhaps it’s time to turn your phone off now.

5. 14 and above.

   All that doomscrolling paid off – you’ve kept up with most of the year’s big events while not being glued to your screen 100% of the time. Not bad.

6. 13 and above.

   All that doomscrolling paid off – you’ve kept up with most of the year’s big events while not being glued to your screen 100% of the time. Not bad.

7. 12 and above.

   All that doomscrolling paid off – you’ve kept up with most of the year’s big events while not being glued to your screen 100% of the time. Not bad.

8. 11 and above.

   All that doomscrolling paid off – you’ve kept up with most of the year’s big events while not being glued to your screen 100% of the time. Not bad.

9. 10 and above.

   All that doomscrolling paid off – you’ve kept up with most of the year’s big events while not being glued to your screen 100% of the time. Not bad.

10. 9 and above.

    Hmm. Perhaps if you hadn’t wasted all that time “mastering jiu-jitsu” or “writing your novel” this year you could have scored higher. Time to reconsider your priorities.

11. 8 and above.

    Hmm. Perhaps if you hadn’t wasted all that time “mastering jiu-jitsu” or “writing your novel” this year you could have scored higher. Time to reconsider your priorities.

12. 7 and above.

    Hmm. Perhaps if you hadn’t wasted all that time “mastering jiu-jitsu” or “writing your novel” this year you could have scored higher. Time to reconsider your priorities.

13. 6 and above.

    Hmm. Perhaps if you hadn’t wasted all that time “mastering jiu-jitsu” or “writing your novel” this year you could have scored higher. Time to reconsider your priorities.

14. 5 and above.

    Hmm. Perhaps if you hadn’t wasted all that time “mastering jiu-jitsu” or “writing your novel” this year you could have scored higher. Time to reconsider your priorities.

15. 4 and above.

    Oh dear. You haven’t really been keeping up, it would appear. But after the year we’ve had, who can blame you?

16. 3 and above.

    Oh dear. You haven’t really been keeping up, it would appear. But after the year we’ve had, who can blame you?

17. 2 and above.

    Oh dear. You haven’t really been keeping up, it would appear. But after the year we’ve had, who can blame you?

18. 0 and above.

    Oh dear. You haven’t really been keeping up, it would appear. But after the year we’ve had, who can blame you?

19. 1 and above.

    Oh dear. You haven’t really been keeping up, it would appear. But after the year we’ve had, who can blame you?