Get all your news in one place.
100’s of premium titles.
One app.
Start reading
The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Entertainment
Liam Williams

The new Phileas Fogg Crisps advert


Reading this on mobile? Click here to view

Two very boring-looking couples are relaxing in what looks like the kitchen from Outnumbered. One of the men has given the other a promotion, which calls for a celebration involving champagne and wives and what, to the untrained eye, appear to be crisps. The recently-promoted man says, "These are great crisps," which doesn't sound like something a human would say, but seconds earlier he'd called his boss "boss" so at least the thing's consistent, believability-wise. Next, boss's wife looks aggrieved and asks, "Did you just say the c-word?" She means crisps, but she's smuggled the actual c-word into your mind, for no real reason. Then, in the most horrid, reproving voice you've ever heard, says, "No, no, no, they're not crisps. They're [adopts a rubbish Deep South accent] Phileas Fogg Sweet Home Louisiana Flavour!" before turning into a cowgirl.

It's hard to criticise the last bit incisively because it's a lot to take in, but basically, it's a migraine-inducingly zany sequence involving hand puppets and people dancing in dinosaur costumes. It's as if someone at whichever ad agency 'made' this just rifled through a costume cupboard, grabbed the least moth-eaten items they could find, dumped the bundle on the floor and said to the actors, do summat with that, instead of devising a proper ending. If the 2004 adaptation of Around The World In 80 Days starring Jackie Chan and the guy who played Saxondale had Jules Verne turning in this grave, then this will have the Victorian penman revolving more determinedly than the paddlewheel of a steamship crossing the Atlantic.

Sign up to read this article
Read news from 100’s of titles, curated specifically for you.
Already a member? Sign in here
Related Stories
Top stories on inkl right now
One subscription that gives you access to news from hundreds of sites
Already a member? Sign in here
Our Picks
Fourteen days free
Download the app
One app. One membership.
100+ trusted global sources.