Martin Amis glowering at home. Photograph: David Levene
We all know that Shakespeare is master of the eloquent slander, but how about these fantastically lucid literary types who are alive, and very much kicking today? Modern writers are very capable of hurling their well crafted insults amongst each other with plenty of media on hand to appreciate, applaud and record the moment. But how well do they do within the confines of their fiction?
Used fittingly, a well-constructed slight can greatly enhance a tale, and loaded with the right combination of poison and detail it can conjure up an image that speaks volumes. Martin Amis is notoriously and fantastically unpleasant throughout his books; paternal influences most certainly being at play here. His father Kingsley can claim ownership to the delightful affronts "You bloody old towser-faced boot-faced totem pole on a crap reservation" and "You bloody little cowshed mountebank". Some slightly less putrid, yet equally offensive vitriol from the junior Amis has followed through the years. When asking after the whereabouts of his girlfriend Selina, Money's archetypal hedonist John Self receives the following answer from his very best friend; "I don't know, lying in a pile of cock somewhere."
In a more reactionary style, John Kennedy Toole's large and flatulent character Ignatious J. Reilly cries "perversion!", "abortion!" and "nazi female!" at those on the streets sporting outfits that he believes cause "egregious offence to human taste and decency". Carl Hiaasen's wizardry of the insult is undoubtedly my favourite; in his most recent novel, Nature Girl, one character is described as a "philandering shitweasel", while another is simply and effectively branded "a rectal ulcer".
When I ask for examples of modern literary scorn, I'm talking about the published stuff and not the ferocious ranting of the faceless blogosphere. Though, as Tim Jonze's recent investigative piece in the Guide beautifully illustrated, there certainly is some unrecognised talent out there.
