At 21, I was floating through life with few plans or aspirations. I had a part-time job at a sneaker shop in Sydney and spent most of my shifts gazing idly out the window.
In December 2011, a woman I’d never seen before wandered past. I was instantly drawn to this coolness she exuded, but as she walked on by I figured that was it, I’d never see her again. A few minutes later, she came back from the other direction and walked right in. Later, I’d learn she had noticed me too and had come back for a closer look, but at the time I was oblivious, far more worried about how I’d shoot my shot now she was right in front of me.
She was really friendly and asked about a very specific pair of shoes. We didn’t have her size and I knew we’d never stock them again, but I went through the motions of taking down her details anyway. There was definitely a little vibe, and as it turned out we were both using the same goofy tactics to maximise our exposure to each other. She had no interest in the shoes.
As we chatted, Sam told me she lived nearby and was opening her own shop just a few doors down. I felt like such a kid in the company of this sophisticated businesswoman.
A few weeks later, when her shop opened, I casually popped in to say hello. Before long I was dropping off coffees in the morning and wandering down on every cigarette break in the hope that if I just hung around enough something might happen.
On Christmas Eve she invited me over to her place. I can remember having to concoct some story to get out of dinner at my parent’s so I could spend the evening listening to music and polishing off a bottle of rum with a girl I was besotted with. We kissed that night, but much to my disappointment, I was quickly relegated to the friend zone. I sort of accepted that I would probably just have this crush forever or, if I was lucky, eventually my omnipresence would spark a romantic interest in her.
We saw each other virtually every day for six months and were texting and chatting on the phone constantly, but I still wasn’t getting any closer to making her fall in love with me. Then one day I was headed to work and noticed a sign on her shop saying it was closed due health reasons. I’d just run into Sam at an Aphex Twin concert the night before so I knew something was off.
There was a number on the note, so I texted it just to check if everything was OK. It turned out she’d been in a serious car wreck. The desperation I felt for her to be all right was overwhelming and it was in that moment I realised my feelings went well beyond a boyish infatuation.
It would be weeks before I heard from Sam and got the full picture. It turned out she had consumed a substance at the concert that wasn’t what she thought it was. The accident had happened as she tried to drive herself to safety in a panic. In my own way, I made it clear I had all the time and energy in the world to help her recover and over the next few months we slowly became a couple.
While Sam’s physical injuries were pretty serious, the psychological and judicial fallout from the accident was immense. It was a life-altering event for Sam and, by extension, me. The whole saga dragged on for more than five years.
As draining and full-on as it all was, it definitely brought us closer together and gave us a chance to see and feel the lengths we’d go to to support each other.
As the dark clouds of the accident began to disperse, we moved to Melbourne and started making music together. We took off to London in 2019, then moved on to Berlin where we’ve built our music careers and a family at the same time.
The feelings I had for Sam from that very first encounter were so pure and so deep it really felt fated. No one had ever made me feel more comfortable in myself. And I still feel exactly the same. Just being around her, no matter what is going on, always just feels right and safe. There’s no doubt she has brought out the best in me and made room for so many parts of me to grow and expand that might have otherwise lain dormant. To meet someone whose light shines on you in that way is out of this world.
Tom McAlister (Big Ever) and Samantha Poulter (Logic1000) are performing at Melbourne’s Now or Never festival, running 21-31 August 2025
