Stephinately the best
Sad to see chatty Priya go! We’ll tira-miss you. Wonder if lawless Henry will be wearing her bobby pins next week? Meanwhile Steph, a.k.a Iron Fringe, sits firmly on the throne for the third time.
Thanks to all y’all for the puns and opinions. See you next time for scouring pad sandwich week? Or whatever that was. In the meantime come say hi on braggysnaps or the angry place, or if you want to make me combust like a rum-stuffed bombe, buy my book!
Ciao x
Star Baker is Steph!
But sleek bobbed Priya must return to CBeebies. Love that Henry had already picked out what he was gonna nick. And Michael admits he was “flirting with the bottom.”
Take off the brooch! It’s cursed! (Obviously)
Not...Henry? He’s only just become a man this week. I want to see how he turns out.
Obsessed with Michael's beautiful and touching tribute to The Queen Mother #GBBO pic.twitter.com/Gcatr1Kade
— Amy Van Gar (@amyvangar) October 1, 2019
Priya to go? Steph for Prime Minister?
I would eat the heckins out of Henry’s cake. Judges unimpressed, however.
A LOT of rum, yup. Hic.” Go on ALice
Judging Time!
Steph is baking at a professional standard. Rosie’s bridesmaid’s dress of a cake looks like a Joel Schumaker Batman bombe, while Michael has made a “Queen’s mum’s hat” of a pudding.
LOL at these adverts saying ‘get ready for Brexit’ in calm, chirpy tones. YOU GET READY FOR BREXIT you mendacious incompetents.
Ooh, Steph has absolutely nailed that bombe. No handshake, but certainly in pole position.
I gather that we are all fans of drunken Alice, sweary Henry, and want to eat a bombe tout suite. I am very pleased that tiramisu is getting a kicking from you lot too because I find it an uncomfortably moist proposition.
Please someone GIF David and Henry spinning the turntable together, with Unchained Melody piped in over the top.
I like the close up shots of Michael’s freckles
I definitely want Steph to win. Definitely. Go Steph.” Does Steph possess incriminating footage of David, or have a sniper trained on him at all times? Is he in the same bind as Kevin Bacon? Intriguing development.
Henry appears to be nailing this. He set all his layers at once– which sounded like pie in the sky, but is actually honey mousse in a bowl.
Nothing like a turning out a cake to turn one’s stomach out with bake anxiety.
I’m actually most excited about Rosie’s flavours. But Steph looks like she’s in control. What do we think is going to go down?
Love the boy’s club! Henry, Michael and David discussing the setting temperature of gelatin. The only kind of stag do I can stomach. “I wish I cared,” cuts through Sandi.
David is making what looks like a spirulina smoothie, while Rosie is making a Hallmark sunset collage about puppies that love their mums or something?
WHAT is Henry doing? Cardboard discs? Simultaneous setting? Love has turned his head.
Steph is replacing sponge with a maverick mousse. She’s making a mirror-bombe that doesn’t shine? Is she a genius aiming at a target we can’t see, or has she pressed the self-destruct?
The chocolate....what’s it called? Mousse.” Very refreshing from Steph, in amongst all the jaconde this and bavarois that
Priya just said Chambord smells like Calpol. CAN WE FACT CHECK THIS.
Did she say her sponge was ‘fatless’ or ‘backless’?
Alice’s bombe sounds more alcoholic than happy hour. Definitely coming round to her.
Prue’s hair is like Cruella de Verrine
It’s Michael’s birthday as well? If we’d known, we would have baked a cake. Let’s give him star baker for the hell of it!
Showstopper: A…bomb?
Government keyword-tracking spyware must be going nuts right now
@Tallulahbankhead I am well jelly of your custardy wordplay
Judging Time!
David does excellently, Priya has plus de streusel. She comes in last with Michael, David is second and Alice takes it! KNEW IT. Everyone did very well, though.
Bakers fitting biscuit discs to glasses of identical diameter is filling me with anxiety.
Henry’s raspberry and cream shirt is vee nice, isn’t it. I want to wear that while eating Alice’s verrine. Did someone say they are dating? How lovely.
If the panna cotta isn’t set, the raspberry jelly will fall straight through it. But I bet a video of that happening in slow motion would be the most soothing thing ever.
I bet Alice knocks this outta the park. I have a feeling. I would want her to make my verrine terrine.
Steph strikes me as the kind of girl who secretly smokes and goes out on schoolnights but because her grades are good she never gets in trouble. A rare and very special breed.
Steph and Rosie haven’t made panna cotta? Even I have, many times. The ease to impressiveness ratio is unimpeachable.
Seriously where can I get these verrines from? I’m not making one.
Does Priya talk a lot? I’ve not really noticed that.
M&S are you listening? Look at this #sponcon. Please send puds.
Ooh, that DOES look tasty though. Like those little M&S puds you can get.
Technical Challenge: Verrines? Machines? Latrines?
Sounds like an anti-fungal foot powder
Henry’s gone with the artisanal Italian bread for his foot long. Also he is wearing a spiderweb brooch in homage to Helena!
How come I can’t take a mini pack of KP on a plane but Steph can make a nut meringue coated in nuts, served on a giant nut, with nut-sufferer Rosie right next to her? Open act of war.
Michael telling Paul what’s wrong with his own cake is painfully relatable.
Judging Time!
Looks at David’s beautiful effort. Like a Cezanne. Tastes like one too, apparently. Priya’s overbaked mauve cake is described as unappetising, which on behalf of Prince fans I find offensive. Alice’s cherry cake looks like the money shot in an episode of Dexter.
Thank you @StellaCoyle! Am feeling much better.
I agree with many of you, meringue is...an odd sensation in the mouth. Sickly polystyrene. The ghost of an egg getting married in Las Vegas.
Henry is making what looks like a foot long meatball Subway?
In the spirit of Kenneth Williams, I note that Rosie is struggling with her grainy ganache. There’s a cream for that etc
Bulbous #GBBO pic.twitter.com/4AvxQFVWXU
— Georgina Black (@GeorgeEBlack) October 1, 2019
Prue is working on her birthday! Happy birthday for several months ago, Prue!
Steph is doing an Eton Mess. Make your Brexit jokes…now!
There’s a wild-eyed proficiency to Alice I find very scary. I’m going to call her Gone Girl. Scone Girl?
You can tell dessert is kryptonite to David. A moment on the lips, an extra seven reps of high intensity training targeting core and hips. Look at him putting star anise in meringue.
You want to look at a meringue and think ‘Mmm, I want to eat that.”
-Paul Hollywood earning the metric tonne of gold bullion he’s paid per episode
Signature Challenge: Layered Meringue Cake
Me neck, me back, meringue and, ah, me cake
Michael is right, an Agatha Christie set in the tent would be bananas good. If this show was on ITV they’d have worked in some sort of murder element already.
“To lose one baker may be regarded as a misfortune; to lose both looks like carelessness.” Oscar Wilde. Yes, I’ve been convalescing with books of florid thespians.
I blame single mums.
Woah WOAH.
I’m away for one week and you somehow lose both Michelle, the best baker in the tent, and Helena, aka MY WIFE? What…what have you done to the place while I was away??
Was it Kenneth Tynan who said ‘If Peter O’ Toole was any prettier, it would be Florence of Arabia”? Magical stuff.
Ooh look lively, here we go.
Does anyone have any stupidly early predictions based on nothing?
Does Kevin Bacon do films anymore or is it just EE adverts? What exactly do they have on him?
To clarify: I’m not on commission with Baileys, and am livid about that.
What are we all eating and drinking for tonight’s entertainment? Feels like Baileys weather to me.
Welcome, to the party ID7160783!! Although writing this makes me feel like a Mos Eisley cantina bouncer who didn’t get the memo re: droids
Many thanks to Hannah for doing such a sterling job last week! Single mums don’t get enough recognition.
(Hannah isn’t a single mum, but that doesn’t invalidate my point.)
Thanks Snailywhaley & Brolene. I’m back! Took me a week and heavy machinery to hack off my face-briar. Had to call in the fire-briar-brigade. That was a close shave.
Hola my cherubim,
Welcome to the only Great British Bake Off live blog that is never made from concentrate. Each week I write up the episode’s highs and lows in real time, while everyone else is free to get involved in the comments.
Tonight, it’s dessert week. But which baker has muffin to lose, and who mousse pack their bags? If you’re allergic to puns, this may not be the blog for you.
Everyone else, I’ll see you here at 8pm!
