It has, however, been lovely to be writing the liveblog again, mostly due to the wit, wisdom and enthusiasm of everyone who has taken the time to join in with the comments - thank you for being amazing. And whilst I’m hanging up my Bake Off apron for another year, I’ll be liveblogging Strictly every weekend until Christmas, so feel free to swing by on Saturday and Sunday nights. You can also find me on Twitter @heidistephens, so please come and say hello. Keep baking! Hx
So that’s it for another series of Bake Off, bear with me for a moment while I have a small rant.
It hasn’t been my favourite series this year, mostly due to Channel 4 ramping up the tension with challenges that are too complex and don’t give our bakers enough time to do well. From the start we all agreed that this year’s batch of amateur bakers had real talent, and for me the joy of Bake Off is in seeing them succeed, and sitting on my sofa thinking “I could try making that”. Of course the odd mishap is always fun, but there’s very little enjoyment in seeing people become stressed, exhausted and crying because they have been set up to fail. And for the first time since I started watching the show, there really hasn’t been anything I’ve fancied trying at home. Bake Off is supposed to be a gentle, charming baking show, not a gruelling reality gameshow – please, Channel 4 and Love Productions, give us back the GBBO we’ve always loved next year.
Rahul rings his mum and tells her he’s won. She talks more than he does, and sounds thrilled for him. Bless him, he should be incredibly proud of how far he has come.
Time to get an update on our bakers! Ruby, Manon and Antony have been drinking together in London, which is a party I definitely want an invite to.
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And the winner of this year’s Great British Bake Off is...RAHUL.
He smiles the biggest smile a man ever smiled - DRINK DRINK DRINK. Well done Rahul, you nailed it in the final challenge when it really mattered.
“I talk so much, most of the time. But I don’t know what to say now”, says Rahul. It’s not exactly Nadiya’s speech from Season 6, but OK.
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Time to find out who the winner of this year’s Great British Bake Off is. Kim-Joy was in the lead before the Showstopper, but she played it too safe. Ruby has been consistent, but Rahul nailed the flavours. Who will win it? The judges need to look at all three bakes together and make a decision.
I have no idea which way this is going to go.
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So who will win? I think it’s probably going to be Rahul, based on the final challenge - his flavours were definitely the best. But it could be Kim-Joy. Or Ruby. Nothing makes sense any more.
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Kim-Joy’s Showstopper is the nicest looking of the three, but I’m still not sure spray algae makes me want to eat any of it. It’s also falls a bit flat for Paul and Prue on variety and flavours.
Could we not just have asked them to make a beautifully decorated wedding cake? Would that have been too much to ask?
Rahul’s Showstopper has a million things going on, and has some nice height. It also looks a bit sludgy, and not very appetising. The stepping stones are delicious, and the choux buns also get a thumbs up. Good flavours all round - has he done enough to win?
All the families have arrived and are enjoying the sunshine. What a lovely summer it was, I miss it.
Judgement time! Ruby’s magical landscape looks more like a swamp made from cardboard and plasticine, but the flavours are lovely. Her caramel is overcooked, however.
Everyone has started running about and burning themselves, they only have five minutes left. Kim-Joy’s treasure chest is seeping, and Rahul is piping gravity-defying cacti.
Time’s up for Ruby and Kim-Joy, but Rahul still has another fifteen minutes. He’s using it to mumble a running commentary of all the things he should be doing right now, but isn’t. Time’s up!
Right now these look like the ugliest final showstoppers we’ve ever seen, but maybe we need a closer inspection.
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Rahul has lost control of his choux timings, and is willing them not to collapse. Let go of the things you cannot control, Rahul.
Meanwhile Kim-Joy is already airbrushing mould onto the her ruined city, and making bright blue coral out of something that looks toxic.
Kim-Joy has started to build her Lost City of Atlantis. Noel describes her as “whimsical” and Ruby as “stroppy”. He asks Rahul how he would describe himself, and he says “depressing”. At least he’s self-aware.
Rahul has been given an extra 15 minutes to cover the time he lost, which is fair. He seems to have lost his way, however, and his apron looks like he’s been butchering pigs.
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What would you make for this challenge? I think I’d have to make the Cotswolds out of madeira sponge and green fondant, with drystone walls made out of nut brittle and tiny gingerbread cottages.
My version would of course look like a post-apocalyptic abandoned village, but the intent would be there.
Ruby is making a magical landscape of choux mountain and shortbread hills. It also includes unicorns and mushrooms, which is definitely Kim-Joy territory.
Kim-Joy is making the Lost City of Atlantis, with a salted caramel well. Rahul is making a rock garden with choux rocks and ginger stepping stones. It has 200 individual items, WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG.
OH. One of Rahul’s glass storage jars has exploded in the heat, so everything is going to have to be thrown out in case it contains glass. This is a disaster for Rahul, he has to start again.
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OK, we’re back in the room. It’s time for the final, final challenge – an incredible landscape dessert showstopper. No big deal, just give me Lake Windermere made out of biscuits and Swiss meringue.
Time for judging - Rahul’s pitta is a burnt flatbread. “It’s very charred”, says Prue. It was cooked on an OPEN FIRE, what more do you want?
Kim-Joy’s are also burned but they have a vague pocket. Ruby’s pittas are too thick, but her dips are nice.
Ruby comes third, Rahul second and Kim-Joy first. So KIM-JOY is in pole position going into the Showstopper.
Everything about that challenge has made me furious. Will spend the ad break taking deep breaths.
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The bakers need to heat their campfire slates to the right temperature, but nobody has told them what that temperature is. And even if they did know, the bakers would have no way of measuring it.
This challenge is stupid.
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Rahul doesn’t like baba ganoush. Have we established at any time what Rahul DOES like? Kittens? Formula One? Craig David?
Who MAKES pitta breads? They cost about 80p for six, taste of nothing and they’re just a carrier for better things. Why bother making your own?
None of them have a clue what they’re doing. Rahul asks for help, and doesn’t get any. He is in meltdown.
So hot stone baking, basically - their pitta breads must have a nice pocket, which means not letting the stone get too hot.
They also need to make three dips - babaganoush, salsa verde and burnt pepper.
Time for the Technical Challenge, and it’s OUTDOORS. Rahul is already moaning that his tray is heavy.
Their final challenge is to make six pitta breads on an open fire, with three different dips. They have 90 minutes. OK, but why?
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Ruby’s decoration is good, but there’s a bit of dripping around her ring (LEAVE IT). The filled ones are underfilled and boring, alas.
Rahul’s doughnuts are somewhat overdecorated, and his ring doughnuts are dark, oily and tight. Paul’s not keen on the buttercream, but the mango filling is nice.
ROUND ONE TO KIM-JOY.
Judging time! Kim-Joy’s doughnuts are not uniform enough for Paul’s liking, but they have a nice shape and lovely decoration. The ring ones have a good lemony flavour too.
Kim-Joy’s filled doughnut are almond liqueur happiness. Want.
One minute left! Rahul is mumbling an endless stream of negativity despite nothing actually appearing to be wrong, other than his doughnuts being roughly the size of a baby’s head.
Wherever his career takes him after Bake Off, I’m not anticipating much work as a motivational speaker.
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One hour left! Time to fry their doughnuts, but the oil must be the perfect temperature. I don’t own a deep fat fryer, I cook mine in a big saucepan and run the risk of burning the house down.
Ruby’s swear word of choice - “sugar puff”. Her doughnuts are misshapen so she’s trimming them with scissors. She can’t remember which ones she’s filled.
Drama! Rahul has had a mango explosion.
Kim-Joy is already making miniscule birds and bees (DRINK) to decorate her doughnuts. Her baking is a work of art, I hope tonight’s showstopper lets her shine.
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Kim-Joy is adding almond liqueur, because she loves cooking with alcohol. So many reasons why I love Kim-Joy.
The Sheffield family who have taken Rahul in are lovely. “I think my life would be a lot poorer if I hadn’t met Rahul”. Is there anything nicer anyone could say?
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I can’t handle the proud weeping parents. Bit dusty in here.
Kim-Joy is making a lemon dough for both her doughnuts, but Ruby is making two different ones. She’s done lots of of practising, which is always a good sign. Those dulce de leche ones look yummy.
First up - the final Signature Challenge! It’s two batches of six iced doughnuts - one iced, and one ring. I love making (and eating) doughnuts, they’re lush.
Rahul has never eaten a doughnut in his life. Can someone take him to Krispy Kreme? It will BLOW HIS MIND.
He’s putting buttercream on his doughnuts. Oh dear. If there’s one place buttercream does not belong, it’s on a doughnut.
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Rahul is very nervous, and never expected to get this far. He started well, and has had the most handshakes of the series (and the most shaky hands).
Kim-Joy is queen of whimsy and artistry, but some of her bakes have been entirely inedible.
Ruby nearly got kicked out in Week 1, and has more than her fair share of disasters. But she’s also been Star Baker for the past two weeks - can she hold on for a third?
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And we’re off! Previously on Bake Off: 9 weeks of high pressure melty bakes. And now there are only three bakers left, and it’s FINAL TIME!
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While we’re waiting, Tamal’s latest recipe for Tahini and Date Brioche looks like heaven. And his apple and blackberry cake from a couple of weeks ago looks even better, might give that a whirl this weekend.
For the final time, let’s have a game of Bake Off Bingo – a swing of something celebratory for any occurrence of the following:
- Rahul smiling
- Kim-Joy making woodland creatures
- Ruby getting snarky with Paul
- A Hollywood handshake
- Crying
Welcome!
Hello, and welcome to the Great British Bake Off GRAND FINAL liveblog! Tonight Ruby, Kim-Joy and Rahul will go all-out to impress Prue and Paul one final time, in the hope of taking home the coveted Bake Off title, a glass cake stand, and the admiration of a nation of cake lovers.
So who will it be? It’s quite hard to call at this stage – all three of this year’s finalists have won Star Baker twice, so everything’s equal on paper. Ruby is undoubtedly the coolest under pressure, but the quality of her bakes has been inconsistent. Kim-Joy is the most creative and artistic baker in the tent, but is less confident with the non-whimsical basics. Rahul is good with flavours and has somehow made it the final despite having no confidence whatsoever, so I wouldn’t be surprised if he managed a final push this evening.
In the end it’s going to come down to who can hold their nerve and rise to the occasion for tonight’s final three challenges. The show kicks off at 8pm, so join me then for the final liveblog. See you then!
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