The Gallery: Luis Suárez

That didn't take long. Justin Maddox gets the inevitable vampire entry in early: 'Now Suárez and Bakkal can be together forever' Photograph: Photomontage

And look, here's another one. 'Kenny Dalglish devises a novel way to add bite to Liverpool's attack,' parps Philip Jones Photograph: Photomontage

Suárez kindly takes David de Gea through some basics of shot stopping in Brian Quinn's offering Photograph: Photomontage

'He starts off looking like a bumbling fool, but turns out to be quite handy after all,' reports Columbo fan Alun Hewinson Photograph: Photomontage

'Odd how you never see Suárez and Freddy Mercury in the same place at the same time,' muses Ben Parry, while singing Bohemian Rhapsody Photograph: Photomontage

Here's puppetmaster Sam Gold: 'Can Kenny work his magic and turn Suárez into Keegan circa 1973?' Photograph: Photomontage

'A Liverpool legend in the making,' declares the bizarrely-named A Feint Zebra Photograph: Photomontage

Confused? Then here's Chris Reilly's explanation: 'Suárez realises he's joined an elite band of players who have no hope of winning the league' Photograph: Photomontage

It's quiz time, courtesy of Bert Ayers: 'Which is the odd one out?' Photograph: Photomontage

Steve Fuller frightens the bejesus out of us with his behind-the-scenes tour of Liverpool's dressing room Photograph: Photomontage

'Is he the one?' Matrixes Andrew Booth Photograph: Photomontage

'A sloth he ain't, but he sure as hell looks like one,' sniggers Jason Froggett Photograph: Photomontage

Michael Maddox performs major surgery on our protagonist to help him avoid another Ghana controversy Photograph: Photomontage

Andrew Smith rounds things off by presenting Anfield's latest double act, Lu and Andy Photograph: Photomontage