The Gallery: Chelsea's new manager

'What's that Sooty? You're very happy with the players we have brought in? You think you can easily crowbar them into the tactics you have now? Oh that's good!' smirks Valentino Photograph: Photomontage

'They're my wives now!' hello Daves Darren Carroll Photograph: Photomontage

'Where's the next Wally?' Tim Hill has his eyes peeled Photograph: Photomontage

'Abramovich adds a new toy to his collection,' guffaws Wuggy Lemass, who has put some impressive work into creating that Guus doll Photograph: Photomontage

'I always thought they made a nice couple,' says Ozu Mizoguchi dreamily Photograph: Photomontage

Dastan Salehi riffs on the Roman Empire Photograph: Photomontage

'After repeated failures by his managers, Roman goes for the direct approach to finally get his hands on the European Cup,' titters Steve Fuller Photograph: Photomontage

'Roman nears completion of Avram 2.0 with new ultra compliance chip,' reckons Russ Gable Photograph: Photomontage

'Roman was just trying to fit into the local history of the area in his search for yet another manager.' Alan Noon has got the Chelsea owner confused with Henry VIII Photograph: Photomontage

'Has Abramovich gone A Bridge Too Far?' asks Joby Spragg Photograph: Photomontage

'I think that by this time next year Roman, I could make you a millionaire.' Allan Heywood serves up The Gallery's now ubiquitous Only Fools And Horses picture Photograph: Photomontage

'Roman tells his friend Guus who he wants as the next Chelsea manager,’ smiles Steve Fuller Photograph: Photomontage

'I knew he was desperate but this is a new low!' hollers Lenny DeValera Photograph: Photomontage

'They say money can’t buy you love but it can buy you a pretty good second place.' David Ellis takes a wild leap of the imagination. Photograph: Photomontage

'Ancelotti will never make it as the head of a major club.' Laura Ramirez is back on the Roman Empire theme Photograph: Photomontage

If this is the way Roman Abramovich goes about things, Alan Sugar's TV role is safe for a while, chortles James Croft ... Photograph: Photomontage

... or is it? Tracey Read puts the Chelsea owner in Suralan's chair. 'With Abramovich at the helm of the new series of The Apprentice, a week hadn't passed and all 16 applicants had been fired!' Photograph: Photomontage

'It’s Christmas!' Roman's on a turkey hunt in Paul Berry's entry Photograph: Photomontage

'If he only had a heart ...' Jason Froggett goes straight to the point. Photograph: Photomontage

'Abramovich ushers in a new era of recycling at Stamford Bridge.' Alun Hewinson's Frankenstein's monster of Chelsea managers is a disturbing sight. Photograph: Photomontage