The funniest joke I’ve ever heard
I think that the brilliant Gary Delaney has loads of great jokes, and I would watch him all day, every day – so here’s one of his: when my girlfriend suggested we try playing doctors and nurses I was really hoping for something sexier than being left in a corridor for two days.
The funniest standup I’ve ever seen
The first time I saw Mike Wilmot I was doing the newbie spot at a gig he was closing. I thought I’d done quite well, then watched him come on and absolutely take the roof off. He was riffing, doing material, commenting on how it was going, and everything was making me laugh so much so that I was willing him to stop talking so that I could catch my breath. I really felt like I had been taught a valuable lesson – I was rubbish.
The funniest hairstyle I’ve ever had
I went through a phase as a teenager of waxing my hair into Darth Maul style spikes. It was ridiculous, and occasionally I would use a wax that wasn’t strong enough, and the spikes would droop as the day went on. It also ruined my hair so much that I had to shave my head.
The funniest book I’ve ever read
I read How To Be A Superhero by Mark Leigh and Mike Lepine when I was a teenager and I thought it was hilarious. It brilliantly spoofs the superhero genre, and with superhero films being the only movies that are legally allowed to be made now, I imagine somebody somewhere is discussing a re-release this very second.
The funniest heckle I’ve ever had
I was doing a bit of material about married men needing a service where people listen to their inane conversation, and a woman in the audience said: “Looks like you’ve found yours.” That was better than anything I said in my set.
The funniest thing that shouldn’t be funny
When our dad passed away, I became conscious that my crying sounded really weird. A few months later my brother confirmed that everybody in the family secretly thought that. His impression of me crying is very funny. He only does it when I ask him to; he doesn’t taunt me with it.
Romesh is touring to the end of the year; see romeshranganathan.co.uk for further details
