Welcome to the inaugural Football Daily Premier League Awards, a celebration of a dramatic, eventful 2024-25 season and definitely not an attempt to get half the Football Daily Christmas Awards done early so that we can get lost in eggnog a few days earlier in December. Enjoy!
The Fauja Singh Award For Finding A New Interest In Your Dotage
Meet Mo Salah 2.0, a once single-minded forward who now loves creating goals almost as much as scoring them. Salah’s dual threat made him the best player in the league by a mile, though we’re a bit worried about Sadio Mané’s cognitive dissonance.
The Gus Poyet Award For Giving In To Roy Keane At Old Trafford
Sky’s Kelly Cates for her deadpan reference to Roy Keane’s cardigan during Chelsea’s visit to Old Trafford. “Olivia Rodrigo is watching on from the stands and we’ve got Cardi B in the studio as well!” Even Keane, whose instinct in such situations is to activate the death stare, saw the funny side.
The Arthur Herbert Fonzarelli Award For Jumping The Shark
After five years of therapy working exclusively on this issue, Football Daily thought it had made peace with the fact that everyone in the Premier League has a busted moral compass that points exclusively in the direction of their self-interest. Then, on Sunday, Ashley Young gave Anthony Gordon an extended lecture about diving, and we’re back on the couch first thing tomorrow morning.
The Bukayo Saka Award For Sheer Likability
For one season only, Saka will have to share the award with Crystal Palace’s Jean-Philippe Mateta. He runs himself into the ground every game, he gives interviews full of personality and playfulness, he hijacks interviews with Eberechi Eze to shout “HE’S THE MAN” repeatedly; and, like Saka, he scores goal-of-the-season contenders at the Emirates. Mateta and Eze symbolise possibly the most likable team in the league.
The 5am Club Award For Finishing Early
Brentford, who made history by scoring inside the first minute of three consecutive Premier League games in September. Reality bit thereafter; in their next league game, Nathan Collins didn’t give them the lead until the 76th second.
The Dennis Bergkamp Award For Wearing Boots Made Of Velvet And Velcro
Kaoru Mitoma. His droolicious goal against Chelsea began with a first touch from the heavens as the ball dropped over his shoulder; the other touches were adequate as well. We could write 8,000 words on it but you’re better off just watching it. And watching it. And watching it some more until you realise it’s 4.49am tomorrow morning and you need to be up in 11 minutes.
The Wayne Rooney Remember The Name Award
Myles Lewis-Skelly made history at the Etihad in September when he was booked before making his Premier League debut. That came a few minutes later, whereupon a borderline feral Erling Haaland impolitely enquired as to his identity. It’s increasingly hard to remember a time when we didn’t know all about Lewis-Skelly, who went from benchwarmer to England’s first-choice left-back in record time. When he scored in Arsenal’s 5-1 win over City in February, he celebrated by copying Haaland’s tranquil, cross-legged celebration. We’d imagine there was nothing particularly meditative about Haaland’s internal monologue when he clocked Lewis-Skelly’s pose.
The Steven Gerrard Award For Raising The Roof
James Tarkowski, who bulldozed an injury-time equaliser for Everton in the last Merseyside derby at Goodison Park. If there was a louder noise all season, we didn’t hear it.
The Generic Litter Of Puppies Award For Making The World A Better Place
In an omnishambles of a season at Old Trafford, there was one beacon of hope. Amad Diallo plays football with the freedom and joy that most of us leave behind in the playground, and what Premier League highlights United usually had involved him: a 13-minute hat-trick against Southampton, an equaliser at Anfield and a euphoric last-minute winner in the Manchester derby.
This is an extract from our daily football email … Football Daily. To get the full version, just visit this page and follow the instructions.
