After the sixth rate rise in as many meetings, a reserved banker said, “We have to stop meetings like this.
“We congratulate all Australians who followed our advice and saved money during COVID. Now, please blow it on your mortgage.”
Reserve Bank Governor Philip Lowe’s salary is $911,728. But don’t worry. He’ll be OK.
Some blame Australia’s unpredictable job market. The solution? Fewer unpredictable jobs.
You Musk be joking
Celebrity squillionaire Elon Musk has urged Ukraine to give up land claimed by Russia.
This surrender will be a negotiated peace without the negotiation but, for many Ukrainians, eternal peace.
Such comments are normally reserved for speeches by coked-up Logie winners and that guy chasing squirrels in the park.
Putin was delighted by Musk’s support and has offered Musk, “many monkeys for his rocket ships.”
Musk said surrender will avoid a lengthy war. Putin did not promise a lengthy peace.
Man who lost AFL job over church’s anti-LGBT+ beliefs slams intolerance
Andrew Thorburn is the chairman of a church that states gay sex is a “sin”.
House prices disastrously dropping to affordable
Monarchy see, monarchy do
Prince Charles defended his actions declaring, “As far as climate is concerned, ‘mum’s the word’ and Mum never said a word.”
Heavy lies the head that wears his mother’s hat.
In other news …
“IRAN’S MORALITY POLICE” EASIER TO SAY THAN “DICKLESS, SADISTIC MURDERERS”
100 ABC JOURNOS STAYING IN LONDON AFTER QUEEN’S FUNERAL TO AWAIT CHARLES’ FUNERAL
CASINO MYSTIFIED AT BEING FOUND FIT TO HOLD LICENCE
VEGETARIAN POET DECLARED MAN OF LETTUCE
NBN DUMPS FIBRE-TO-THE-NODE, LAUNCHES STRING-TO-THE-MILO-TIN