The Expendables: Rage is all the rage at the LA premiere

First rule of combat: remove shades beforehand. Mickey Rourke has done this before Photograph: Chris Pizzello/AP

Second rule: disarm your opponent by slipping them back on and giggling Photograph: PHIL McCARTEN/REUTERS

Rule three: be careful not to enrage your foe with excessive flippancy. Rebecca – wife of Terry – Crews gets reckless Photograph: Chris Pizzello/AP

Eric Roberts grins impotently as stepson Keaton Simon moves in to throttle. His life is flashing before his eyes Photograph: Chris Pizzello/AP

Bruce Willis effortlessly conceals his agony as daughter Rumer and wife Emma simultaneously knee him in the groin Photograph: PHIL McCARTEN/REUTERS

Sylvester Stallone desperately gestures to a photographer for help as eldest daughter Sophia pincers him in an arm-lock while simultaneously squeezing the breath from her mother Photograph: PHIL McCARTEN/REUTERS

Steve Austin stares into the middle distance as a mystery fist prepares to batter him. Two seconds later, he was dead Photograph: Chris Pizzello/AP

And who did that fist belong to? Dolph Lundgren can't conceal his glee Photograph: Benkey/UK Press