If you need a break from the all-consuming golf here at Royal Birkdale, a little trip to the British Lawnmower museum in Southport is always worthwhile.
Wonderfully jam-packed with grass-cutting antiquities, trail-blazing trimmers and gardening artefacts of the rich and famous, this delightfully niche gem retains a charming character not often seen in these modern times. It’s a bit like the diarist.
Did you ever wonder, for instance, what type of machinery Eric Morecambe used to titivate his turf? Well, wonder no more because it’s displayed in this delightfully unassuming haven.
All this jolly, lawn-related reverence got the diarist thinking of the old Ronnie Corbett yarn about his wife mixing up the grass seed with the bird seed. “We had to mow the budgerigar twice a week,” chuckled wee Ron.
*Oh, the culture and that. After another day of tireless endeavour at The Open – “don’t make me laugh,” spluttered the sports editor – the diarist had a stroll to Crosby beach to see Anthony Gormley’s famous artistic installation.
‘Another Place’ consists of 100 cast iron figures, modelled on Gormley’s own naked body, facing out to sea.
Funnily enough, they reminded the diarist of a few golf writing colleagues as they stood in silent, sombre reflection while waiting on the media shuttle bus.
They weren’t in the scuddy, mind you. Some of them might be if this heatwave continues.
*The Open heid bummers are always trying to find new ways to give the fans more bang for their buck.
The week began, for instance, with a Last Chance Qualifier, a new, 12-man shoot-out over 18-holes with one place in the championship up for grabs.
England’s Joe Dean was the winner of this Last Chance Qualifier. As for the diarist? “You’re in the last chance saloon with this tripe,” growled a scunnered sports editor.
