Get all your news in one place.
100’s of premium titles.
One app.
Start reading
Daily Record
Daily Record
Sport
Mark Pirie

The best Bertie Auld jokes as Celtic legend cuts referee 'Tiny' Wharton down to size and makes derby bonus guarantee

Bertie Auld had one of the biggest personalities in the Scottish game.

Aside from his achievements on the pitch with Celtic and earning legendary status with a European Cup final victory in Lisbon, his sense of humour won over the hearts of fans.

The always-smiling icon wasn't shy about dropping a one liner, and there are countless stories over the years of his top class banter.

After a trophy-laden career both as a player and manager during spells at Hibs, Birmingham City, Hamilton, Partick Thistle and with his beloved Hoops, Auld will always be remembered by fans after his passing aged 83.

Record Sport takes a look back at some of his best quips that also added to the folklore around the Lisbon Lion.

After signing for Celtic

Auld remembers his mother giving him a “treat” after being handed his first full-time contract by then Parkhead boss Jimmy McGrory – he was allowed to choose which side of the bed he would sleep on.

He wrote in his autobiography: “Well, one of my brothers had a wee bit of a problem holding his water sometimes.

“So I immediately said, ‘I’ll take the shallow end!’”

On beating Inter Milan with a sing song

(SNS Group)

"The referee was holding us back and Jimmy (Johnstone) said, 'look Bertie, they are like film stars'. I said, 'I know, but can they play?'

"They were looking over because we were all gallus, laughing and joking and hitting each other's shoulders.

"The next bit was just natural (singing) because if you can do it at Firhill why not do it in Lisbon?'

*sings 'It's a grand old team to play for'*

"And the rest is history. We beat them in the tunnel, and then we beat them on the park."

Ahead of derby day

When speaking to Rangers captain John Greig in the tunnel before the clash of the Glasgow giants, Auld remembers being asked: "How much bonus you on today?"

He replied: "£5, how about you?".

Greig quipped back: "Is that all? I'm on £10."

But Auld had the final say with: "Yes, but I am guaranteed £5."

When dealing with referees

Bertie to legendary official Tom 'Tiny' Wharton: “If I call you an a******* Mr Wharton will I get booked?

Wharton: “Yes, Mr Auld. You’d be in trouble.”

Bertie: “What if I just thought you were an a*******, what would happen?”

Wharton: “If you just thought it, nothing would happen.”

Bertie: “Well, Mr Wharton, I think you’re an a*******.”

When being compared to Rangers

(L-R) Billy McNeill, Bertie, Tommy Gemmell, and Bobby Murdoch after a game against Fiorentina in 1970 (Daily Record)

On being asked how the 1990’s Rangers team that went on to win Nine In A Row would fair if they were to play a match against the Lions.

Auld replied: “If I’m honest I think it would be a draw, but to be fair most of us are in our sixties!”

Sign up to read this article
Read news from 100’s of titles, curated specifically for you.
Already a member? Sign in here
Related Stories
Top stories on inkl right now
One subscription that gives you access to news from hundreds of sites
Already a member? Sign in here
Our Picks
Fourteen days free
Download the app
One app. One membership.
100+ trusted global sources.