Laura Loomer is, entirely predictably, having a completely over-the-top reaction to last night’s shooting of two West Virginia National Guard troops just north of the White House in Washington DC. The two men survived the attack and are in critical condition.
The Department of Homeland Security has identified Rahmanullah Lakanwal as the suspect, an Afghan national who entered the United States legally under the Operation Allies Welcome program designed to support Afghans who aided US troops in their country. Lakanwal was then granted asylum earlier this year under the Trump administration.
Without wanting to diminish the seriousness of this attack, the Trump administration has been fully prepared for something like this to happen. A combination of highly controversial and visible troops on city streets combined with widespread gun ownership, made this kind of attack a matter of “when” not “if”.
But Loomer has gone completely off the rails, frothing at the mouth as she sees this unfortunate incident as the reason to spit on everything the Founding Fathers stood for and shred the U.S. Constitution. Her first reaction was bloodlust:
Very sad. The day before Thanksgiving.
— Laura Loomer (@LauraLoomer) November 26, 2025
I hope the killer is tortured on live television and then given the death penalty via firing squad. https://t.co/RQAeTEhJ6U
Then, moments later, Loomer said it’s time for the coronation of King Trump I:
That’s it.
— Laura Loomer (@LauraLoomer) November 26, 2025
I want a King.
Crazy as a Loomer
It’s unclear what’s going through her addled brain right now. Even leaving aside that Loomer is in the wrong country if she wants to be ruled over by an unaccountable monarch (I dunno, try Swaziland or something), how would Trump being King Trump have affected this incident?
In her bizarre imaginary world, where America belatedly decides that, actually, the whole American Revolution thing was a bad idea after all, and returns to monarchism, a despotic King Trump would presumably still have put troops on the streets, who would inevitably be attacked at some point.
I’m already spending too much time untangling Loomer’s twisted brainwrongs, but I guess in her fantasy, an all-powerful King Trump would simply order that all Muslims in the United States be either removed from the country or… disposed of?
Fortunately, Loomer does not have her hands on the levers of power. Unfortunately, she’s much closer to those levers and being influential on America’s future than anyone reading this. That this fundamentally un-American lunatic has Trump’s ear should scare anyone who values the Constitution.
