Marble Arch Mound
(Picture: PA)A hill in Marble Arch that cost £2m to build has closed just two days after it opened, after it was inundated with criticism and forced to offer refunds to unimpressed visitors.
The 25 metre ‘Marble Arch Mound’ was designed by Westminster City Council to create footfall in busy tourist areas of the city by providing great (?!) views of Oxford Street, Hyde Park and Mayfair but safe to say, it’s had a bit of a journey.
When it opened on Monday, tickets to the temporary attraction were offered between £4.50 and £8. For this price, visitors could climb 130 stairs or take a lift to the ‘summit’. Once there, they were offered the chance to enjoy food and drink sold by M&S Food and there were even talks about some light shows in the future.
But people were left unimpressed by its charms.
Some pointed out that it looked like something from the Teletubbies:
The Marble Arch mound? The teletubbies did it better 😂 pic.twitter.com/Dz8cuvUfMZ
— Charlie Agnew (@Charl0ttesayshi) July 27, 2021
Marble Arch mound opens to visitors at a cost of £2 million. pic.twitter.com/fzBTlgTjEj
— J.R.Hartley’s Armchair. (@JRsArmchair) July 27, 2021
Others compared it to the Sims, Spyro, Minecraft and other computer games:
what has better graphics, the Marble Arch mound or Stone Hill from Spyro 1? pic.twitter.com/6dYj58qLim
— Joel (@HiJoelSmith) July 27, 2021
rare photo of the marble arch mound being built pic.twitter.com/R9nTQuroHm
— Danni ✌ (@Pseudannim) July 27, 2021
you cannot tell me the Marble Arch mound doesn’t look like the first level in mario 64 pic.twitter.com/Z4GqtjZqqB
— joshua (@joshcharles_21) July 27, 2021
Marble Arch mound looks like the awkward bits of land in The Sims that you have to use the flattening out tool on
— Susannah Butter (@susannahbutter) July 27, 2021
Others thought it was an inappropriate use of public money given that there are other issues occurring in the UK, like child poverty and regional inequality:
🤔😕 London wasted £2million building a mound of earth at Marble Arch
— Northern Independence Party 🟨🟥 (@FreeNorthNow) July 27, 2021
🟨🟥 Tell us again how there's no North-South divide? pic.twitter.com/40sMwvDxtp
I don't live in London. Is this a joke or have the Tories really built a 2 million quid slag heap by Marble Arch while children go to bed hungry and people sleep on the streets? https://t.co/qoat7v2B2X
— Undercover Elephant💙 🐘✊🌱 (@MrsNoone47) July 27, 2021
One person, Dan Barker, visited it and noted that it did not look like it did in its marketing photos, that the trees that had grown blocked the views, that it was expensive and that hardly anyone had shown up making the fast-track ticket option seem a bit pointless.
“I think they oversold it a bit,” he said.
I went to the Marble Arch Mound today. It cost £2 million to build, and today was launch day, but it was still quite quiet.
— dan barker (@danbarker) July 26, 2021
Here is a short thread with info.
First, the original plan drawings and the marketing description do not quite match reality. pic.twitter.com/Km4YFbxySm
But by and large, people just thought it was an incredibly lacklustre hill and proceeded to take the absolute p*** out of it:
I want to live in a hobbit house on the Marble Arch mound 😤
— Mollie Goodfellow (@hansmollman) July 27, 2021
Marble arch mound is the worst thing I've ever done in London pic.twitter.com/njmpOFxrbf
— Emma Wright (@emmabethwright) July 27, 2021
That Marble Arch thing just looks like a giant tunnel from a Hornby train set.
— Martin Costello 🏳️🌈🇪🇺 (@martin_costello) July 27, 2021
what if we kissed 😳 on the £2 million marble arch mound 🙈 pic.twitter.com/82vN7Om2cY
— Joel Freeman (@JoelJFreeman) July 27, 2021
I’ve been getting dynamic, panoramic views of London from the top of double decker buses for years. I feel such a fool now that I’ve found out about the Marble Arch hill.
— surreyspinster (@surreyspinster) July 27, 2021
If you're brave enough.....come fight me by the recycling bins at the Marble Arch Mound
— HK (@HKesvani) July 27, 2021
Yesterday, Westminster Council said it would be refunding anyone who visited the hill in its opening week to give it “time to bed in and grow”.
In a statement, it said: “We are aware that elements of the Marble Arch Mound are not yet ready for visitors. We are working hard to resolve this over the next few days.
“The mound is a living building by design. We’ll continue to adapt and improve London’s newest outdoor attraction and resolve any teething problems as they emerge.
“We’re sorry for the delay and look forward to welcoming visitors when they’re ready to enjoy all the mound has to offer.”
And now they have gone one step further and closed the whole cursed thing, admitting it was “not ready”.
A council spokesman said: “It is clear that it is not ready. People who have paid should have the right to go up. But ultimately we know it’s not ready. We acknowledge that. That’s why we are not letting people up.”
Meanwhile, MVRDV – the architects behind the project – blamed the “challenging weather” and how “unpredictable” it is working with plants and trees for how it looked but assured the public “it will get better”.
Speaking to Architects Journal they said: “It is a vulnerable installation, no doubt, but we just need to give nature a bit of time. The mound is designed with not only summer, but also fall and winter in mind; it is meant to have an overall green appearance during the time the installation is in place.”
As we say, quite the journey.
