Do you remember Hell’s Kitchen? No, not the US version, which has run for 20 years. I’m talking about the UK original from 2004 back when Gordon Ramsay was still a regular fixture over here and Angela Hartnett remained his plain-speaking protégé. And when celebrities were invited into the kitchen to cook and cause mischief. Now it is reportedly set to make a comeback.
Twenty-odd years ago, Ramsay was far from the polished, courteous businessman he is today. In those days every other word was “f**k” and tempers flared. I remember one episode in which the comedian known as Vic Reeves, most likely inebriated, ordered “two fried eggs on a china plate” while dining in the Ramsay branded restaurant. It prompted the chef to fly into one of his notorious rages. He later apologised but Reeves never did get his wish.
Such televised nonsense was par for the course back then. We’re talking about the time of Soccer AM, Dick and Dom in Da Bungalow and Big Brother (at its peak). This was before the financial crash of 2008, let’s not forget, and people were still living on the fumes pumped out during the roaring Nineties. Celebrities ran riot. And Hell’s Kitchen, presented by tabloid favourite Angus Deayton, was among the most chaotic shows of all.
One incident involved Coronation Street star Amanda Barrie actually clocking Ramsay in the face. “I’ll never live that down,” she said years later. “If it had been a bit harder it would have been better. I’ve never hit anyone unless it was well deserved.”
Imagine someone — soap opera legend or not — doing that now. Wouldn’t happen.
“In 2004, people were still living on the fumes pumped of the roaring Nineties. Celebrities ran riot. And Hell’s Kitchen was among the most chaotic shows of all”
And what about his ludicrous spats with former Tory MP and Hell’s Kitchen contestant Edwina Currie? Ramsay actually said to the politician: “One minute you're shagging the prime minister and now you are trying to shag me from behind!”
To which she snapped back: “It's only a bloody chicken.” Which was, let’s be honest, a fairly cool reply.
I quite enjoy how it all kicked off. The story goes the Ramsay invited the doyenne of Noughties food television, the late Pat Llewellyn, to Claridge’s to discuss his future. She told him: “I'm really sorry, I might be interested but you've got to stop doing blanket TV — little bits of crap that mean nothing”.
He respected such honesty and soon came Kitchen Nightmares — winner of a BAFTA (2005) and an Emmy (2006) — and then the F Word, which was a magazine-style programme not wildly dissimilar to Top Gear. Hugely outdated now and a little boring but also more entertaining than most of the stuff on now. The Bear? Boiling Point? These are worse if anything, glamorising tales of boorish, foul-mouthed and psychotic chefs. Have we moved on or not?
Anyway, the food TV of old ran out of steam and much has changed now. I remember filming at the Savoy Grill a pilot for a Ramsay show many years ago. It was something about breakfast and teams had to compete to serve us (a bunch of food journalists) bacon and eggs “with a twist”. In turn, we were encouraged to become upset about waiting so long for omelettes, Ramsay listening to us earnestly while we inquired as to their whereabouts. The series didn’t materialise.
Obviously I don’t think it would be appropriate for the language and practices of 2004 to make a comeback. Absolutely fucking not. I was 14 when Hell’s Kitchen aired and knew even then that Britain was ridiculous. Shouting is so unchic.
But it’s also true that food TV has become mind-numbingly boring. Nowadays I reckon unpretentious, relatively meaningless programmes might appear almost retro and to that end we should welcome them. All other genres offer escapism — food should be no different. Also, it’s about time Vic Reeves got his eggs.
