It’s safe to say that Donald Trump‘s attempted takeover of Washington, DC isn’t going to plan. Just as in Los Angeles, Trump deployed National Guard troops to the nation’s capital with the stated intention of cracking down on crime.
The real reason is a show of power to the city, to remind them who’s boss, and that if they even step slightly out of line, the White House will bring the wrath of god down on them. In reality, it’s achieving less than nothing, wasting a lot of money, and annoying the hell out of DC locals.
Recent polling indicates a massive 79% of residents oppose the takeover, with 69% of them “strongly opposing” it. Meanwhile, a majority of residents agree that the DC police force was already doing a good job. And, much to the White House’s displeasure, they’re making their voices heard. Loudly.
Chief Ghoul Stephen Miller made a speech yesterday alongside Pete Hegseth and JD Vance at a local Shake Shack (how dignified!) to try to take credit for bringing down crime, but was drowned out by residents protesting outside, chanting “FREE DC!”. Faced with this sheer insubordination, Miller promptly lost his cool:
Stephen Miller: "All these demonstrators that you've seen out here in recent days, all these elderly white hippies, they're not part of the city and never have been … we're gonna ignore these stupid white hippies that all need to go home and take a nap because they're all over… pic.twitter.com/v7Bj4pfEPW
— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) August 20, 2025
He first claimed the protesters had “no connection to this city at all”. Then launched into a bitter and bizarre diatribe:
“They’re the ones who’ve been advocating for the one percent, the criminals, the killers, the rapists, the drug dealers. And I’m glad they’re here today. … Because inspired by them, we’re going to add thousands more resources to this city to get the criminals and the gang members out of here.”
So confident, so righteous. So crushingly stupid. Miller then started playing an ol’ favorite:
“We are not going to let the communists destroy a great American city, let alone the nation’s capital. .. All these demonstrators you’ve seen out here in recent days, all of these elderly white hippies, they’re not part of this city and never have been. … So we’re going to ignore these stupid white hippies. They all need to go home and take a nap because they’re all over 90 years old.”
Verdict: shook. (Majorly shook). They wanted DC residents to quake in fear, but what they got was being hemmed into a fast food restaurant by “elderly hippies” who drowned out their idiotic speeches.
A real fountain of charisma
As it turns out, insulting the locals isn’t the best route to win their hearts:
Ditto. Right there with you.
— Tom Kennedy (@tomkennedy) August 20, 2025
And, anyway, they’re not white hippies:
That was quite the way to talk about protestors exercising their First Amendment rights, especially for a government employee.
— Dick Johnson(@DickJohnHack) August 20, 2025
It’s unknown where Trump is going to go from here. Any argument the White House had for taking over DC has collapsed, the residents are in revolt, and it’s beginning to look embarrassing. You have to wonder what they’re going to do if this resistance snowballs? At this point, I wouldn’t put it past Miller to simply order his troops to open fire on these “communists” trying to ruin his carefully laid plans.
