So that’s it for another Strictly Week – only three more to go, which makes me feel a bit sad, but also mildly elated at the prospect of Christmas/getting my weekends back.
Thank you all for joining in and sharing your thoughts and musings, you are very much the icing on my sponge, and it would all be a bit dry and tasteless without you. As if by magic, you can read my review of Ed’s best bits here, otherwise I’ll see you next week! Hx
Ed says lovely things about everyone, including being entirely charming about Katya, who has been the star of this year’s show as far as I’m concerned. Katya has a cry, and they take a final spin around the dancefloor to ‘That’s What Friends Are For’ by Dionne Warwick. Blub.
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So how will he judges vote? Craig saves Judge Rinder and Oksana, as does Darcey. Bruno does likewise, and Len would have done the same, even though his vote doesn’t matter.
Oh Ed, I will miss you. You’ve been an unexpected ray of sunshine in a pretty bleak year. Please keep dancing, the nation needs you.
It’s time for Ed! He knows he’s going very likely going home, so I really want this to be entirely insane. But actually Ed is really trying, which I love about him – he’s giving it both barrels right to the end, and it’s actually a very decent Tango. Bit dusty in here.
So this is still a Ropey Rumba from Rinder, but considerably better than last night – more fluid and less spiky. His face still looks like he’s dancing on Lego in bare feet, but whatever.
Let’s face it, unless Judge Rinder comes out and does the Macarena with his pants on his head, Ed is going home. Actually even that probably wouldn’t stop the judges getting rid of Ed.
Craig has secretly enjoyed Ed’s dancing, we learn. Perhaps a little of that could have made it to his scoring paddle? Isn’t that how the show works?
So who is joining Judge Rinder an Oksana in the dance off? Ore and Joanne are safe, along with Claudia and AJ, which means ED AND KATYA in the dance-off.
I’m focussing on the positive - we get to see both of their dances again, hooray!
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It’s time for a musical interlude, courtesy of Ellie Goulding. Face of an angel, voice of an angle grinder. Not sure about the underwear-as-outerwear plus feathery boots look either, she looks like a Flintstone.
Accompanying dance: barefoot contempo-wafting from Kevin and Karen. You’re welcome.
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“We all know how difficult the Rumba is for the male celebrity”, says Tess. Really? I had no idea. You should have said.
So who is in the dance off tonight, and who is safely through to next week’s quarter final?
Oh lord, I’d forgotten next week’s show has a FEEM – it’s Musicals Week, so prepare yourself for a Strictly Come Bingo heavy on props. It’s also the last week of only one dance, so it’s only an hour long – we should probably plan an afterparty.
Anyway Louise and Kevin are safe, along with Danny and Oti (obvs).
First couple in tonight’s Dance Off: JUDGE RINDER AND OKSANA.
Last night on Strictly: six pretty entertaining performances, all told. Highlights: Danny and Oti’s OMG Samba, Ed giving it Blue Steel on the chaise longue, Louise’s starry dress, Rinder’s Cha Cha hips. Lowlights: Rinder’s Rumba music and Billy Elliot theming, Animal from The Muppets playing drums on Justin Timberlake’s Cry Me A River.
Incidentally I watched both Ore’s Paso and Claudia’s Argentine Tango again today, and they both improved significantly with second viewing. Just don’t think I was feeling it last night.
Darcey appears to wearing frilly chaps. Stop it.
Tess and Claudia Dress Watch: Tess in a slashed-to-the-waist navy Aladdin pantsuit with one of the 7,000 metallic belts she owns, Claudia in a frilly lace lampshade. Both awful.
And we’re off! I love the point in the series where you’ve forgotten half the people in the credits ever existed. Like Anastacia.
This week’s opening pro dance has a vintage sports day theme, with lots of slapstick Charleston action. Lovely to see Gorka back after the Blackpool incident. This is making me itch, but rather fabulous all the same.
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It’s time for the Countryfile Casual Weatherman! This week it’s the very handsome John Hammond, rocking the check shirt/jeans/brown belt combo. He has very manly forearms.
Countryfile is reminding me of the week I spent narrowboating on the Monmouth & Brecon Canal. The weather was so bad we moored up in Crickhowell and spent most of the week in the pub watching the Rugby World Cup. Happy days.
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So in the interests of full disclosure, I know who is going out tonight – I was asked to prepare an article for when Ed Balls exits (a Strictly obituary, if you like), and needed to check this morning if tonight is the night so I could make time to write it if necessary. Obviously I’m not going to tell you if he does or doesn’t, but it seems right that you know that I know, you know?
Good, glad we got that sorted.
SUNDAY NIGHT RESULTS SHOW SPECIAL!
Evening all, and welcome back for tonight’s Results Show! It’s all getting a bit tense, both on the dancefloor and down in the comment box, with much discussion about judge favouritism, stage school/West End ringers and whether or not effort and improvement deserve as much recognition in the judges’ scoring as being a natural (or trained) dancer.
So here’s what I think – this show is not a level playing field, and never has been – it would be nigh on impossible for the celebrity bookers (who I think do a pretty amazing job) to find 15 slebs who a) we’ve actually heard of, b) don’t have huge work commitments and c) are all total beginners. On which note, be careful what you wish for – would you really want to sit through week after week of Pendletons, Widdecombes and Sergeants? I know I wouldn’t.
So I personally love that this year has been an unpredictable mix of guaranteed performers, natural blossoming talent and entertaining improvers – it’s made for great viewing every week. What I would like is for the judges to reflect effort and improvement in their scoring, but I accept that’s actually quite hard to do, and would very likely upset quite a lot of purists who believe the very best dancer should win. Incidentally, they rarely do.
On which basis, we should probably just take solace from knowing that, come the final on 17th December, it’s us that gets to decide who our Strictly champion is, and since it’s likely only one or two of the finalists will be experienced dancers, we can choose our people’s champion if we wish. Hooray.
Join me from 7.20 and we’ll find out who’s going home, and who is through to next week’s quarter finals. Laters, glitterbunnies.
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So that’s it for this week’s show! I’ll be back tomorrow at 7.20pm for the results show – my money’s on Ore and Joanne and Judge Rinder and Oksana in this Week’s dance-off, what do you think? Is Ed’s time finally up?
Thank you very much for joining in, am off to read all your comments – do come and say hello on Twitter @heidistephens if you’re passing. Enjoy the rest of your Saturday, and I’ll see you tomorrow! Hx
Time for a recap – the daughter’s votes this week have gone to Danny and Oti, Louise and Kevin and Ore and Joanne.
Seriously, watch this Samba again. It’s incredible - love Danny or not, he’s in a class of his own.
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The judges loved the wonderful hip action, and how much they’ve all improved since Week One (except Danny, who has always been amazing).
- In 6th place – Ed and Katya.
- 5th place – Judge Rinder and Oksana
- 4th place – Claudia and AJ
- 3rd place – Ore and Joanne
- 2nd Place – Danny and Oti
- 1st Place – Louise and Kevin.
Oh thank goodness, if they hadn’t put LouKev top it would have made precisely no difference to the very limited difference that made to the leader board. Sigh.
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Out come the stars in an array of lurid shades. Ore’s Cha Cha is looking good, but Danny is in a class of his own. Rinder’s Cha Cha hips are great, not really sure what Ed and Katya are doing but it’s quite swingy. That wasn’t nearly as much of a Sha Sha Shambles as I expected, I take it all back.
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Ooh, interesting twist! The stars have never heard the music until they start dancing. I quite like the potential for Ed Balls peril.
So that’s it for the main dancing bit, which means it’s time for the Cha Cha Challenge, also known as How Am I Supposed To Watch This Chaos With Only Two Eyes?
The judges can’t see what’s going on any more than we can, so it’s basically just an opportunity for them to boost the points of their favourites and put the less experienced dancers back in their box. As you can tell, I’m QUITE THE FAN.
Scores: 9,9,9,9 – a total of 36 for Claudia and AJ.
Bruno loved how strong and controlled it was, and Craig thought it was clean, precise and incredible. Darcey loved the balance, control and upper body strength (YES DARCEY SHE’S AN OLYMPIC GYMNAST), and she loved the sultry, moody character. Len loved the combination of frisky and risky – it was a knockout routine.
Claudia looks incredible, and this is an Argentine with bags of drama and intent. As expected some great lifts and shaping, albeit a bit contemporary for my tastes, would have liked a steamier, latin feel.
Meanwhile this version of Justin Timberlake sounds like a herd of cows loose in a drum shop. What the hell was that?
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And finally it’s Claudia and AJ! Tonight they’re dancing the Argentine Tango to ‘Cry Me A River’ by Justin Timberlake, which is an absolute CHOON.
I’m really interested to see how they tackle this, because the sharpness and intricacy of the Argentine usually benefits the leggier dancers, which Claudia is not. However she has a core of steel and the capacity for some impressive lifts, so it could be good.
Scores: 4,6,7,6 – a total of 23 for Ed and Katya. The judges can’t wait to be rid of him, can they? VOTE ED.
Len thought it was like lottery balls – you never know what’s going to come out next. It had plenty of great Tango content, and there is no doubt that Ed is the people’s champion. Bruno thought Ed was like junk food – you know you shouldn’t have it, but you can’t help wanting more. Craig thought his frame was hunched over and it was very stompy, but it was committed (and after that Ed should be). Darcey loved the focus at the beginning, but it started getting a bit bouncy in the stalking bits.
Ed’s recumbent on a chaise longue, trying to look alluring. He does a Tango with a rose gripped between his teeth, and his footwork and timing are as usual pretty decent. His posture is off-balance, however, but this is a proper Tango with that has given me plenty to smile about. LOVED that.
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Ed pretending to be a male model in training is amazing. I love him.
Who’s next? It’s Ed and Katya! This week they’re dancing the Tango to ‘(I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction’ by The Rolling Stones. Last week’s Ed Balls Of Fire Jive was a bit of a non-event, so Ed and Katya really need to pull something special out of his man-bag this week if they want the public to keep supporting them. Can a Rolling Stones Tango gather something more exciting than moss?
Incidentally, if you have any other proverbs you’d like me to do a hatchet job on, fell free to make make suggestions in the comment box below.
Scores: 6,8,8,7 – a total of 29 for Judge Rinder and Oksana.
Darcey didn’t think the narrative gave a purpose to the moves, but the RUMBA IS DIFFICULT FOR A MAN DRINK DRINK DRINK. Len thought it lacked a bit of naturalness, but Rinder coped admirably (for a man). Bruno thought it was very lyrical, but it got a bit staccato in places. A brave attempt, however. Craig thought it was a bit spiky and it looked awkward, but Rinder’s commitment is commendable.
Rinder is grinding a ballet barre, until Oksana schools him in the Rumba. He has great Rumba hips, but he’s got his sex face on again, and it’s quite distracting. Other than that, his Rumba shaping really isn’t that bad, although I’m not sure what his free arm is doing, Nice, but not setting anyone’s world on fire this evening.
Next up it’s Judge Rinder and Oksana! This week they’re dancing the Rumba to ‘Lean On Me’ by Bill Withers, and I’m calling Weird Song Choice on this already, so start drinking. That said, I’m very up for a full gospel choir while Rinder gets his snaky hips in gear – if you’re going for surreal, you might as well give it both barrels.
Scores: 9,10,10,10 – that’s 39 for Louise and Kevin. I suspect this evening is all downhill from now.
Craig thought Louise’s shoulders raised slightly, but it had grace, fluidity and style. Darcey loved how effortlessly they told the story though their dancing, and it had divine artistry. Len thought that dance was so good it could be one of your five a day. Bruno thought it was strictly beautiful, with stunning interpretation and musical phrasing.
Louise’s dress is gorgeous, much like this jazzy Waltz. All very elegant and romantic, with bags of style and charm. Louise’s top line is superb, really enjoyed that.
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Loving the training footage this week. Drink!
Next up it’s Louise and Kevin! This week they’re dancing the Waltz to ‘At This Moment’ by Michael Buble. Risky time of the series to do a Waltz, this could be instantly forgettable. Alternatively, it could be entirely floaty and fabulous, what the hell do I know.
Scores: 8,9,9,10 – a total of 36 for Ore and Joanne.
Bruno thought it was achingly stylish and original, and the shaping and attitude were outstanding. Craig thought it was potentially a contender for the quarter finals (DRINK), and it had strength, style and power. Darcey thought it had drama, intent and focus, and Ore’s shaping was lovely. Len thought it had power and purpose, but there was little incident at one point. Nice to see Ore sharing Kevin’s guyliner.
So this song is like the Tears For Fears version, but reimagined as the world’s most menacing John Lewis ad (DRINK). There’s too much flossing around on a table, but once it gets into actual Paso it has bags of atmosphere and attitude. It feels like Ore is overworking it, however, and I don’t really get what the hell is going on. Not my favourite dance of Ore’s, I fear for him this week.
It’s time for Ore and Joanne! Tonight will be dancing the Paso Doble to ‘Everybody Wants To Rule The World’ by Lorde. I quite fancy Ore as a master of the Paso, alongside generally fancying Ore. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it.
Scores: 10,10,10,10 – another perfect 40 for Danny and Oti. Follow that, everyone.
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Len loved how it started slow and then wallop – Danny’s hips were like snake, and it was fabulous. Bruno was hyperventilating, it was like watching a pagan mating ritual. Craig found the open shirt a distraction, but Danny’s hip action was incredible and it was brilliant. Darcey thought it was a Samba masterclass. Tens all round, anyone?
This starts off all quite Rumba-esque, and then the drums kick in and it all goes off. Great footwork and incredible rhythm from Danny, if you don’t mind that it all looking like a except from The Lion King. I don’t, and thought that was fabulous.
First up it’s Danny and Oti! Tonight they’re dancing the Samba to ‘Magalenha’ by Sergio Mendes. Last week’s Charleston got them a perfect 40 from the judges, but other than Danny being dressed as a lion tamer, I can’t remember a thing about it. Can he and Oti float my boat with a fabulous Samba?
Apparently they’re trying to make this Samba less traditional and more jungle/tribal. Castro is already spinning.
No sign of any feathers on this week’s celebrity outfits...hold on to your booze for now.
Darcey winning all the dress points in teal. GAWJUS.
Tess and Claudia Dress Watch: Tess in an old white sheet held on with bandages, Claudia in a spray-on pantsuit with gravy tan. 6/10.
And we’re off! Last week seven couples went to Blackpool, but Greg and Natalie went home. Gorka got his teeth knocked out by some pond life.
First VT featuring training! Drink!
Tonight’s Strictly Come Bingo – a mug of Ore’s tears for any occurrence of the following:
- Dance-inappropriate music choices
- VTs featuring training footage (we live in hope)
- Dry ice obscuring shaky footwork
- Mentions of next week’s quarter finals
- Feathers
I’m on the tea this evening, I was out dancing in London until 3am this morning and am nursing a sore head and very sore feet.
Evening all, and welcome to this week’s Strictly Come Dancing Liveblog! After last week’s Blackpool candyfloss and wet chips extravaganza, we’re down to six couples and only three weeks until the Grand Final. Three weeks! Seems like only last week we were sniping about Movie Week, how time flies when you can stop fleckerling.
After Greg and Natalie’s departure last week (sob), we’ve got an interesting couple of weeks ahead of us – will the Great British Public do what they usually do and turn their attention to the best dancers (Danny, Louise, Ore), or continue to save the entertainers (Ed and Judge Rinder)? In 2016 nothing would surprise me any more, and god knows we need something to smile about.
Either way Claudia falls somewhere in the middle, so my money is on her and AJ to leave the Strictly dancefloor this weekend, unless the judges get their way and either Ed and Rinder are in the bottom two.
Tonight’s show kicks off at 7pm with all six couples taking to the floor, followed by the much-anticipated* Cha Cha Challenge. Despite the tabloids pretending this is an evil Strictly tactic to oust Ed, it’s actually 2017’s version of last year’s Quickstepathon, and will almost certainly be a giant waste of everyone’s time.
As usual I’ll be shaking my thang up here, while you all add a little extra shimmy and sparkle down below. Who’s in? See you at 7!
*said no-one ever.
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