Saffron and AJ take to the floor for their last dance, to ‘Last Dance’ by Donna Summer, because it’s their last dance.
So that’s it for another week on Strictly! Thanks for joining in, and thanks again to Alex for facilitating my Elstree jaunt yesterday – he’s @alexneedham74 on Twitter, and I’m @heidistephens. Next week is MUSICALS WEEK, which is basically Movie Week with considerably fewer dances. Curtain up is at 7.10pm, so I’ll see you then! Have a great week, Hx
We get a highlight of Saffron and AJ’s best bits - it’s very clear that Strictly has been a huge deal for Saffron, and she should be hugely proud of how far she’s come.
I do worry that she might struggle with re-entry to her old life, which mostly seems to involve making vlogs with titles like ‘I ate only with chopsticks for 24 hours’ and ‘I went to the worst rated nail salon in my city’. I hope she has good people looking out for her (and her nails).
All the judges save Karim and Amy, which means SAFFRON AND AJ are leaving the Strictly dancefloor. Craig manages to take his trademark honesty to the next level with ‘tonight was kind of easy for me’, which I’m not sure was required.
Incidentally, this the third year in a row that AJ has been booted out after dancing a Samba. We should consider the possibility that AJ is either a) doing the Samba wrong or b) using it as a secret signal to the judges that he’s had enough.
Time for Karim and Amy’s Couple’s Choice again. It’s a bit frenetic for my tastes, and like a lot of contemporary dance features rather too much running about. That said, Karim’s dance talent is undeniable and he absolutely doesn’t deserve to be the bottom two.
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Dance-off time! I watched this Samba again this morning, and the best thing by far is the fraggle dress. No less stompy this time round, although Saffron is putting a brave face on it.
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Tess manages to stand in the vicinity of 26-year-old Karim without squidging his cheeks and commenting on this ‘liddle face’, which is very restrained of her.
So who is joining Saffron and AJ in this week’s dance off? Chris and Karen are safe, along with (SHOCKED FACES ALL ROUND) Alex and Neil!
Which means KARIM AND AMY are in the dance off, which is unexpected and caused plenty of gasps in the studio last night. I’m assuming a lot of people used their votes last night to save an undermarked Alex and Neil.
Dance debrief time! By this point I’d been in a very warm studio for over five hours, with the dance-off still to go and the prospect of a two-hour drive home. I needed a wee and a sandwich and was very much not interested in the finer details of Saffron’s Samba.
Time for a dance interlude, featuring The Greatest Dancer winner Ellie, who was coached by Strictly’s own Oti Mabuse. Part of her prize was to perform on Strictly – I’m not sure if this is dance or rhythmic gymnastics, but she is only 15 and undeniably bendy.
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Kelvin convincing his dad that he was going to part of his dance this week is both evil and brilliant. But mostly evil.
Saffron gets a bit tearful once again, having realised that her millions of YouTube followers are entirely unreliable when it comes to a 15-minute live voting window.
So who is through to next week’s musicals special? Emma and Anton are safe, which prompts Anton to give Emma the Heimlich manoeuvre. Kelvin and Oti are also safe.
First couple in the bottom two – SAFFRON AND AJ. I can’t say I’m surprised, that Samba looked like she was treading grapes.
LAST NIGHT ON STRICTLY: Saffron and AJ Walking Through Treacle, Alex being too tight downstairs (wait until you’ve had two kids, love), Kelvin and Oti making tea to Northern Soul, Emma and Captain Von Anton doing a gaptastic Quickstep (also bonus points for Shady Shirley’s ‘I didn’t recognise you, you look absolutely stunning’), and Chris and Karen’s Anger Management Paso (which I actually really liked).
Feel like Motsi’s hair needs a special shout-out this week. It’s very Chaka Khan, and I am here for the hotpants.
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TESS AND CLAUDIA DRESS WATCH: Tess in a section of broken copper piping, Claudia in a metallic sack. Scrap value: £0.
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And we’re off! We open with a musical interlude – this week it’s Andrea Bocelli, accompanied by the London Community Gospel Choir and a bonus string section. I was lucky enough to see this performed twice last night, and it was stunning both times. As an added bonus, five pro couples are giving us bedsheet contempo-waft.
For those of you asking what Dick & Dom’s Bogies is, I give you this from Wikipedia:
The most infamous part of Dick and Dom in da Bungalow was a pre-recorded game called Bogies. In this game, Dick and Dom situated themselves in a quiet public place such as a museum or restaurant and took turns to shout “bogies” at gradually increasing volumes, until one of them did not shout as loud as the other (judged by the Bogeyometer, or Snotometer, which appears on screen to rank the bogey), or quit due to embarrassment.
Caught the Countryfile Casual Weather earlier – a sterling effort from Alina Jenkins in a denim shirt, but there was evidence of ironing and her hair has clearly never had a roll in a hayloft. 5/10.
SUNDAY NIGHT RESULTS SHOW UPDATE!
Evening all! I’m back from my jaunt to Strictly; Ella and I had a lovely time. Huge thanks to Alex for being an excellent stand-in, I’m now back on the liveblog sofa until the glitterball is lifted on 14th December.
So, here are my top five bits of last night’s trip to Elstree:
- Bruno’s opening song, which I had to listen to 2.5 times. During the second recording Johannes fell over (GASP) so they had to start again. However it was a camptastic two fingers up to The 189, so more pink feathers please
- It was also a time filler because the traditional Week 10 dance-a-thon is DEAD. No more Pasodoble-thon, Lindyhop-athon, or any other Guff-athon. All things considered, I’ll take Bruno.
- Dick & Dom played BOGIES in the Strictly studio during the interval, and it was excellent
- Didn’t see a single step of Kelvin and Oti’s Couple’s Choice, as I was sat behind the kitchen. Lovely joinery on the plywood backing. Clapped along like a seal nonetheless, then watched it on iPlayer this morning.
- And finally, my absolute fave bit of last night was the recording of tonight’s musical interlude. I beg you not to miss it.
Obviously I already know the outcome of tonight’s dance-off, but I will keep proceedings spoiler-free. Kick off is at 7.15, see you then!
Michael McIntyre’s now on the TV which probably means it’s time to go to the pub. Thanks very much for keeping me company. Heidi will be back for the results show, hopefully with some gossip from the Strictly studio, which is where she is right now. Keep dancing!
So the votes are open! My prediction for the dance-off is probably Alex v Emma but the dance gods move in mysterious ways. Kelvin and Karim both look like nailed-on certs for the final. But who can say?
The scores: 8-8-8-7. Chris is pretty thrilled with that. Meanwhile, the audience erupts in boos.
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Bruno says Chris went for the kill but the lines were lacking and he wasn’t always on the beat. Craig thought it was “full of menace, darling”. Motsi says it gave her goosebumps – she adored it. Shirley applauds the sophistication and says he “did well in places” though there were missteps. But she loved it.
Chris is in a sheer shirt and it all has plenty of attack and impressively crisp fast footwork. He’s also doing a decent job of being menacing. The band are really giving it loads, is there a whole orchestra back there?
It’s the last couple – Chris and Karen with the paso doble in which he has to be “evil Chris”.
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Emma says it was way better in rehearsal - oh dear. The scores: 6-8-7-8
I feel that Motsi should probably avoid upstairs/downstairs metaphors.
Shirley says Emma looks stunning, but there were some timing and footwork issues. Bruno says she went wrong and it nearly gave him a heart attack but next time (in the dance-off?) it will be spotless. Craig says it went pear-shaped but “well done anyway”. Motsi says her frame was great (“upstairs was brilliant”) but the feet were ... less so.
You can’t go wrong with Diamonds Are a Girl’s Best Friend. Or can you? Emma’s in shocking pink and they’re doing it in the Moulin Rouge arrangement. It looks pretty light and slick to me. Well done Emma and Anton!
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It’s Emma and Anton who are doing the quickstep. She got a 10 last week so hopes she’s peaking at the right moment.
The scores: 8-10-10-10. Go Kelvin!
Never thought I'd hear Northern on #strictly2019
— Alice Nutter (@alicenut1) November 23, 2019
Motsi says that loved it and that it felt so real. Shirley says he’s made everyone proud. Bruno says it was clever and charming. Craig says he loves a bit of northern soul but he didn’t like the part set in the kitchen. But overall a thumbs up.
And he’s doing the dance in Oxford bags! There’s no chalk on the floor but it’s got plenty of Northern Soul flair and is absolutely joyous to watch. Some splendid spins and kicks too.
It’s Kelvin and Oti who are also doing a couple’s choice – to the Northern Soul classic Do I Love You (Indeed I Do) by Frank Wilson which reveals Kelvin as a man of taste. It’s dedicated to his lovely missus Liz.
It turns out that their microphones got entangled on the dancefloor which explains a few things. The scores: 4-7-7-8 which is pretty harsh.
Craig says it was heavy and flat-footed (which shows how much I know about this dance). It even looked as though she was churning butter, Craig adds to boos, and that she was too tense. Motsi says “You need to be tight downstairs”, a double entendre which delights the audience. Shirley says the emotional connection was outstanding but that there were mistakes. Bruno says it was scorching hot and she got into the role, that she’s different every week. So a bit of a mixed bag really.
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Alex and Neil are doing a very foxy Argentine tango to INXS’s Never Tear Us Apart with some mega lifts and super-crisp footwork. The kicks and flicks are off the charts and, apart from one bit at the end where they lost their grip of each other, it was pretty amazing.
Alex has gone to get pepped up at Arsenal on the VT.
Alex and Neil are doing the Argentine tango. Obviously most of you have passed out by now after draining your house of booze in response to Bruno’s rendition of Can’t Take My Eyes Off You.
Poor Karim, he nearly had another “Viennese waltz moment” ie blubbed. Scores: 9-9-10-10. Woop!
Bruno roars that it was brilliant, mixing the sharp and angular into flowing movement. He even invokes the great choreographer Mark Morris which is praise indeed. Craig says it had great leaps and turns but that it was too coldly technical and lacked emotional content, which means that he doesn’t give him 10s. The audience gasps and Karim said “I’m trying so hard” – oh dear. Motsi says Karim’s technique is unbelievable but perhaps slightly implies that she agrees with Craig. Shirley says the feel was more about internal sensitivity and she loved it. Hurrah!
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Having said all that, this is quite a strange performance – a bit of a ballet/interpretive dance number masquerading as a rumba. There were some very impressive leaps from Karim but I didn’t love that. It was a bit like the odd Stranger Things-inspired tango from Halloween night rather than his best stuff.
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It’s Karim and Amy. Have to say that he’s my favourite - he’s a brilliant dancer and adorbs to boot. In the pre-performance VT he’s talking about his family while some very cute childhood pictures flash up. Unless he drops a clanger in the manner of the week before last when all his footwork went wrong, I think he’ll go the distance.
Tameka Empson from EastEnders and 3 Non Blondes is reading out the T&Cs. This is usually the point at which I go to the loo or something tbh.
The scores are 5-7-7-7 which isn’t great. Is Saffron toast?
Shirley said it was nice and bright but there were some issues. Bruno said it had a lot of gusto but the rolls weren’t fluid enough and the accents were on the down rather than the up (whatever that means). Craig though the footwork was sloppy and that it looked heavy. Motsi, whose outfit tonight is simply extraordinary, said that there was something amiss with Saffron’s bounce.
And we’re introducing the band. Dave March’s combo can play anything you can throw at them – hats off.
So Saffron is in a maibou feathered creation and samba-ing to Walking On Sunshine. It looks a little laboured to my eyes although there are some nice arm movements and the chemistry between her and AJ is always a delight.
So it’s Saffron and AJ up first with a samba. They were in the dance-off last week – can they work the magic tonight? She’s rehearsing in front of her social media followers for a boost ... not sure that’s the effect it would have on me.
Tess and Claudia dress watch – BOTH in sparkles and off-the-shoulder numbers. Claudia in black, Tess in a yet more pink. And why the heck not?
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Lolololol
Bruno surrounded by men in pink suits , think that's a message to the 189!!
This is brilliantly awful. And not in Bruno’s key at all, bless him. It’s making the Boytown Gang’s famously camp version sound like Bruce Springsteen.
OMG it’s Bruno doing Andy Williams’s Can’t Take My Eyes Off You surrounded by dancers in pink. For a singer, he makes a great judge.
We're on!
OK, we’ve got a slow-motion montage from Blackpool. Six couples left! And don’t they look lovely ...
I think we also need a drink if there’s any kind of awkward allusion to the Curse of Strictly (so far dormant this year) in the way Motsi managed when she said to Neil and Alex, inspired by her quick dance with Kevin while Neil was injured, “It’s as if you had an affair!”
I’m getting a strong sense from some of the comments that I should be organising some kind of Strictly bingo/drinking game. So how about:
- Motsi offers her false nails to one of the contestants in lieu of superlatives – drink!
- Claudia’s eye-makeup is declared the blackest substance on earth by Anish Kapoor – drink!
- Someone makes it extremely obvious that they have the hots for Kelvin (declared “extremely fit” this morning by Emma my hairdresser) – drink!
- Bruno Tonioli performs a song – drink the entire cocktail cabinet dry (warning: this is actually happening)
We’re back at Elstree for Strictly!
Good evening sparkle gang – Heidi’s watching Strictly from Elstree studios tonight, the lucky thing, so I’m stepping in as a substitute. Please be gentle with me.
Last week saw Michelle Visage knocked out after a couple’s choice dance which was un hommage to Madonna’s performance of Vogue at the MTV awards in 1990, in which Madge vogued dressed as Marie Antoinette. While on paper this should have been camp heaven, in practice it was a bit of a dud and saw Michelle out on her ear, crying into her candyfloss with only the Blackpool illuminations to console her (maybe).
She was up against Saffron and AJ in the dance-off, which makes you wonder whether the social media star’s days are numbered. I’m also quite mystified by the persistence of Chris – he’s not all that great a hoofer and, let’s be honest, a bit annoying. Perhaps it goes without saying that I’d never bloody heard of either of them before this show. (Chris and his wife Rosie have a podcast incidentally.)
Speaking of AJ, I very much enjoyed his appearance on the final episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race UK with his brother Curtis (the latter of Love Island notoriety), in which he tried to choreograph the three remaining queens. His somewhat exacting teaching style did not go down well with hard-bitten glam Scouser The Vivienne, who observed: “AJ’s a feisty little thing, isn’t he? I’ll kick him into the fuckin’ lighting rig if he doesn’t cut it out.” Not the kind of lip, you assume, he gets from Saffron.
Strictly has been in the news this week – it turned out that 189 people had complained about a routine in which two men – Johannes Radebe and Graziano di Prima – danced together. Presumably they were concerned that this might compromise the rugged heterosexuality of the rest of the show. Difficult to know what to say to such people, although “get a life” certainly springs to mind. Anyway, if you were one of the 189 and you’re reading this liveblog ... sorry. Please put down your phone or close your laptop lid, because you’re barred.
As for the rest of you – I’ll be sure to keep an eye on the comments as I’m liveblogging tonight. You can also get me on Twitter @alexneedham74 or what the hell, even email me – alex.needham@theguardian.com if the spirit moves you (let me groove you). I’ll see you back here at 7pm – Heidi will be back for the results show tomorrow night. Time to pour the prosecco (or get the kettle on in my case).
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"You need to be tight downstairs."
Is Motsi just trying to make Neil blush every week?