Every parent wants to encourage their children to follow their dreams. Whether they aspire to be an astronaut, doctor or ballet dancer, Mom and Dad will always be standing on the sidelines cheering them on.
Stepparents, however, aren’t necessarily obligated to show the same amount of support. After sitting through countless meals listening to her teenage stepdaughter sing her lungs out, one woman finally hit her breaking point. Below, you’ll find all of the details that the stepmom shared on Reddit, as well as a conversion with parenting expert Sue Atkins.
Many children grow up dreaming of becoming a successful singer
Image credits: Alyssa Yung / unsplash (not the actual photo)
But this woman wants her stepdaughter to face reality, as she’s tired of being subjected to terrible singing during mealtimes
Image credits: A. C. / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Gigi / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: aitaloudsinging
“A stepparent can absolutely have a role in setting boundaries—ideally in alignment with their partner”
Image credits: Getty Images / unsplash (not the actual photo)
To learn more about this situation, we got in touch with Sue Atkins. Sue is an internationally recognized parenting expert, broadcaster, speaker and author of several Amazon best-selling books. She has also recently created a School Readiness Program to help parents and educators of young children.
Sue was kind enough to have a chat with Bored Panda and discuss when it’s appropriate for stepparents to discipline their stepchildren.
“It depends on the relationship, the family dynamic, and how long the stepparent has been part of the child’s life,” the expert shared. “In the early stages, it’s generally better for the biological parent to take the lead on discipline to maintain stability and avoid resentment.”
“However, over time, once trust and mutual respect have been established, a stepparent can absolutely have a role in setting boundaries—ideally in alignment with their partner and communicated as part of a united parenting approach,” Sue says. “The key is consistency, clarity, and love.”
So was sending the teenager away from the table an appropriate consequence for singing loudly during meals? “This response might feel more like a rejection than a consequence, especially for a teenager who may already be struggling with belonging,” the parenting expert noted.
“If the singing was disruptive and persistent, setting a clear boundary—like asking her to stop and explaining why—is reasonable,” Sue says.
“If she continues, a more fitting consequence might be a calm conversation afterwards to understand what’s behind the behavior, or involving her in setting agreed-upon mealtime expectations. Consequences should ideally guide, not shame,” she continued.
“When a teen is seeking attention in ways that seem inappropriate, it’s often a clue that they’re not feeling seen, heard, or valued”
Image credits: Kristina Begdairova / unsplash (not the actual photo)
We also asked the expert how parents can get to the root of attention-seeking behaviors like constant singing at the table.
“All behavior is communication,” Sue noted. “When a teen is seeking attention in ways that seem inappropriate, it’s often a clue that they’re not feeling seen, heard, or valued in some other part of their life.”
“The best approach is curiosity, not criticism. Parents can start by spending one-on-one time with the teen, asking open-ended questions, and listening without judgment,” she told Bored Panda. “Creating emotionally safe spaces helps teenagers open up and allows parents to address unmet needs rather than just the surface behaviors.”
Finally, Sue added that blending families takes time, empathy and a lot of open communication.
“Every member of the family, including the teenager, is navigating complex emotions,” she explained. “The goal isn’t perfect harmony right away but building trust and mutual respect step by step. When challenging behaviors arise, it’s an opportunity to lean in, not pull away. Connection first—then correction.”
“If you’re navigating life as a stepparent or parenting teens in the digital age, explore my practical resources, scripts, and guides here,” Sue shared. “Whether it’s handling big emotions, setting boundaries, or simply having better conversations, I’ve got your back.”
Some readers thought that the author had been way too harsh and encouraged her to sympathize with the teen
Meanwhile, others thought that everyone involved could have handled the situation more maturely
And some readers sided with the stepmother, noting that her actions were justified
