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The Guardian - US
The Guardian - US
Entertainment
Guardian staff

Stephen Colbert on Tucker Carlson: ‘Some people are just addicted to being dicks’

Stephen Colbert on Tucker Carlson’s airing of footage from January 6th: “Cherrypicked innocuous clips to try to rewrite what we all saw happening with our own eyes.”
Stephen Colbert on January 6 footage: ‘Cherry-picked innocuous clips to try to rewrite what we all saw happening with our own eyes.’ Photograph: YouTube

Stephen Colbert

“Thanks in large part to the former president, there’s a whole industry of people who make a good living trying to make you think you’re insane,” said Stephen Colbert on Tuesday’s Late Show, which focused once again on Fox News. “Well, I make a very good living reminding you that you’re not.

“You’d think that once the people gaslighting you on a daily basis have been revealed to be liars – say, in multiple text messages and a $1.6bn court filing by Dominion Voting Systems – they would pump the brakes,” he added, referring to the lawsuit which has exposed how Fox News anchors and owner Rupert Murdoch knowingly endorsed Trump’s lies about the 2020 election. “But apparently, some people are just addicted to being dicks.”

Specifically, host Tucker Carlson, who on Monday evening aired security footage from January 6 and, as Colbert put it, “cherry-picked innocuous clips to try to rewrite what we all saw happening with our own eyes”.

With clips of rioters strolling the halls of the Capitol, Carlson claimed “these were not insurrectionists. These were sightseers,” and said “they’re not destroying the Capitol. They obviously revere the Capitol.”

“Yes they obviously revere the Capitol so much that they queued up neatly to smash those windows,” Colbert deadpanned.

Carlson also argued that the Missouri senator Josh Hawley, lampooned by the January 6 committee for running from the riot that he helped incite, was calmly leaving “at the back of the pack”.

“I stand corrected: Josh Hawley is not just some hypocritical coward. He’s a hypocritical coward who runs slower than 70-year-olds,” Colbert said. “And may I remind you, those people were all running for their lives from what Tucker describes as a meek sightseers.”

Meanwhile, failed Arizona gubernatorial candidate and election denier Kari Lake won a straw poll for Trump’s vice-presidential pick at last week’s Conservative Political Action Conference. “She must have been so honored to have Maga voters choose her as the nice vice-president they try to hang,” Colbert joked.

A representative for Lake tweeted: “We’re flattered, but unfortunately our legal team says the constitution won’t allow for her to serve as governor and VP at the same time.”

“That’s a good point – Kari Lake is currently the sitting governor of the state of denial,” Colbert quipped.

Seth Meyers

On Late Night, Seth Meyers mocked Tucker Carlson’s claim on Fox News that footage “does not show an insurrection or a riot in progress”.

“Yeah, OK, but when you cherry-pick the footage you’re showing, you can prove whatever you want,” Meyers retorted. “I could show you footage from John Wick that proves he’s not violent.”

In response to Carlson, Trump posted on Truth Social to “let the January 6 prisoners go”.

“You guys know we can see what you’re doing right?” Meyers responded. “Kevin McCarthy, who is Trump’s Waylon Smithers, gives all the footage to Tucker. Tucker shows only the tame parts, and then Trump claims the rioters were framed.

“It’s like watching a magic show where the magician is wearing sheer sleeves.”

The Daily Show

“You know how the whole world remembers January 6 as the day a bunch of violent Trump fans stormed into the Capitol?” said the Daily Show’s guest host, Marlon Wayans. “Well, according to Fox News, we just got the footage wrong.”

Wayans replayed Carlson’s cherry-picked narrative of the insurrection, in which he claimed the rioters were mere “sightseers”.

“Sightseeing my black ass,” said Wayans. “If you have to punch a cop on your way in, you’re not sightseeing. You’re fight-seeing.

“All Tucker Carlson proved is that you can make anything look better by not showing the bad part,” he continued. “How come they never show 9/11 planes taking off?

“In a way, some of this footage is even more disturbing,” Wayans added, pointing to a clip of a man “just cleaning shit up” as he stormed the Capitol. “That’s a straight-up psychopath. I bet this guy goes to orgies and does Wordle.”

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