“England are talking themselves up more, they’re confident coming to Australia with the group of players they’ve got and fair enough, this is the best team they’ve had probably this century.”
As Marnus Labuschagne wheeled away in delight after pouching the catch that sealed the Ashes for Australia in tranquil Adelaide, it wasn’t just pre-series optimism from the English – or delusion, as per plenty since – that had been popped into a blender and turned into mush after 11 largely one-sided days.
The above came from Ricky Ponting, one of the sharpest minds in the sport, and reflected belief on both sides of the divide that this time things would be different: that this England team, forged in the image of their aggressive captain, Ben Stokes, and boasting a phalanx of quicks, would be able to compete.
But all this was underpinned by faith in the non-negotiables being in place: that details such as conditioning, workloads and fielding skills would be ticked off; that, despite a positive outlook fostered by Brendon McCullum, pitfalls such as driving on the up in Perth and Brisbane, or the intensity of the spotlight, would be well known.
Instead, following a whirlwind of dropped catches, scattergun seam bowling and general batting confusion from the tourists, it is Australia who go into Christmas 3-0 up and can start plotting another whitewash. Only the all-time great side led by Steve Waugh in 2001 and 2002-03 have secured the series victory so quickly, while England are now up to 18 Test matches in Australia without a single win.
In some ways the last two days in Adelaide only furthered the frustration with England – that sense of them turning up too late. They fought back well with the ball on Saturday and, though 435 would have represented a world-record chase, they got to within 83 runs. That was until 2.11pm when Labuschagne, already the embodiment of Australia’s superior fielding with two hall-of-fame catches in the match, took the edge that Scott Boland induced from Josh Tongue.
If there was one pre-series prediction that has held up it was probably that Australia’s age profile might lead to bodies creaking. Josh Hazlewood is sitting out the entire series, Usman Khawaja went in the back in Perth and missed Brisbane, while Steve Smith sat out Adelaide with the recurrence of dizzy spells. On the final day Nathan Lyon twanged a hamstring and looks likely to miss the last two Tests.
But even with Pat Cummins also absent until this week after a back injury – and already admitting Boxing Day will likely come too soon – Australia have no soft underbelly, rather an iron-clad six pack of battle-ready replacements such as Michael Neser, among the stars at the Gabba. England’s bench, by comparison, includes a clearly untrusted spinner and a batter without a first-class century.
Cheered on unrelentingly by their supporters on the grass bank, England at least gave a dash of hope on the final day. Resuming with 228 runs still to get, four wickets in hand, they made Australia toil for their wickets before ending up 352 all out. Will Jacks again showed his aptitude with 47 from 137 balls, Jamie Smith turned around his form with 60 from 83, and Brydon Carse scrapped to 39 not out.
Yet in a continuation of a running theme, Starc ensured the loss of another senior player, Lyon, was not felt. Smith’s dismissal may have been a top-edged hoik to the second new ball, another example of his giddiness after a rash of quick fours. But the removal of Jacks was the latest exhibition of the left-arm wobble-seam mastery that has taken Starc up to 22 wickets for the series.
Along with Travis Head’s triumphant conversion to opener and that smack-in-the-face century in Perth, Starc’s role in the first two Tests was key to dismantling England’s long-held philosophy. As Cummins noted afterwards, a grind to 286 all out in their first innings – or at least a grind by their standards, at just 3.27 per over – was evidence of a touring side having veered from their own beliefs.
“It was 40-odd degrees, it was hot, it was a very flat wicket and they shut up shop for half the day, which I was pretty happy with,” said Cummins. “They seem to have changed their style quite a bit game to game. That can happen in overseas conditions. You’re always trying to find a method that works.”
Stokes and McCullum have always insisted their approach has never been about fast scoring per se but seeing a batting paradise such as Adelaide taken on with such caution can be read as a team that ultimately blinked. With Stokes having personally set the tone since the final day in Brisbane, it is hard not to wonder whether captain and head coach remain on the same page.
Perhaps, despite their wildly different personalities and methods, McCullum’s tenure is becoming similar to that of Justin Langer with Australia: the right appointment for that particular moment in time but one that the team no longer require if they are to evolve. Charming though he is, Cummins was ruthless in pushing for change.
The next three weeks will likely tell us more, England needing to salvage something out of the last two Tests in Melbourne and Sydney and Rob Key, the team director, due to address the media in the coming days. Ponting’s pre-series prediction of 3-2 to Australia remains technically possible but even that may not save this regime.
