Age: 52
Appearance: Shiny
I know him. Isn't he that guy from that thing? Yes. He's Stanley Tucci.
Stanley Whocci? You know, the actor. Bald, charming, does a good job in a supporting role in 43% of American movies.
You're exaggerating for comic effect, right? Of course I am. The true percentage has not yet been calculated. So far he has done Prizzi's Honor, Road to Perdition, Lucky Number Slevin, The Lovely Bones, The Devil Wears Prada, Captain America, Beethoven, The Hunger Games, The Terminal, Burlesque, It Could Happen to You, Julie and Julia, Space Chimps, Robots, The Pelican Brief, Space Chimps 2 …
OK, OK, I get it! He even had a supporting role in Miriam Margolyes's greatest ever interview, on The Graham Norton Show. And now he's the villain in Jack the Giant Slayer.
What the What? It's a big-budget fantasy movie that just opened in the US, and opens in the UK next week.
Should I be excited? Probably not. The American critics weren't especially. Nor were the US public.
I see. One of those movies that is more fun to make than it is to watch? No. One of those movies that isn't either. Tucci says that making a movie in 3D with CGI just makes the whole experience rather annoying. "It was pretty funny," he told a journalist, "sitting around in chairs, everybody with little caps on, tight spandex things with little balls all over you. I'm not kidding. It's so humiliating!"
Sounds great. I think I'd rather watch that than the actual movie. Sadly no footage has been released yet. And Tucci wasn't finished. He said the special cameras kept breaking down, leaving the actors waiting for hours on end. And that working in front of a green screen isn't interesting anyway.
Is he also fussy about bad scripts? Less so, I think it's fair to say. Although Tucci is at least up-front about it, saying: "I'll be honest an independent film, you do it because you love it, but I think motion-capture movies are the ones where you have to be paid a lot of money."
Do say: "Actor available, not fussy. Can sit on chairs, shave head, wait politely..."
Don't say: "…Will work for less than Stanley Tucci."
