No sign of his opposite number, so that, my good friends, is your lot. Ben Fisher was our man braving the weather down on the south coast. His report has landed, so you know what to do. Click click! Thanks for reading this MBM.
Sean Dyche is very happy. “It was a tough one for sure. They’re in good form and have a lot of energy. They were the better side in the first half. I gave them a reminder at half time of what it takes, and in the second half we had more control. A fantastic finish by Vydra. It’s a squad mentality. He hasn’t had a lot of football, but he’s worked hard, come in today, and got his reward for keeping himself right. A lot of credit goes to these players.”
On this stormy afternoon, a magnificent Matej Vydra thunderbolt knocked the wind out of Southampton’s sail. The home side did nothing after going behind for a second time, and despite Danny Ings’ excellent first-half strike, were beaten fair and square. In-form Burnley move into the top half of the Premier League table; they’re on 34 points, one behind ninth-placed Manchester United. Southampton stay in 13th on 31.
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FULL TIME: Southampton 1-2 Burnley
It’s ten points out of the last 12 for Burnley. Saints are booed off.
90 min +3: Vydra takes the ball towards the flag out on the left, and tries to trick Vestrgaard into fouling him. He doesn’t win a free kick, but the clock ticks on.
90 min +2: Four added minutes. The first two whistle by without Saints threatening.
90 min: Saints are leaving all sorts of gaps at the back now, as they chase the equaliser. Hendrick creams a pass towards Vydra, who is free down the middle, but McCarthy comes out of his box to clear. Then the home side go up the other end, Hojbjerg bringing down a left-wing cross, just to the right of the six-yard box. He slaps a shot straight at Pope, though take nothing away from the keeper’s work. He made himself big, and looks to have secured the three points for Burnley.
89 min: Rodriguez rasps a rising shot towards the top right. McCarthy tips it over. Corner. It’s swung towards the back post, but Vydra can’t connect and the pressure’s off the home side.
88 min: Obafemi goes up for a high ball with Bardsley, and leaves an elbow on the Burnley man’s temple. He’s extremely fortunate to get away with just a yellow card. He should be walking.
86 min: Long is replaced by Adams. Saints win a corner and do nothing with it.
85 min: Ralph Hasenhuttl is livid with the no-penalty decision, and he’s got a point. On the one hand, Mee didn’t move his arm towards the ball, in fact he was pulling it away. However, that arm was hanging well wide of the defender’s body. Not a completely natural position. File under: You’ve Seen Them Given. Burnley have got away with one there.
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83 min: Stephens channels his inner Beckenbauer and dribbles down the inside-right channel. He reaches the byline and crosses. The ball clatters into Mee’s arm. Saints demand a penalty kick, but there’s a VAR check, and they’re not getting it.
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81 min: Djnepo drops a shoulder to make space down the left, but his cross is aimless. Cleared.
79 min: Ings gifts the ball to Vydra in the centre circle. Burnley flood forward. Eventually Taylor is released into acres down the left. He enters the box and fizzes a fine pass along the corridor of uncertainty. But neither Hendrick nor Rodriguez is on the front foot, and a ball that was begging to be poked home flies harmlessly out for a throw. Burnley really should have put Saints out of their misery, but the home side are still in this.
78 min: Armstrong cuts in from the right and has a dig. The shot’s deflected over for a corner, from which the same player shoots, 25 yards out. The effort is as wild as the weather.
77 min: Obafemi makes off down the right and is barged over from behind by Tarkowski. Not for the first time this afternoon, the referee does nowt when he should be whistling like billy-o. He’s been poor today.
75 min: McNeil sprints off down the left. He’s got options in the box, where there are more green shirts than red. But his pullback for Hendrick is dismal, behind the man, and Hendrick can only drag a weak effort goalwards. Rodriguez intercepts and slots home, but he’s clearly miles offside, and the flag goes up. Burnley should have put this game to bed.
74 min: Ings crosses deep from the left. It’s a decent cross, but nobody’s there at the back post. Nobody gambling. Nobody taking a chance. Ings gesticulates at his team-mates accordingly.
73 min: Saints throw on another attacker. Obafemi comes on for Walker-Peters.
72 min: Taylor burns down the left and wins a corner, from which McCarthy flaps thin air. More displeasure in the stands. Then Bardsley has a crack from the best part of 40 yards. Even in these conditions, that was at the very limit of realistic ambition.
70 min: Bardsley nearly feeds Rodriguez down the right. McCarthy comes to the edge of his box to gather, then shanks a clearance straight out of play. The home crowd groan, hoot and holler. They’re not happy with the way Southampton are going about their business right now. They’ve been dismal since conceding the second goal.
68 min: Djenpo concedes possession cheaply in the centre circle. Had Vydra been a little livelier, a break was on, but he dawdles and Saints swarm him to rescue the situation. The home crowd are getting a little antsy.
66 min: Ward-Prowse and Walker-Peters combine down the right again, the latter whipping a low cross into the mixer. Ings is sniffing around, but it’s Tarkowski who is brightest and snuffs out the attack.
64 min: Walker-Peters and Ward-Prowse probe down the right, but can’t find a chink in the Burnley armour. Saints have dominated possession this afternoon, but once again they’re not getting any reward for it. Same old story.
62 min: Saints try to strike back immediately, Bertrand having a dig from 25 yards. It looks as though the shot is deflected behind by Tarkowski, but Saints aren’t getting the corner. On the touchline, with the rain flattening his Conan O’Brien quiff, Ralph Hasenhuttl openly seethes.
GOAL! Southampton 1-2 Burnley (Vydra 60)
What a goal this is! With the rain swirling like mad, Hendrick launches long from the right, finding Vydra on the edge of the Saints box, with his back to goal. He takes two touches to nudge the ball to the left, turns and larrups a stunner into the top left past a sprawling McCarthy. That’s some finish, and out of nothing, Burnley regain the lead.
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59 min: McCarthy blooters long. Ings gets the better of Tarkowski down the inside-right channel, but there’s no angle for a shot and his cross is way too high for his partner Long in the centre.
58 min: Latest score: Match 0-1 Storm Dennis. More when we have it.
56 min: Bardsley goes clattering into Djnepo, becoming the latest player to get away with one. The referee’s decisions are becoming positively psychedelic.
54 min: Taylor goes sliding in on Armstrong, out on the right touchline, catching both ball and man. It’s a clear foul, but not given by either lino or ref. The referee is beginning to flirt with Shocker territory.
52 min: Vestergaard, quarterbacking from deep, sprays a stunning diagonal ball towards Ings on the right. Ings can’t bring it down. He’d have been clear. What a pass, though.
50 min: Vydra turns cutely on the byline, just to the left of the Saints box. Stephens trips him clumsily, but gets away with the foul. Vydra is furious, and he’s got every right. He’d have been away.
48 min: Saints establish a modicum of control. They stroke it around the midfield for a while, then Djnepo dribbles down the left and slips a pass inside for Bertrand, who slaps an instant shot into the side netting. He had more time than he thought, and should have done better.
47 min: Hectic nonsense in the early stages of this half, as the teams try to come to terms with the wind again.
Burnley get the second half underway. No changes.
Half-time entertainment. Nick Ames has been poking around Ralph Hasenhuttl’s old gaff. Here’s his report.
HALF TIME: Southampton 1-1 Burnley
Saints have been the better team, and Danny Ings scored a marvellous goal. But he was also at fault for Burnley’s preposterous opener, so here we are.
45 min +4: The wind is swirling around St Mary’s, and the players are beginning to struggle. Passing sequences at a premium right now. Half time can’t come soon enough.
45 min +2: Ings nearly closes down Pope as the keeper dallies over a launch upfield. Not quite, but full marks for the press.
45 min: There will be five added minutes.
43 min: Mee is booked for his agricultural obstruction of Ings in midfield. No complaints about that one.
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42 min: Hojberg sends a diagonal ball into the Burnley box from a deep position on the left. Walker-Peters zips in from the other flank and isn’t far away from getting on the end of the cross, but Pope reads the danger well to claim.
41 min: The rain continues to fall. The wind still blows. The players are trying their best.
39 min: Boufal can’t continue. He limps off and disappears down the tunnel, to be replaced by Djnepo.
37 min: Boufal is down, having tweaked something while sending in that second cross. A shake of the head as he gets some treatment. In the dugout, Ralph Hasenhuttl curses his luck. Boufal has looked very dangerous.
36 min: Boufal dribbles with great purpose down the left, but there’s nobody in the middle to convert his pullback. Boufal tries again with another run, and loops long, but Long’s header at the far stick is soft and easy meat for Pope.
34 min: Westwood slips a cute pass down the middle for Vydra, who should do better with his attempt to poke the ball towards the bottom left. McCarthy gathers with ease.
33 min: So having mentioned how entertaining the match has been, it’s now gone a bit scrappy. Pulitzer, please!
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31 min: Now it’s Vydra’s turn to attempt a homage to Bergkamp’s aforementioned goal against Newcastle! There must be something in the air. But Vestergaard stands firm as Vydra traps and spins, and puts an end to the Burnley striker’s ambition.
29 min: Cork comes straight through the back of Ward-Prowse, wrapping his leg around his opponents. That looked painful, though the Saints man isn’t hurt badly. For some reason, the referee doesn’t book Cork; it wouldn’t have been a completely absurd decision to send him off. But it’s just a firm word. Very strange.
28 min: Armstrong chips a pass down the inside-left channel for Boufal, who nearly executes a Bergkampesque trap and spin to free himself in the box. Not quite. The ball runs out of play. But nearly. Boufal was clearly of a mind to replicate this:
26 min: Hendrick is booked for a cynical clip on Boufal’s heel. From the resulting free kick, Ward-Prowse slips Boufal into space down the left. Boufal curls a cross onto the head of Stephens, who rattles the crossbar with a fine header. Burnley escape. This is great to-and-fro entertainment, despite, or perhaps because of, the conditions.
24 min: Saints have done very well to work their way back into this match after that ridiculous start. Especially when you consider what happened to them the last time they played at St Mary’s in a tempest. That Leicester City game must have crossed their minds, albeit briefly. Top marks for mental fortitude.
22 min: Vydra comes on for the stricken Wood.
21 min: Burnley get the game going again, and nearly regain the lead immediately. Bardsley pearls a low diagonal shot from distance on the right. The lurking Rodriguez sticks out a boot, but can’t guide it into the bottom left. The ball flies inches wide.
20 min: The game hasn’t restarted yet, because Wood is down clutching his hamstring. Up he gets, and off he goes, shaking his head. He won’t take any further part in this.
GOAL! Southampton 1-1 Burnley (Ings 18)
Danny Ings makes up for his role in Burnley’s goal! And how. He snatches onto a loose ball, on the edge of the Burnley D. He shifts it right, taking three Burnley defenders out of the game, and curls a stunning shot into the bottom corner. That’s a delightful finish, the shot set outside the post and curled back in, leaving Pope with no chance.
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16 min: Vestergaard is caught faffing around 25 yards from his own goal by Hendrick. Rodriguez nearly makes off with the ball, but loses control. Vestergaard is booked for following through while being robbed by Hendrick.
14 min: The wind is picking up. That’s quite the state of affairs, given that Hojbjerg took a shot earlier that basically took a u-turn in mid-air. This could get interesting.
12 min: A free kick for Burnley out on the right. Hendrick sends a big diagonal towards Tarkowski, who brings the ball down with a deft touch. He’s in space, but slams his cross into the first man. A waste, because Saints’ high line had been busted open and the home defence was all over the shop.
11 min: Burnley’s goal was timed at one minute and 35 seconds. According to BT Sport, it’s their fastest start in an away match in the Premier League. The statistician earning their corn with that one.
9 min: The set piece comes to nothing. But Long’s soon skedaddling down the inside-left channel to win another corner for Saints. That’s a bit of a non-event as well, but this is a decent response to falling behind in farcical circumstances from the home side.
7 min: Armstrong has a dig from 25 yards, just to the right of centre. Tarkowski sticks out a leg to divert away for a corner, Southampton’s first of the match.
5 min: Saints try to hit back quickly, Boufal looping a cross from the right towards Long at the far post. Long heads back across goal, but with Pope out of position, there’s nobody there to poke home.
4 min: What a bizarre cock-up. I have no idea what Ings was doing. A deliberate decision to let the ball past. Did McCarthy give him a shout to leave it. A bum steer? It’s one explanation.
GOAL! Southampton 0-1 Burnley (Westwood 2)
It won’t be easy for Saints, that is. Wood powers his way down the left and wins the first corner of the game. Westwood takes, and curls it towards the near post. Ings is guarding, but decides the ball is hitting the side netting. It’s not, though. Ings opts to let the ball through. In it curls, direct from the corner. Ings puts his head in his hands, as well he might. What a fiasco, and he can’t blame the wind. A huge misjudgement.
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And we’re off! Saints get the party started. The conditions are appalling, it’s tipping down, and the wind’s up. The ball is immediately hoicked into the stand. That may or may not be a sign of things to come. It won’t be easy.
The teams are out! Saints are in their famous red and white stripes, while Burnley sport their third-choice evergreen. We’ll be off in a minute. Meanwhile, speaking of jazz-fusion bassist Alphonso Johnson, as we were, sort of, at 12.08pm: “OMG! That is so weird!” begins Derek Smalls Colin Young. “I have had that image of Weather Report’s Mysterious Traveller LP cover as my computer desktop image for as long as I have had a computer. Never seen it anywhere else. Nobody I know knows what it is ... so obviously it has to turn up on the Guardian’s football blog for a Saints vs Burnley game. Clearly. But I do agree, ‘Cucumber Slumber’ I mean that bassline, it, erm, blows away (sorry) most other basslines in the world. So obviously this game is going to be a breeze.”
The managers have their say. First up, Ralph Hasenhuttl: “Nathan Redmond has a muscle injury. It’s hard to say how long he will be out. But this is a chance for other players to show up. This is an important game. We lost the first game 3-0 so we want to show we’re better now.”
And then Sean Dyche: “We will find out a bit more about Matt Lowton’s knee injury later this week. But the good news is Charlie Taylor is back from a niggling hamstring. It’s not easy to knock out wins all the time, you’re going to have spells, and it’s about how you come out of them. And we have come out with an edge to our performances, with a little x-factor.”
Weather report:
That is some bassline. In other news, Storm Dennis has arrived on the south coast, and my oh my it’s a good old blow. So the wind and the rain may play some part this afternoon. This could be a jazz odyssey.
Saints make four changes to the side that went down bravely at Spurs a couple of weeks ago. Alex McCarthy replaces Angus Gunn in goal. Kyle Walker-Peters makes his debut at right back. Jannik Vestergaard and Stuart Armstrong return. Missing out: Jan Bednarek, Oriol Romeu and Nathan Redmond.
Burnley make just the one change to the XI named for the goalless draw with Arsenal. Matt Lowton is replaced by Phil Bardsley.
The teams
Southampton: McCarthy, Walker-Peters, Stephens, Vestergaard, Bertrand, Armstrong, Ward-Prowse, Hojbjerg, Boufal, Long, Ings.
Subs: Adams, Djenepo, Romeu, Obafemi, Smallbone, Gunn, Bednarek.
Burnley: Pope, Bardsley, Tarkowski, Mee, Taylor, Hendrick, Westwood, Cork, McNeil, Rodriguez, Wood.
Subs: Brownhill, Brady, Hart, Pieters, Lennon, Vydra, Long.
Referee: Simon Hooper (Wiltshire).
Preamble
Saints and Burnley don’t put on a show when they get together that often. Their last six meetings have produced a grand total of nine goals, and three of those came in a lopsided 3-0 win for Burnley on the opening day of this season. Needless to say, the goalscorers in that one, Ashley Barnes and Johann Berg Gudmundsson, are missing today.
There’s not a whole load riding on this game, either. It’s true that neither side is totally safe from relegation worry. But it’s also surely the case that, relatively comfy in mid-table and seven clear of the drop zone, both sides are far too good to be seriously concerned about their fate. Saints deserved far more than the square root of eff all they got from recent visits to Anfield and the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium, while Burnley have recently won at Old Trafford. So there’s little jeopardy in this.
What I’m doing here, brazenly, dear reader, is tempting fate. If this low-energy preamble doesn’t earn us a rollocking seven-goal thriller, nothing will. Come on, footballing gods, teach the MBM some humility. It’s on!
Kick off: 12.30pm.
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