And here’s Mike Selvey’s day five report:
What a damp, disappointing end to a Test that featured such fireworks: from Ben Stokes to Jonny Bairstow, Hashim Amla to Temba Bavuma’s historic innings. It’s somehow glorious that cricket can deliver a match full of so many records, so many landmarks, so many twists and turns, and then peter out with rain, bad light and a draw. See you for the next one …
It would appear that’s that - a draw in Cape Town, with England taking their 1-0 lead into the third Test of four on 14 January.
Looks like game is over. Match drawn.
— mike selvey (@selvecricket) January 6, 2016
There are conversations between umpires and players in the changing rooms, but no handshakes, beers opening or general Let’s Call The Whole Thing Off-ing as yet.
The umpires are wandering out to the middle - so perhaps some news in a minute or two.
Gloom news: Ah ... so it turns out the match won’t be definitively called off at 2.30pm (UK time) as the umpires can wait another hour beyond that if they want. So it could be 3.30pm UK time. Which is ridiculous. Just call the thing off.
Gloom news:
Updated
Bad light has still stopped play. Unlikely to be any more play for the day, but there should be word in 15 minutes or so.
Well, Amla had to do something as neither of these batsmen was going anywhere with the spinners on. But he must have known that throwing the ball to Morkel was likely to result in the players going off the pitch. Perhaps he thought he might get away with one over of pace and might get a wicket as a result? Either way, his decision has basically meant these is not likely to be anymore play today and England go into the third Test 1-0 up.
Bad light stops play
Hashim Amla suggests he might bring Morne Morkel on for a bowl and the umpires immediately say that’s that. It’s unlikely they’ll be back but there will be a 45 minute wait until it’s officially a draw.
Updated
65th over: England 159-6 (Bairstow 30, Moeen 10)
Oxenford decides that he won’t have a ball and Elgar does so instead. He bowls faster, then slower, flatter then flighted. Bairstow blocks and leaves. Maiden.
64th over: England 159-6 (Bairstow 30, Moeen 10)
Piedt catches Moeen’s edge and Amla moves silly mid off to second slip. Bruce Oxenford resists the urge to join the cordon. A maiden. In fact, get used to reading the word ‘maiden’.
63rd over: England 159-6 (Bairstow 30, Moeen 10)
Bairstow steps back and efficiently punches Elgar for two through the off side. Morkel returns the ball from the deep and it bounces over Elgar’s head - and potentially for overthrows until umpire Oxenford reaches up and catches it for him. Extraordinary.
Updated
62nd over: England 157-6 (Bairstow 28, Moeen 10)
Piedt has a short leg, deep silly mid, short silly mid and slip around Moeen, a triumvirate who make up a tight circle when you factor in the keeper and bowler following through. Moeen shows zero interest in attacking anything though. Maiden.
61st over: England 157-6 (Bairstow 28, Moeen 10)
Elgar, as expected, bowls from the other end. His left armers get a little drift as he comes around the wicket to Bairstow. Again, there is almost no effort to score from the batsman, until Elgar flights one and Bairtow wafts unconvincingly for a two off the outside edge and through the vacant third slip(ish) area.
60th over: England 155-6 (Bairstow 26, Moeen 10)
It’s gloomy at Newlands, which you suspect means it will be spin from both ends lest the umpires call the players off the pitch. Piedt starts up from one end and Moeen blocks, blocks, then blocks again until Piedt finds a bit more turn. Moeen blocks that one too, but the ball squirts off the face square but safe.
Covers off now
— Ali Martin (@Cricket_Ali) January 6, 2016
Well, that was exciting.
“Phew!” phews Nick Mannion. “Thank goodness we have Moeen to bat at eight and save us … rather than a front line spinner that could have won us the game eh!?”
Yes, but who is this frontline spinner? And, two, as Barney Ronay once memorably pointed out, “Moeen Ali remains a pointlessly luxurious delight at No8, ice cream for dinner down the order” Or, in this case, an actual batsman who can, in theory, bat time if needs be.
But not, as yet, on the pitch
— Ali Martin (@Cricket_Ali) January 6, 2016
@TomBry England should declare now. SA would struggle to make 158 in 38 overs, and with the gloomy weather Broad and Anderson could deliver
— Ingabire Peace (@IngabirePeace1) January 6, 2016
Erm ...
The weather: the report at Cape Town airport, where they have a vested interest in knowing what the weather is doing, is that it’s going to rain a bit this afternoon but not by much and that it won’t rain properly until 8pm. I’m guessing it won’t snow, though.
@TomBry View from my balcony in Berlin. Praying it makes its way to Cape Town in time. pic.twitter.com/UhmaeqqILv
— FFOURS (@ffoursmusic) January 6, 2016
Hello all. Could it be that this is almost the perfect Test for an Englishman? A period of massive dominance, in which hopes were dramatically raised by a thrilling innings in which someone could be hyped beyond all belief. Then the realisation that, though the innings was great, it was still on a flat pitch and that the other team could bat on it as well. Then the traditional collapse, the heart-in-mouth couple of sessions. Then the inevitable slump towards a draw and potential rain. It so Englandy. It’s like a metaphor for The Empire: dominance based on belligerence, everyone else catching up, throwing most of it away, then basically sitting in the rain.
“I blame Ben Stokes for this mess,” writes James Aitchison. “The game would have meandered to a guaranteed draw if he’d batted at a more responsible pace on day two.”
Updated
TEA
59th over: England 155-6 (Bairstow 26, Ali 10)
Elgar attempts to conjure some carnage before tea. But Bairstow plays him with the sort of respect usually reserved for the Pope. That is the end of that session, one which reads 68 for two. It’s gloomy, drizzling and, for my money, England are safe.
At Tea, England 157 runs ahead, 4 wickets in hand, minimum 37 (-2) overs remaining.... #saveng
— Innocent Bystander (@InnoBystander) January 6, 2016
58th over: England 155-6 (Bairstow 26, Ali 10)
First runs for Moeen in what seems like an age, as Morkel is full on legstump and is clipped in front of square for two. A third yorker is kept out to end the over. One more before tea...
57th over: England 153-6 (Bairstow 26, Ali 8)
Couple of Moon Balls have all and Athers thinking wistfully of Jeremy Snape. But after the near miss in the previous Elgar over, Bairstow is not taking any chances. He does use a flatter delivery outside off stump to nick two runs through extra cover though.
56th over: England 151-6 (Bairstow 24, Ali 8)
Morne Morkel back into the attack and, after one delivery over the wicket, he decides to come around to Moeen Ali. That might have something to do with the foot holes over the wicket. Ali leaves the first three as the wind picks up to carry the dark clouds over Newlands. An LBW appeal, but it’s sliding comfortably down the leg side. Maiden.
Mountain has gone. pic.twitter.com/WW0DMcF97d
— Ian Ward (@Wardyskycricket) January 6, 2016
55th over: England 151-6 (Bairstow 24, Ali 8)
“Go on the claw!” shouts a South African fielder, as Dean Elgar comes on. He’s left-arm spin, around the wicket to Bairstow, who presses forward and leaves outside off stump. Then a brilliant delivery from Elgar – flighted and dipping on Bairstow – gets through him and de Kock has the bails off. It’s so excruciatingly tight – Bairstow was almost on his knees during the endless replays, looking despondent – but it’s not out. And he smashes the next ball through point for four! RAIN! THERE’S RAIN IN THE AIR! OH SWEET, SWEET RAIN - NOURISHER OF THE EARTH, DELAYER OF TRAINS!
Updated
NOT OUT!
My word that’s tight, which ever way you sell it. Jonny Bairstow was convinced he was out...
Updated
REVIEW
Bairstow looks like he has over-balanced and been stumped off Dean Elgar. But the replays seem inconclusive and we’re getting treated to all the available angles...
54th over: England 147-6 (Bairstow 20, Ali 8)
Good stuff from Bairstow: strong in defence yet wise to the runs. Gets two through cover, which could have been three had he not slipped over while turning for the third. He loses his bat down the pitch as a result but instead of going after it, he dives back to make his ground first. Morris summons a bit of extra pace to beat the outside edge. Bairstow acknowledges the quality of the delivery before pushing the final ball into the legside for a slip-free three.
Bairstow slipping over there. Clearly very dangerous conditions. Player safety is paramount. Call it off.
— Dave Tickner (@tickerscricket) January 6, 2016
53rd over: England 142-6 (Bairstow 15, Ali 8)
A maiden. Ali’s bat moves with all the beautiful looseness of a silk pashmina before coming down to block like a slab of concrete.
“I am in Mauritius [getting married but also logging on to the OBO),” says Marcus Shuttleworth on e-mail. Congratulations, from all of us, Marcus.
“What with the time difference between here and theUUk and here and Cape Town I’ve no idea whether this is close or not so close at all. Should only be a couple of hours until close of play right?!? After all, we couldn’t just be throwing it away could we?”
We’ve got 30 minutes till tea. I’d say if England – specifically these two – are still batting, it’s all good. Even an extra wicket and I’d still be pretty comfortable.
52nd over: England 142-6 (Bairstow 15, Ali 8)
A couple down the legside for Morris as he looks to burgle one. The first gets a bit of Bairstow rather than his bat and races away for four leg byes. The second is wide of him and requires a scampering take from Quinton de Kock.Really nice from Bairstow, who uses the pace and width to cut behind point for four. OOOOOOOO! Last ball of the over, Morris gets one to rear up – Bairstow punches it (literally) but to the left of short leg, who’s a little further back than usual. Over.
Updated
51st over: England 134-6 (Bairstow 11, Ali 8)
Piedt begins the procession of dots once more, but Bairstow takes three into the offside. Moeen Ali is on strike and immediately drives aerially through cover point. And breathe.
GET EM OFF.... #saveng #AbuDhabiRevisited https://t.co/0BSMa5poV8
— Innocent Bystander (@InnoBystander) January 6, 2016
I’m ditching my cynicism for some of what John Davies is having:
“No-one seems to have talked about the other option for this match. If we get a 197 run lead and the Saffas have 46 overs to get those runs, they will surely try for the win. That gives us a chance to win instead, doesn’t it? Remind me, who was the OBO-ist who was grateful not to be scheduled to work today as it was set to be so dull?” I think that might be Dan Lucas. Silly Dan.
50th over: England 129-6 (Bairstow 8, Ali 6)
Sequence of maidens ended with the first ball of the over, bowled by Morris, as Moeen times through midwicket for two.
“Following a long night out in Paris many years ago,” starts Matt Fordham, “I got on a morning train at the nightmare of a station that is chatelet les halles for the short trip to my flat in the suburbs. A moment later I awoke, still in the same station. I assumed there was a slight delay until the train started moving. In the wrong direction. So I had to get off and try again from the even more dreaded Gare du Nord. Took nearly all morning to get home.”
“Better than Adelaide mark 2 any day.”
49th over: England 127-6 (Bairstow 8, Ali 4)
Jon Keen on email: “I’ve got a sneaky feeling this match could end up as that rarest of things – a tied game. Now I’m desperately trying to get a betting company to quote me odds on it!” The Betfair exchange is offering 190 on the tie, if you’re *looks around to make sure everyone is listening* keen... A third maiden in a row.
48th over: England 127-6 (Bairstow 8, Ali 4)
A couple of wicket replays have me jumping out of my seat. All in favour of this:
Said it before and I'll say it again. Replays of wickets should have the sound turned down.
— Dave Tickner (@tickerscricket) January 6, 2016
Moeen Ali is on strike and leaving outside off-stump until, fourth ball, he plays uppishly in the direction of point. It falls well short of him but my already frayed nerves are given a working over. Another maiden.
Updated
47th over: England 127-6 (Bairstow 8, Ali 4)
Piedt is tweaking. Every ball is now a live grenade, full of potential carnage. The slower ones seem the scariest: teasing the batsman through the air and daring to spit as it pitches. Nothing particularly worrying from Bairstow’s point of view. Maiden.
46th over: England 127-6 (Bairstow 8, Ali 4)
Vish here to take you through to tea. There are 51 overs left in the day (two overs for change of innings remember). Bairstow gets two through an open cover. It’s open because that’s exactly the shot Amla and Rabada want him playing. “If only Stokes hadn’t scored his runs so quickly,” starts Richard Naylor, “then South Africa would never had had the time to real England’s score AND bowl us out!” He’s got a point. Solid defensive play from Bairstow, who ends the over with a risk-free three through midwicket.
45th over: England 122-6 (Bairstow 3, Moeen 4)
Piedt is looking to tempt Moeen, tossing the ball up, getting some drift and more or less hoping that the batsman will be so overcome by drool he lofts a shot high into the air. Not working yet as Moeen is watchfully defensive. Vish will be back for the rest of this session: email him here - vithushan.ehantharajah.casual@guardian.co.uk
Here’s Mac Millings, meanwhile: “This story has come up before, and doesn’t bear repeating, but here it is anyway. Many years ago, I was on a train in China during Spring Festival (around Chinese New Year), a time when it seems that everyone in the country is on the move. The train was packed, and, just when you thought no one else could get on, we’d pull in at a station and more people would climb in through the windows, after first handing up baggage and children. It was fun for me until the food poisoning I’d unknowingly contracted eating dodgy train station food kicked in. I struggled over the mass of humanity to the toilet (a little room with a hole open to the tracks below as they chugged past), to find three people asleep in it. So I hiked back to my seat (held for me by my wife). As time went by, I kept getting worse. I tried to hold it in, really I did. First, I threw up out of the window. Then I took out my travel-convenient lunch pail, lowered my trousers and, in front of 100s of surprisingly nonchalant fellow passengers, emptied my bowels into it. I still have the lunch pail, by the way; and yes, I have since eaten out of it.”
44th over: England 122-6 (Bairstow 3, Moeen 4)
Bairstow plays Rabada as if he is bowling hand grenades on a minefield, before Moeen comes to the crease and scares every England fan by attempting to leave the ball but not very well. Instead, he dangles his bat and is lucky the ball trickles towards the boundary for three, having caught the edge, and flashing past the slips along the ground.
In terms of snatching disaster from the jaws of a ho-hum draw, and by the means of extending the ludicrous analogy of falling asleep on the train, England have just brazenly ordered a plastic thimble of wine from the on-board trolley, then passed out in the lap of the passenger next to them.
43rd over: England 116-6 (Bairstow 1, Moeen 0)
Taylor looked sickened by that, though the ball did grip after hitting that big crack that has opened up outside off. But really, this is poor from England. Yes, the ball has moved laterally for the first time in the match - but on a surface that has been utterly benign so far, they should really be able to bat this out.
WICKET! Taylor c Bavuma b Piedt 27 (England 116-6)
The Fear is creeping in. Piedt gets one to turn from outside off, Taylor prods at it, and the ball bounces up off his glove and into the hands of Bavuma at short leg.
Updated
42nd over: England 115-5 (Taylor 27, Bairstow 0)
Every time this match appear to be back on even keel, England find a way to rock the boat. Rabada is finding a nice line and Taylor is having to be very cautious in response. It must be tense as all hell in the England dressing room, some serious mental disintegration in the offing if they’re not careful.
Here’s something worth reading:
WICKET! Stokes c Morkel b Piedt 26 (England 115-5)
Stokes sweeps again, but more aggressively. He thwacks the ball high into the air, top-edges it, and is caught right on the boundary at head height by Morkel.
Updated
41st over: England 111-4 (Taylor 27, Stokes 22)
A double change - Piedt comes on for a twirl at the other end. Stokes watches him for a few deliveries, before sweeping him hard through short leg’s, erm, legs for four. But then …
40th over: England 111-4 (Taylor 27, Stokes 22)
Morkel’s gone out for a graze, to be replaced by Rabada. He sends a good ball past Stokes’s outside edge to some oohs and aahs, before the batsmen mistimes a carve through the off side for two. A ball later, he gets it right, cutting high over point for a boundary and to bring the score to Nelson.
A man who has asked for his name to be withheld writer: “Once got a train from Cambridge to meet my girlfriend in London as we hadn’t seen each other in a while. When I got to the ticket barrier there was a train at the London platform so I ran through the barriers, jumped on the train and within seconds the doors had closed and it pulled away. It took only a couple of seconds to realise that the train was going the wrong way. I ended up sat on a bench at a tiny station in the village of Waterbeach waiting over an hour for the next train to London.
“When I finally got into the capital, three hours later than I had arranged to be there, my girlfriend broke up with me, and I was back on a train home within the hour. What a day!
“(I am now happily engaged so I can laugh at that story now, sort of...)“
39th over: England 104-4 (Taylor 27, Stokes 15)
Morris is getting prodigious swing, but Taylor seems a little more comfortable this over - content to leave wide ones outside off. Morris bowls one fuller and Taylor attempts a drive, but simply pings the ball into the ground and bouncing back up to the bowler. That one nearly snuck through. Morris’s final delivery is a curious one: he runs all the way in, goes through his action and, his feet a touch wrong, simply doesn’t let go of the ball. Easier said than done, I’d imagine, when you’re steaming in on off the long run. England lead by 106.
Jim Harris has been going nowhere: “Further to your friend’s* experience on the Littlehampton train, and Jon Perry and Ed Taylor’s friend’s* adventures in Dumpton Park and Osaka, a more mundane but strangely pertinent late night journey was one I took (yes, uniquely, I’ll own the story) on a No343 bus some years ago.
“I boarded in Regent Street after an evening with friends in London’s glamorous West End (expensive drinks, cheap transport), headed for Queens Road, Peckham and the short walk home to Nunhead. Settling into the steamy top deck, I was asleep before Piccadilly Circus and awake again what I thought was five minutes later, wiping the condensation from the window to see where I was - which was Regent Street, headed north, in the opposite direction, having been to Deptford Bridge and back without stirring. I got off, crossed the road and caught the next bus at the same stop I’d started from about two hours before.
“Not unlike returning suddenly to Adelaide having travelled all round the world and precisely nowhere. Please let that not be true.”
38th over: England 104-4 (Taylor 27, Stokes 15)
Morkel, around the wicket and back of a length to Stokes, bowls outside off and is ignored. So he straightens his line, drops the ball fuller and is punched straight down the ground for four. Piqued, Morkel goes wide of the crease and pings on in at Stokes’s body. The ball beats bat and hits Stokes hard on the hip above the thigh pad. He goes down in a heap, briefly, then is quickly back on his feet.
“At some time during the late 70s or early 80s, a good friend (honestly, guv) went to Headingley for a Test against the Windies,” recalls Andy Tyacke. “It was, for a change, piddling it down with no prospect of play so he stopped off at the Original Oak (known to generations of rugby and cricket fans and zillions of students) which is close to the ground. Here he became good pub friends with a group of Windies fans and had a great time, so he recalled.
“What happened after the aforementioned great time is not in his memory card. He was awakened the next morning by the rush hour crowds and discovered that he had slept in a skip in Tottenham. He never found out/remembered how he was transported from Yorks to north London but, on checking his wallet, he discovered the same amount of money/cards etc as he had left home with the previous day. Not being a Yorkshireman, he remained seriously embarrassed at having drunk so much of other people’s beer without buying a round in return.”
37th over: England 100-4 (Taylor 27, Stokes 11)
Morris tails one into Taylor’s off stump, the ball darting in very late. He’s getting some good reverse, and is bowling at decent pace too, which has Taylor twitchy and playing for the swing. Morris sends another one down, which doesn’t reverse as much, and has the batsman uncertainly prodding outside off. Good over, and a maiden.
Joe Catling gives good stat: “Not only has no team ever lost a test after scoring more than 600 in their first innings, no player has lost one scoring 250+ in a single innings, which should provide incentive to Ben Stokes to stay in, if any more were needed. Currently the record is 242 (Ponting vs India, Ad*laide 2003). The full list reveals that one BC Lara scored 200+ three times, and 150+ eight times, in losing causes.
36th over: England 100-4 (Taylor 27, Stokes 11)
Morkel steams in again, Taylor dancing about the crease like Len Goodman with pins in his socks. It earns him a couple of runs as he flicks the bowler to fine leg. Taylor does the same, awkwardly, to a short ball on his hips at the end of the over and an uppish prod earns England a single to bring up their 100 while the South Africans all yell “Catch!”
“A quiet Wednesday drink in the fair city of Guangzhou, South China, ended with me having a blazing row with the taxi driver for taking me the wrong direction and me storming out of the taxi only to realise, after the taxi had pulled away, that I was about 500 metres from home and that I had left a bag with passport, computer, house keys, wallet, etc. in the taxi. Luckily, China is an authoritarian dictatorship where all taxis are GPS tracked and the next day I could therefore identify my ride and retrieve my possessions from an irate driver (I did have to give him the RMB equivalent of a tenner for the trouble of dropping my stuff back to my flat). Not sure how that can be applied to Cook’s situation.”
Hmm: let’s have a go at making that work. If Cook is you, your possessions are his form, then the taxi is a handy metaphor to just what has happened to him since arriving in South Africa.
35th over: England 97-4 (Taylor 24, Stokes11)
That’s the end of Piedt, Morris steams in his place and gets the ball to swing both ways. Third ball, he lures Stokes into an inopportune drive across the line from a full delivery and the ball is nicked just past the grasping hands of fourth slip to the boundary. Lucky from Stokes and a good over from Morris. England lead by 99.
Here’s Jon Perry with more tales of seemingly mundane days turning into outright disasters: “A few years ago I was living in rural Japan. One day I went with some friends to the next big town on the train for a night out. Now, to get back home the last normal train was at around 11.30pm, but a sleeper also passed through at around 2am which was convenient for kicking out time from the pubs and clubs and handily took you straight home.
“Most of us had arranged to stay with friends in the big smoke, but one needed to go home that evening, so she got on the sleeper train. Unfortunately, she fell asleep. Sound asleep.
“The problem with sleeper trains is that they tend to go a very long way, and she woke up in Osaka, a full 200 miles from her intended destination. Just a touch glum, she waited until the first train back in the morning, paid for a ticket going back home. Fell asleep again. This time woke up 50 miles past home in the other direction. By the time she finally reached her front door, it was 3pm and she had shelled out about £150 in train fares.
“Every time since I’ve complained about English trains, I’ve also been silently grateful that they’re not efficient enough to whisk you half a country away without you even noticing. Though if we lose here, Alistair Cook might want exactly that ...”
34th over: England 91-4 (Taylor 24, Stokes 5)
Morkel, looking for a little reverse, runs in from the other end. Stokes dismissively leaves three balls of varying width outside the off stump before Morkel switches the ball around in his hand and swings a full, near yorker, into the off stump. Stokes deals with it, but it was a nice piece of controlled bowling. Stokes then heaves a short ball to the man at deep square leg for one.
“I too had a nice meandering start to the day - catching a leisurely 9.39 SouthEastern train to London, so it would cost me a mere £18 instead of £35 for a pre-9am train - and still getting me in half an hour before my 11am meeting,’ howls Mark Hooper from a railway line somewhere. “An hour and a half later and we’re not much closer to London, having had to reverse to the nearest station because of a broken down train in front. But fear not, just like Ben Stokes, we’ve been informed a Rescue Train is on its way!”
Rescue Train sounds like an early ‘60s soul classic.
33rd over: England 90-4 (Taylor 24, Stokes 4)
Ben Stokes takes the strike, images of his first innings heroics turning into a pile of smouldering rubble. Dane Piedt is the man attempting to make that happen at the other end. Stokes pushes a single backwards of point just to ensure it doesn’t happen in the first ball. Piedt has discovered a big crack just outside the off stump and lands the ball firmly on it, bringing Taylor down the wicket for one in order to use his feet to counteract the spin. Stokes swishes another single to the cover boundary for a final single of the over. How long do England need to bat for to make this safe? An hour? Two?
An email: “About 15 years ago one of my friends fell asleep on a train as she was making her way from Gillingham to Rainham,” writes Ed Taylor. “As any of your Medway-based readers will know, if you get on a train at Gillingham and head towards Dover and Ramsgate, Rainham is the next stop, after approximately four minutes. She woke up at Dumpton Park, on the edge of Ramsgate, with no idea where she was and not enough money to get home legally. I maintain the gods were looking kindly upon her misfortune as not only was there a train going the other way only a few minutes’ wait, but she did not encounter a ticket inspector on said train. I suppose the message here is that these things can happen to the best of us.”
Tell that to Alastair Cook, Ed.
For some further reading during the lunch break, here’s Marina Hyde on Chris Gayle. It starts with a Spinal Tap reference to boot:
And so to Chris Gayle, cricket’s Andrea Dworkin, who has found himself in trouble in Australia for being sexy. Hang on – that’s wrong. For being sexist. It is, as David St Hubbins once mused, such a fine line.
Read the whole thing here:
No team has lost a match after posting a first innings score of over 600, so good on England for having a go at breaking another record in this record-breaking Test. Still, plenty of sides have come close to losing after posting a helluva score in the first innings - the first to do it, and most satisfyingly for most England fans, were the Australians in a timeless Test in 1894. Even better, after posting 586 in the first innings, then making England follow on after they managed 325 in their first innings, Australia managed to lose the Test by 10 runs. Ooof.
There are other such fun times here (Australia, 1929, timeless), here (Australia, 1953), here (West Indies, disastrous declaration 1968), here (Australia, 2003), here (England, 2006). None of them managed 600 in the first innings though.
Morning/afternoon all. After a meandering day at work, not much on, counting time until the end of the day and flicking cards into a top hat, a friend* went out for a few quiet drinks. It was nothing special, a run of the mill couple of pints as a ho-hum, entirely predictable day eased itself into bed.
By 1am, he woke up roaring drunk on a stationary train in Littlehampton, a conductor prodding him awake and telling him it was the end of the line. He had fallen asleep somewhere around East Croydon, snoozing right through his intended stop and indeed many after that. His quiet day ended with him staring down the wrong end of a £70 taxi and a phone full of gentle, then concerned, then furious messages from his other half.
I mention this only because it’s terrifying quite how regularly the seemingly mundane and predictable turns into the screamingly alarmingly and disastrous. Good old England. Has anyone else had a day of calm meandering blown skywards by the fickle fingers of fate/incompetence? Share your pain here for the amusement of South Africans/understanding of England fans.
* Right.
LUNCH
32nd over: England 87-4 (Taylor 23, Stokes 2)
Taylor defends into the offside. Three slips and a gully stand behind him, with a short leg and catching midwicket to his left. None of them are needed as he defends and leaves well to make it through to the lunch break. We’ll be back with you in 40 minutes!
If England manage to lose this, I think Ben Stokes should be legally entitled to murder whoever he likes.
— Mark Steel (@mrmarksteel) January 6, 2016
Updated
31st over: England 87-4 (Taylor 23, Stokes 2)
Piedt to continue, presumably after drawing that top edge from Taylor, because it seems a waste of conditions to not have another seamer (Rabada?) on here. Compton’s the man to face and he’s right behind the first two. The third is horribly played: Compton works to midwicket but makes no attempt to keep the ball on the floor and chips it to the catching midwicket. First innings double-upper Ben Stokes into the attack. One over to go.
If Eng lose this they'll be the first team to lose having scored >600 in 1st innings. Beating Aus's 586ao in 1894. I think. @Vitu_E @bbctms
— David Ferguson (@daveyf) January 6, 2016
Updated
WICKET! Compton c du Plessis b Piedt 15 (England 85-4)
Poor from Compton, who does the hard yards and then plinks a straight off spinner to Faf at midwicket.
Updated
30th over: England 85-3 (Compton 15, Taylor 23)
Slack again from Taylor, who is trying to drive Morkel. The ball wasn’t full enough and he’s beaten on his inside edge. Now his outside edge is beaten. Brilliant from Morkel – nervous from Taylor. But he survives.
Lowest Test Strike-Rates since 1980 (min ave 35 & inns 20): Reid: 35.31 Compton: 35.51 < Wright: 35.85 Boycott: 36.30 #CricViz #SAvEng
— The Cricket Prof. (@CricProf) January 6, 2016
29th over: England 85-3 (Compton 15, Taylor 23)
Taylor drives and beats Hashim Amla, who is diving in vain to his left. Four more to him and England. Last ball of the over, Taylor sweeps but can only top edge, sending the ball towards the man around the corner – Bavuma – who dives and takes a blinding one-handed catch... but the ball drops out as his elbow hits the ground! What a let off for England... The lead is 87 and Morkel is back into the attack, with 12 minutes till lunch.
@vitu_e A haiku on this morning's play popped into my head-- "England wickets fall A memory of scythed grass Table Mountain roars"
— Job Senior (@Ilkleyrocks) January 6, 2016
28th over: England 80-3 (Compton 15, Taylor 18)
Tim Doyle says this needs to be turned into Oval 05 rather than Adelaide 06. I suppose the part of KP will be played by Taylor? Doable. Taylor is too keen and snatches at a pull shot. The contact is poor but he does get a single between midwicket and short leg. Hooping inswinger is kept out well. Morris whoops and puts his hands to his head, as if wronged by some intangible force. He’s called Compdog, Chris. OBO stalwart Robert Wilson is with us: “Cricket is a fairytale era of legends and dragons at the minute. Great deeds and scary stories. Which of these is most strange (and funny) of recent phenomena?
“1. Ben Stokes faces the hat-trick ball, scores the fastest 250 in history and could still lose the match?
2. 15 year old Brad Haddin fan Ranav Dhanawade knocks off a dashing but self-deprecating 1000?
3. Quite a lot of people seem to think that epic plonker, Chris Gayle knows how to behave around women?”
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27th over: England 79-3 (Compton 15, Taylor 17)
He’s had a few sighters and now, to the first ball of this Piedt over, Taylor skips down clears mid on for six! He uses his feet to the fourth ball, but only to meet it on the half volley and dab it into the legside. A juicy one, tossed up outside off stump, his flayed through cover for a brace. A wristy single down the ground gives Taylor the strike for the next over.
This is suddenly not very Adelaidey at all. One of these guys should be scoring no runs while everybody else gets out. Do it properly.
— Dan Liebke (@LiebCricket) January 6, 2016
26th over: England 70-3 (Compton 15, Taylor 8)
Extravagant bounce and movement into the batsman – but all outside off stump. Encouraging, though. And this is more the line: Morris tightens up and strikes the glove of Taylor has he goes to defend his throat. The impact is such that he drops his bat. As a result, point moves to gully and Bavuma is under the helmet. Taylor does well to see things out though, taking a single behind square leg.
25th over: England 69-3 (Compton 15, Taylor 7)
Compton goes back to a straight ball from Piedt which doesn’t bounce as expected. But the batsman is watching it all the way and works it down to fine leg for four. The rest of the over is a spin smothering affair.
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24th over: England 65-3 (Compton 11,Taylor 7)
Good over from Morris: no great pace but he’s attacking the stumps and switching to outside off stump. One moves in but starts wide enough for Compton to leave the ball comfortable. A skewed drive to midwicket is aerial for enough time to draw a “CATCH” from the South African fielders. A rushed single brings the first run in 19 balls.
23rd over: England 64-3 (Compton 10, Taylor 7)
Piedt floating them up outside off stump – Taylor easing forward into each one. Nothing particularly harmful so far.
22nd over: England 64-3 (Compton 10, Taylor 7)
Really nice looking drive from Compton, but straight to the man at mid on. An adjustment in the field for Morris, who is now without a point (so to speak).
21st over: England 64-3 (Compton 10, Taylor 7)
Mahendra Killedar can’t watch this painful trudging: “Wake me up when England is a more respectable 98-9...” Taylor times a nice two through midwicket. He seems to be happy playing Piedt off the pitch, with enough time to work to the ball to either side of the wicket.
20th over: England 62-3 (Compton 10, Taylor 5)
Morris gets Compton to uncharacteristically feel for one outside off stump. The rest, however, is played perfectly: anything on the stumps and Compton is right behind it.
Is #Adelaide trending yet?
— Nicky (@somersetbagpuss) January 6, 2016
19th over: England 62-3 (Compton 10, Taylor 5)
Off-spin from Dane Piedt, now. Floats the first one up and Compton beats short leg for one. Taylor does too, but for two, before he skews a leading edge wide of short leg and a man close in at midwicket. “Absolutely vital that England don’t go into their bunker and that they actually score at a decent strike rate for what may be a pretty short innings,” says Kevin Wilson. “At least if England do only bat out two sessions then South Africa will need to score 200 or so in a session.”
18th over: England 59-3 (Compton 9, Taylor 3)
Morris does the business with his first ball of the day. Absurd morning, thanks largely to South Africa, who have been well and truly ON IT. Drinks are taken after which Taylor hits his first ball for three through midwicket. Compton erects his brick wall for the next three deliveries, before packing it up and taking it to the other end with a single to point.
Broad's 27 off 11 balls just after lunch could be key here
— Barney Ronay (@barneyronay) January 6, 2016
WICKET! Root b Morris 29 (England 55-3)
With his first ball of the day, Morris squares up Root and takes out his off stump...
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17th over: England 55-2 (Compton 8, Root 29)
Morkel aims for the Compton’s crown, but the ball is watched all the way as Compo sways out of the way in a very Annie Are You OK manner. A series of leaves and solid blocks and the over is seen out.
16th over: England 55-2 (Compton 8, Root 29)
Richard Mansell is wondering if anyone has scored as many as England did in their first innings and gone on to lose. Anyone? Fifty up for England as Compton and Root exchange the strike. Gorgeous from Root as he times one down the ground and we forget temporarily that he’s capable of nicking off.
Funny how suddenly it's so reassuring to have Compton coming in at No.3
— Ed Kemp (@EdKempAOC) January 6, 2016
15th over: England 47-2 (Compton 7, Root 22)
PHEW! Root is caught in the slips off a Morkel delivery that surprises him off the surface. But the umpire checks the line and, after an age, it is agreed that Morkel overstepped. His misery is compounded as Root flicks him through midwicket for four and then takes an easy single into the legside.
CLOSE! Root survives after snicking behind off Morkel no-ball. England 42-2. Watch on SS2. https://t.co/rUStMDTmZu pic.twitter.com/ttWiwQE3rQ
— Sky Sports Cricket (@SkyCricket) January 6, 2016
WICKET! Root c.... NO BALL!!!
Morkel thinks he has Root caught in the slips and, when the foot lands, there is nothing behind the line!
14th over: England 41-2 (Root 17, Compton 7)
Hmmmmmm.... Root drives and misses a ball that wasn’t there for driving. Thankfully he missed it. Better judgement for the rest of the over, including a superb pull shot, which he rolls his wrists on and gets four between fine leg and square leg. “What do you think is a good target for England to set here?” asks Phil Russell. “ I’m thinking get a lead of about 200 and declare with 30 overs left then see if AB and co fancy it.” I’ll be honest, I can’t see England giving South Africa a sniff (if it was down to them).
13th over: England 36-2 (Compton 7, Root 12)
Sighs all around as Morkel finds the shoulder edge of Compton’s bat, but the ball dies and bounces just before it gets to Morris. Compton then gets himself in all sorts of trouble attempting a pull to a ball at a) isn’t short enough and b) beats him for pace. Temba Bavuma is lurking at short leg, waiting for that sort of mistake.
12th over: England 36-2 (Compton 7, Root 12)
That was a bit better – purpose and poise from Root and Compton as they exchange as the former pushes two into the legside after the latter drops one behind square for a single. An open face brings Root four between gully and third slip. Tempted from Rabada, which arcs in and then nips away, which Root leaves well alone. Two more into the covers ends the over.
11th over: England 27-2 (Compton 6, Root 4)
Root gets off the mark with a smart four to fine leg – left a couple outside off stump, Morkel searches for pads and stumps but is met by the flick of Root’s bat. Kevin Wilson emails in: “I thought at best England could be two down at lunch, now three’s the maximum. I guess they only have to bat until tea to save the game really and a lot depends on whether Piedt gets anything out of the pitch.” That’s some fine sense you’ve got going on there, Kevin. Join us in the ADELAIDE FEAR ZONE, won’t you?
Amazing what you can achieve in cricket if your fielders can catch a ball. #SAvsENG @Vitu_E
— Steve Pye (@1980sSportsBlog) January 6, 2016
10th over: England 23-2 (Compton 6, Root 0)
Rabada doing a sterling job at the other end: Compton edges low and wide of the slips for four to third man. He was squared up a touch there and is inconvenienced by one that nips back late and has Compton hopping back and across.
9th over: England 19-2 (Compton 2)
The odd one from Morkel is coming back in sharply to the right-hander – seemingly off the pitch – which will be one for Compton to look out for. He’s got three slips and no one in close on either side of the wicket. Single taken into cover. Well run. Hales gets one of those nip-back-ers and is worried enough about his decision to leave that he brings his bat through last minute. Gone soon after – he goes back to drive and gets an open face edge to second slip, where Morris takes his second one-handed speccy of the match.
@Vitu_E Adelaide is happening.
— James Wallbridge (@JimmyWallbridge) January 6, 2016
WICKET! Hales c Morris b Morkel 5 (England 19-2)
Hales is fending outside off stump – a clean edge but it still requires a brilliant diving catch by Chris Morris, to his left at second slip, to remove him!
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8th over: England 18-1 (Hales 5, Compton 5)
Rabada starts with a couple down the legside – and it’s the second that Cook tickles down the legside. That’s scores of 0, 7, 27 and 8 for him so far. Just hasn’t been able to get going. Nick Compton is subject to an LBW appeal first ball which is given not out and upheld on review. Nicely played drive into the offside gets Compton off the mark with a single.
Smashed the cover of it, did Compton.
Not out.
REVIEW!
Compton’s first ball is arcing towards him and strikes pad. There’s an appeal – not a particularly big one – but Amla decides to review after Aleem Dar gives it no out...
WICKET! Cook c de Kock b Rabada 8 (England 17-1)
Oh my! Cook goes, tickling one down the legside. Sound the alarm?
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7th over: England 17-0 (Hales 5, Cook 8)
This day – this strange, directionless day – begins with a no ball, which is left alone by Alex Hales. Michael Atherton wonders what a wrist spinner might have done on this track. Mark Butcher, on ESPNcricinfo, was wondering the same yesterday. Most of the deliveries have been innocuous, but the fifth goes in off the straight and Hales inside edges it just past his stumps.
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Robin Hazlehurst - pull yourself together!
“Permission to legitimately have The Fear now please?” Fine - granted: “This is perfectly set up for England to collapse just before tea and ABdV to knock off the chase in the evening. England could only win with a suicidal - sorry, ‘sporting’ - declaration, or a dramatic collapse followed by an even more dramatic South African one (and 20 wickets in a day on a pitch where so few have fallen would lead to suspicious glances at bookmakers).”
“As only one team can win from here, this is now South Africa’s match to lose. Why did England declare so early in the first innings?”
I know. Typical gambling Cook. We should be celebrating/casting a dubious eye over two scores of a 1,000 this week...
Morning, morning: Vish here to begin you on this quest to handshakes at dusk.
I doubt this was the climax that we envisaged when Ben Stokes and Jonny Bairstow were making ginger sexy again, but here we are: England with a second innings lead of 18, presumably a long way away from getting far enough ahead to have a crack at South Africa, on this batsman’s wet dream of a pitch.
Before we get underway, some recommended reading from Ali Martin and Mike Selvey:
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Vitushan will be here shortly to take you through the morning’s play on the final day of the second Test.
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