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The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Sport
Rob Smyth (earlier) and Vithushan Ehantharajah (now)

South Africa v England: first ODI – as it happened

Moeen Ali celebrates with team-mates after dismissing Rilee Rossouw of South Africa.
Moeen Ali celebrates with team-mates after dismissing Rilee Rossouw of South Africa. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

The two teams will move on to Port Elizabeth for the second ODI, which takes place on Saturday. We’ll be with you then. Remember, it’s a 10am local start – so 08:00 GMT.

That’s all from me. BYE!


ENGLAND WIN BY 39 RUNS (DLS)!

The umpires have called it and England have won the first of this five match ODI series. Jos Buttler’s 105 was the undoubted highlight of England’s push to 399 but Quinton de Kock was looking to usurp Buttler with a century of his own.

As it happens, de Kock will have to take solace in a neat red-inker of 138.

Nothing official as of yet but it does look like that is that.

The rain had stopped and there was hope that they’d be able to get something in before the 20:18 cut-off time. But the heavens have opened again and, given the amount of water that has fallen, the umpires may stick a fork in this one...

They’ve not mentioned it... but well-sauced spectators are using the covers as a slip ‘n slide...

THE SCENE

We have an hour to play with, after which point we will start to lose overs. The rain has got much heavier though we’re assured by the local commentators that the storms can be brief in this part of the world.

RAIN STOPS PLAY (South Africa 250-5)

Just as Behardien nails Jordan through the covers for four, the umpires have told the players to make way for the covers as the rain finally starts to fall. Par DL at the end of the 34th over is 290 (for four).

Quinton de Kock and Farhaan Behardien leave the pitch.
Quinton de Kock and Farhaan Behardien leave the pitch ... Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images
Field marshalls run to cover the pitch as rain stops play.
As the field marshalls run on to cover the pitch as rain stops play.
One of the umpires keeps an eye as the covers go on as rain stops play.
One of the umpires keeps an eye on things from under an umbrella. Photograph: Gianluigi Guercia/AFP/Getty Images

Updated

33rd over: South Africa 245-5 (de Kock 137)

Quality from Moeen Ali. Just two runs off the over – singles to both Rossouw and de Kock, before Rossouw chips to David Willey. The key here was Ali’s length, which he varied to ensure neither batsmen could get him away through the infield with ease.

WICKET! Rossouw c Willey b Ali (South Africa 245-5)

A bit of pressure and Rossouw tries to manufacture a boundary into the off side. He doesn’t quite get to the pitch of the ball and ends up skewing high towards David Willey skipping in from the long off boundary, who takes a simple catch.

32nd over: South Africa 243-4 (de Kock 136, Rossouw 18)

24 behind DLS and another boundary to start the over – Rossouw threads Jordan through cover for four. But the last five are spot on: dropping his pace and mixing up his length to ensure only four more are scored.

31st over: South Africa 236-4 (de Kock 135, Rossouw 12)

With South Africa 33 behind on DLS, de Kock thumps the first ball of the over for six! After an exchange of the strike, de Kock then hammers Stokes through square leg for four! The last ball is hit into the ground back to Stokes, who picks up the ball and hurls it, on the bounce, past de Kock and through to Buttler. It’s ticking out there...

30th over: South Africa 223-4 (de Kock 124, Rossouw 11)

Big show of faith here as Morgan brings Chris Jordan back into the attack. His first three overs went for 35 but his first ball here is a dot. The second isn’t, though, as de Kock finesses one around the corner for four. And again, in the same region, albeit with a bit more wrist in the shot. Nine from the over.

de Kock on the attack.
de Kock on the attack. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

Updated

29th over: South Africa 214-4 (de Kock 115, Rossouw 11)

A sharp single and de Kock is hobbling to the nonstriker’s end. After each of the three singles off the over, he’s stretching out his hamstring. Rossouw decides to do him a favour and hit Stokes over his head for four. No need to run for that.

186 required from 21 overs

28th over: South Africa 207-4 (de Kock 113, Rossouw 6)

Not sure if de Kock’s tiring – understandable if he is – but the boundaries haven’t been coming as easily. In Rossouw he has someone who can give it some welly and, oh look, there he goes – forcing a ball back past Reece Topley for four – messing up what was a fairly tidy over.

27th over: South Africa 199-4 (de Kock 110, Rossouw 1)

A sharp bouncing delivery off a length greets Rilee Rossouw, leading him to flinch as the ball threatens to take a digit. A single to midwicket gets him off the mark but there are only two from the over. The required run rate is now 8.73

26th over: South Africa 197-4 (de Kock 109)

Sublime from de Kock, who just has to keep going and not think about the elements or what is happening at the other end. As soon as Topley tries to push one through, he just steps across and thumps him over midwicket for six. Duminy’s innings then comes to a tame end.

WICKET! Duminy c&b Topley 13 (South Africa 197-4)

Duminy is undone by a slower ball. He tries to pull out of the shot but only plinks it back to the bowler who takes a simple return catch.

Topley celebrates catching out Duminyof his own bowling.
Topley celebrates catching out Duminyof his own bowling. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

Updated

25th over: South Africa 188-3 (de Kock 101, Duminy 12)

De Kock again takes a single off the first ball from Stokes. But he has it back four balls later to pick a full toss off his legs for his century! Brilliant from the opener – it’s his ninth ODI hundred, from just 67 deliveries. Nine fours and four sixes.

de Kock brings up his century.
de Kock brings up his century. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

South Africa require 212 from the final 25 overs.

Updated

24th over: South Africa (de Kock 95, Duminy 11)

Good move from Morgan who brings Reece Topley back into the attack and he, too, is running his fingers over the ball and making sure it arrives at the other end later than expected. Just four from the over – two singles apiece for the batsmen.

23rd over: South Africa 177-3 (de Kock 93, Duminy 9)

Man of the moment/our lifetime is into the attack: de Kock gets him away first ball for a single but it’s only to the final ball that the next run comes, as Duminy keeps the strike. A good start from Stokes, who bowled a fair few cutters that over.

Updated

22nd over: South Africa 175-3 (de Kock 92, Duminy 8)

A huge six by de Kock. He’s not giving this up. If they get a full game then it’ll be a close run thing. If it’s down to DLS, then the goose is cooked. England might know that as they go for an optimistic review for LBW which takes a bit of time out of the game.

Right, you might want to sit down before watching this...

21st over: South Africa 166-3 (de Kock 83, Duminy 8)

A big over for South Africa as Rashid has trouble gripping the ball and is swept hard by Duminy for four. Bit of luck for de Kock as he nutmegs himself for another four.

Updated

20th over: South Africa 154-3 (de Kock 78, Duminy 1)

Ben Stokes though.

Updated

WICKET! de Villiers c Stokes b Ali 8 (South Africa 151-3)

I can’t believe what I’ve just seen. De Villiers has hit a six over wide mid on. Yet it seems to have ended up in the hand of Ben Stokes, who jumped about 15-feet in the air and 30 feet to his right. I mean, it must have been a six. It was definitely a six. AB de Villiers is walking off because it’s six, right? Come back on AB de Villiers, and carry on playing.

Stokes is mobbed by teammates after catching de Villiers.
Stokes is mobbed by teammates after catching de Villiers. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

Updated

19th over: South Africa 147-2 (de Kock 77, de Villiers 4)

Just so you know, we need 20 overs in this innings for a game. The par score at the time is 169-2, meaning South Africa need 170, without losing another wicket. That’ll explain why they went hell for leather against Rashid and, thanks to four leg byes, take 14 from the over.

Updated

18th over: South Africa 133-2 (de Kock 68, de Villiers 3)

Spectators are running for cover as the trees shake dramatically beyond the stands and the rain contemplates engulfing the ground. Quinton de Kock keeps doing what he’s been doing and plants Ali for six, with the help of the gale blowing across the ground.

17th over: South Africa 124-2 (de Kock 61, de Villiers 1)

AB de Villiers gets huge ovation as the crowd. With three ducks behind him, he takes a single off his inside edge to end that horror run. Flatter over from Rashid means just three runs are taken. The wind is really picking up out there.

16th over: South Africa 121-2 (de Kock 59)

That’s a biggie from de Kock, as he sweeps hard and behind leg for six! The over ends on a high note for the tourists as du Plessis holes out to Hales.

WICKET! du Plessis c Hales b Ali 55 (South Africa 121-2)

HUGE! Du Plessis looks to deposit Ali over the fence but only finds Alex Hales, who takes a neat catch just inside of it.

Ali celebrates dismissing du Plessis for 55.
Ali celebrates dismissing du Plessis for 55. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

Updated

15th over: South Africa 111-1 (de Kock 52, du Plessis 52)

Runs off each of the first five balls as de Kock and du Plessis use their crease to go back and forth and work either side of the wicket.

de Kock brings up his 50.
de Kock brings up his 50. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

Updated

14th over: South Africa 105-1 (de Kock 48, du Plessis 50)

After going 3-0-35-0, Chris Jordan is pulled from the attack for Moeen Ali. That doesn’t stem the runs though, as du Plessis pierces cover for four. He’s given out at the end of the over and then turns it around. Much like South Africa are doing...

NOT OUT!

Amazing! It look so very out, especially after any bat had been ruled out. Turns out the ball was turning past leg stump...

REVIEW...

Moeen Ali strikes du Plessis in front and the umpire says it’s OUT. However, Faf, after some discussion, reviews the decision...

13th over: South Africa 98-1 (de Kock 46, du Plessis 45)

Rashid turns the first three balls into de Kock. By the third, the opener has cottoned on and skips down to hit the leg spinner inside out over cover. Brilliant work by David Willey ensures the ball doesn’t reach the rope. When the googly comes the ball after, de Kock readjusts his feet to hit square for another two.

12th over: South Africa 93-1 (de Kock 41, du Plessis 45)

Chris Jordan, unaided by the pitch or conditions, is being taken to the cleaners. Having gone for 20 off his first two overs, his third starts with a four through midwicket: de Kock trusting the bounce of the ball (back of a length, too) to punch the ball off the back foot. A short ball is thwacked in the same region and the over ends with a patented du Plessis charge and larrup for a third boundary of an expensive over.

11th over: South Africa 78-1 (de Kock 31, du Plessis 40)

Adil Rashid. King of the Big Bash. Rash. The Big Rash... anyway, him, he’s on and the second ball is cut fine for four. A few wrong-uns, mostly right ones and that’s six from his first over.

10th over: South Africa 72-1 (de Kock 26, du Plessis 39)

Jordan, over the wicket to the left-handed de Kock, larrups the ball off his hip for four. Two singles and a two, and that’s your Power Play. Barring the wicket of Amla, it’s been a fine start from the hosts. But, importantly...

9th over: South Africa 64-1 (de Kock 21, du Plessis 36)

Two dot balls, a lingering shot of the clouds and then du Plessis goes BANG! Starts with his feet, charging Willey, and nearly takes his head off with a flat four. Then nearly puts his neck out with a huge six that has the bowler whipping his neck back in an instance to follow the trajectory of the ball to the roof behind him.

du Plessis hits one.
du Plessis hits one. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

Updated

8th over: South Africa 54-1 (de Kock 21, du Plessis 26)

A bowling change, as Chris Jordan comes in for Topley, who is called into action almost immediately to brilliantly save three runs on the square leg fence. Two fours to square leg – from du Plessis and de Kock – make it a pretty horrible back three for Jordan.

7th over: South Africa 42-1 (de Kock 14, du Plessis 21)

Good from Willey, who concedes just four from the over.

6th over: South Africa 38-1 (de Kock 13, du Plessis 18)

Looks like both these bats are targeting Topley. It’s nothing particularly barbaric: an attempted thump over the top is plinked beyond Alex Hales at mid off for two. Topley is then helped around the corner for four. Buttler puts in a dive that nearly claws it in but it would have been something of the incredible, and we know he’s not capable of anything like that.

Updated

5th over: South Africa 30-1 (de Kock 12, du Plessis 11)

Great timing from du Plessis, tucking Willey off his pads for four in a very straight line through square leg. The man really can bat as good as he looks. An email, from grown up France: “Puerile I know but the TMS guys can barely contain themselves about Willey to de Kock,” writes an Adam Levine not of Maroon 5. “Being receptive to a bit scatological humour myself, it’s hard to explain to my French co-workers why I’m giggling like a schoolgirl. They don’t really get a) cricket or b) Willey jokes.” Massive LBW candidates, that lot.

4th over: South Africa 22-1 (de Kock 10, du Plessis 6)

A fine straight drive from de Kock has the sting taken out of it by a diving Alex Hales, who saves two runs. Topley varies his length, so de Kock and du Plessis settle singles until Topley is full, straight and punched down the ground by du Plessis for four.

Updated

3rd over: South Africa 13-1 (de Kock 6, du Plessis 1)

Faf du Plessis is your man in at number three. Most, if not all of Faf’s best work has come from first drop. While the recent Test form is dire, he’s coming off the back of an impressive ODI tour of India with 323 runs at just over 80. Just two runs and the wicket of Amla from the over.

WICKET! Amla b Willey 6 (South Africa 11-1)

Willey goes across Amla and, much like the first delivery of the innings, it keeps low. But Amla has already committed to the drive and edges onto his own stumps.

England celebrates the dismissal of Amla
England celebrates the dismissal of Amla Photograph: Gianluigi Guercia/AFP/Getty Images

Updated

2nd over: South Africa 11-0 (de Kock 5, Amla 6)

All left for England with Reece Topley taking the other new ball. He’s full and outside off stump, so Amla angles his bat to effectively deflect the ball behind point and inside third man for four.

1st over: South Africa 6-0 (de Kock 5, Amla 1)

David Willey gets us going with a ball that scoots low outside off stump, which Quinton de Kock swings over the top of. The next ball is punched for four through backward point: bit of width but de Kock doesn’t try and overhit the ball. A fine leg for a single to bring Hashim Amla on strike. He tries to leave his first ball but ends up toeing the ball down into the turf just in front of Buttler. Amla off the a shot into the ground that point manages to tip over the bar. Corner.

Afternoon all. Now then, wasn’t that fun?

While Rob lies down, I (Vish), will do my level best to rain on this parade as South Africa get off to a great start and I’m forced to show you all the various “at this stage” stats from other big chases and, together, we grow to learn that bigger isn’t always better. Sometimes, it’s bitterly disappointing.

Here’s *that* scorecard. The question, as ever, is who will be England’s Mick Lewis?

Updated

INNINGS BREAK

Just another boring England ODI, eh. England made 399 for nine, with Jos Buttler celebrating an apparently permanent promotion to No4 with another wonderful hundred. I’m off for a lie down; Vish will be here for the second innings. Bye!

SOUTH AFRICA NEED 400 TO WIN

50th over: England 399-9 (Willey 5, Topley 0) This is a new England record for most sixes in an ODI innings. They’ve hit 15. They are going to make 400 as well. A hideous leg-side, head-height full toss from de Lange slips away for five wides. Willey takes them to 399, which gives Topley – a Chas ‘n’ Dave batsman – two balls to get a single and take England to 400. He fails to get bat on either. What a desperate anti-climax.

WICKET! England 391-9 (Jordan c Duminy b de Lange 14)

Jordan hits de Lange’s first ball for six – it was caught by Behardien but his momentum took him over the rope – and falls to the second, smearing it miles in the over. Four balls remaining.

49th over: England 385-8 (Jordan 9, Willey 2) Jordan and Willey beg, steal and borrow a few ones and twos to push England to 385. Perhaps the daftest thing of all is that even that isn’t safe for England. Nothing is safe here, Dude. Come on, you’re being very un-English. They’ll chase 400.

WICKET! England 379-8 (Rashid b Morris 2)

Textbook stuff from Morris, who slips an immaculate inswinging yorker into the base of Rashid’s middle stump.

Updated

48th over: England 379-7 (Jordan 4, Rashid 2) Two overs to go, 21 needed for 400.

Updated

WICKET! England 376-7 (Moeen c Morris b Tahir 19)

England aren’t going to reach 400. Moeen drags Tahir straight to deep midwicket, where Morris takes an easy catch.

47th over: England 375-6 (Moeen 19, Jordan 2) Chris Jordan is in ahead of Adil Rashid. “Afternoon Rob,” says Simon McMahon. “Sentences I never thought I’d send to the OBO during an ODI, No. 1 - England will be disappointed if they don’t reach 400.”

Have the last nine months been some kind of elaborate wind-up?

WICKET! England 371-6 (Stokes b Morris 57)

This is the highest score on this ground and England’s highest score overseas. They could still beat the 408 they made against New Zealand last summer. Correction: they will beat the 408 they made last summer. This is a massacre! Stokes drives Morris for four to bring up a 36-ball fifty, then swipes the next ball high over midwicket for six.

I can’t keep up with this. Stokes has gone now. He telegraphed his intention to ramp a low full toss from Morris, missed and was bowled That’s the end of his most Stokes-like ODI innings to date: 57 from 36 balls, with four fours and three sixes.

tokes reacts after being bowled for 57.
tokes reacts after being bowled for 57. Photograph: Themba Hadebe/AP

Updated

46th over: England 361-5 (Stokes 47, Moeen 18) Stokes hoicks Tahir for consecutive sixes, the second even though he slipped as he played the shot. Moeen them slams another four to make it 19 from the over. These a one-day internationals anymore; they are Fifty50 matches, just an extended T20 contest.

Stokes hits out for six.
Stokes hits out for six. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

“It heartens me that we still talk of That Adelaide Test in hushed tones and embarassed camaraderie,” says David Jarman. “I was there and had a lovely time at the ground on days three and four, then shared in the collective English paralysis as the fifth day worked itself out. Suddenly the veil was lifted from our eyes: of course Warne was going to run through the pride of England! With an hour or so to go, I turned to my Australian friends and quietly informed them I was going to seek solace with the Barmy Army, and that I might be some time. The further back in time that day recedes, the more majesty those events accrue. (The Charge of Light Brigade, anyone?).” Yes, I have rather fond memories of Adelaide. Occasionally, between the screams. It was the most magical trauma.

Updated

45th over: England 342-5 (Stokes 29, Moeen 13) Marchant de Lange starts his new spell with a short ball of almost offensive brainlessness to Moeen Ali, who responds in the appropriate manner by pulling a huge six. They can’t find the ball, in fact. He pulls it back really well after that, with just four from the rest of the over.

That’s sacrilege. Buttler is much better, certainly in ODIs. (And KP was most effective at No5 in ODIs, where he averaged 117, but that’s another story.) But I agree that they should consider playing him just as a batsman in Tests. It’s tricky, though, for a number of reasons.

44th over: England 332-5 (Stokes 29, Moeen 6) Morris’s throw hits the bat of Stokes and deflects for four, the highlight of an 11-run over from Morkel. England are cruising towards their highest ODI score overseas, which they made in the last game of the Pakistan series.

“Apparently the cricket commentary isn’t a democratic listening choice in the office,” says Liz Rippin. “I wish I was still sitting around the house in a dressing gown ‘freelancing’.”

43rd over: England 321-5 (Stokes 22, Moeen 4) Moeen is more suited to opening in one-day cricket and batting down the order in Tests, but there are worse people to have coming in at No7 in one-day cricket. He drives his third ball classily for four.

“Amazingly this is Buttler’s slowest hundred at 73 balls!” says Shankar Mony. “Also the first time he is not breaking the England record for fastest 100!”

Updated

WICKET! England 317-5 (Buttler c de Villiers b Behardien 105)

Buttler’s masterpiece is over. He tried to lift Behardien over extra cover but didn’t get enough on it and de Villiers backpedalled to take a good leaping catch. Buttler made 105 from 76 balls. So in two innings at No4 he has an average of 230 and a strike rate of 174. I don’t think we’ll see him batting anywhere else for a while.

BUTTLER REACHES AN AWESOME CENTURY!

42nd over: England 316-4 (Buttler 105, Stokes 21) Jos Buttler reaches his century, a relatively sedate 73-ball effort, by cutting Morkel for two. What a performance! It’s his second consecutive century, both made at No4, and Morgan and Bayliss deserve a lot of credit for promoting him. It’s been another awesome demonstration of an unprecedented English talent, with 10 fours and five sixes.

Make that 11 fours: the next ball is ramped from way outside off stump for four. Imagine being so good that you can make a relatively sedate century from 73 balls.

“I had the pleasure of flight from Bahrain to Sydney in early December 2006,” says Patrick Murphy. “Imagine the pain as I turned on my phone to receive a series of text updates from my brother on the progress in Adelaide…”

In a strange way, most people had the same experience - everybody went to bed expecting a bore draw and woke up to the news that the world had ended while they were asleep.

Buttler brings up his century.
Buttler brings up his century. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

Updated

41st over: England 305-4 (Buttler 95, Stokes 20) De Villiers is trying to sneak through the remaining fifth-bowler overs, with Behardien coming into the attack. Stokes pulls viciously for four to bring up the 300. The 300. In the 41st over. For a team called ‘England’.

“I love how Jos never ramps any more,” says Phil Harrison. “It’s like he can’t be arsed with it now, like it’s beneath him...”

Give it time...

40th over: England 297-4 (Buttler 92, Stokes 15) These are the highest strike-rates in England’s ODI history. Buttler, unsurprisingly, is out on his own. Jazzer Fleming was ahead of his time.

In other news, that’s a boundaryless over from de Lange. Send ‘em home.

Updated

39th over: England 292-4 (Buttler 90, Stokes 13) JP Duminy replaces Tahir. Buttler says hello by reverse-sweeping his first delivery for four, and then by making room to drive effortlessly over extra cover for four. The underhit six is becoming Buttler’s trademark – and he produces another next ball with a sweetly timed chip over midwicket. That’s his fifth six. This is awesome batting.

“I’m a bit sad that the ritual of waiting for phone signal when the plane lands so you can furtively check the cricket score have passed,” says Charlie Tinsley. “Especially trying to avoid the gaze of stewards who think that the scorecard somehow interferes with the taxiing plane’s fragile navigation hardware. It used to be like opening a box to check on Schroedinger’s cat. Though as an England fan following ODIs you pretty much knew there’d be feline putrescence.”

Heh, indeed. Imagine the people who were flying on the morning of August 7, 2005, and their faces as they tried to piece together what had happened.

Updated

38th over: England 274-4 (Buttler 73, Stokes 12) Marchant de Lange returns to the attack. That will please Stokes, who likes pace on the ball.. I’d have tried to use up some of the Duminy/Behardien overs here. Stokes hits consecutive boundaries with a drive so fierce that it beats the cover sweeper and a steered pull.

He never did another You Get What You Give, did he?

37th over: England 266-4 (Buttler 73, Stokes 4) Tahir has been South Africa’s most economical bowler today, in the face of almost no competition. A good over to Stokes, who hasn’t settled yet, costs just four.

36th over: England 263-4 (Buttler 73, Stokes 1) Buttler makes room to glide Morkel for another boundary. His new partner is Ben Stokes, who thus far has had the opposite problem to Buttler and Hales – how to transfer his Test batting to one-day cricket.

35th over: England 256-4 (Buttler 69, Stokes 0) Behardien almost takes a staggering catch to get rid of Buttler. He carted Tahir towards deep square leg, where the sprinting Behardien dived full length, both feet miles off the ground, and took the catch with his left hand. Only when he landed did the ball bounce out. “That would have been the catch of the century,” says Mikey Holding, who doesn’t really do hyperbole. That was insanely good.

“I’m following your updates from 30,000 feet up in the skies over the North Sea, thanks to the curse magic of mid-air wifi,” says Martin Wright. “Half expecting to see a thunderbolt from Buttler’s bat soaring through the cumulus…”

Instant gratification, even at 30,000 feet. Where does it end? It can’t be long before there’s a brawl in M&S because the contactless isn’t working.

Updated

WICKET! England 256-4 (Morgan c Morkel b Tahir 23)

Morgan swings Tahir for six but falls later in the over, screwing a drive to Morkel running in from long off. He made 23 from 21 balls.

34th over: England 248-3 (Buttler 67, Morgan 16) A good over from Morkel, just three from it.

Have England really done it 41 times? Crikey. It felt like it used to happen once a decade when I was growing up.

33rd over: England 245-3 (Buttler 66, Morgan 14) Morgan laps Tahir for four and then reverse sweeps another over point. Fours are the new singles. It’s hard work, this; I might start only describing the sixes.

Updated

32nd over: England 235-3 (Buttler 65, Morgan 5) There’s a bit of reverse swing for Morris, which might kibosh England’s hopes of reaching 1000. Morgan, after a few sighters, charges Morris and uses his Popeye forearms to power the ball over mid-off for four. The last three overs have brought only 12 runs, however, which is a minor triumph for South Africa. Time for drinks.

Updated

31st over: England 230-3 (Buttler 64, Morgan 1) Imran Tahir returns to the attack, although really, given the nature of one-day cricket these days, it should be called the bowling defence. Tahir does a good job, conceding just three.

“Struggling to find a bookmaker offering odds on 900+ runs in the day,” says Kimberley Thonger. “Any ideas?” Luton High Street?

Here’s Kimberley again. “As a back up I’ve put a tenner on England 250 all out.”

30th over: England 227-3 (Buttler 62) Now, on today of all days, let’s celebrate some of England’s slowest one-day innings: 12 from 68 balls! 20 from 88! 44 from 147!

“You’re almost certainly right that England won’t score 500 in this innings,” says Steve Hudson. “But if the rule of thumb is that you predict the final score by doubling the 30-over score, are England going to fall that short? It depends very much on the number of wickets they lose in the next 15 overs.” I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Leicester could win the Premier League and England could actually score 500 today. They should certainly make their highest ODI score.

WICKET! England 227-3 (Root b Morris 52)

Root goes, dragging on a good full-length inswinger from Morris. He played really well for 52 from 57 balls.

Morris celebrates after bowling Root for 52.
Morris celebrates after bowling Root for 52. Photograph: Themba Hadebe/AP

Updated

29th over: England 223-2 (Root 51, Buttler 60) Root brings up an outstanding fifty, masterful and controlled, by leaning back to back cut Morkel for four. The modern anchor goes at almost a run a ball, and Root’s fifty has taken just 51 deliveries here. Buttler continues the slaughter with a lovely drive over extra cover for four.

Root brings up his 50.
Root brings up his 50. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

“At times like these, it particularly breaks my heart that cricket isn’t on free-to-air telly anymore,” says Phil Harrison. “Can you imagine the youngsters who’d be brought to cricket by watching Jos Buttler. A genius in a gated community.” Yeah, never mind clearing bars – Buttler could clear classrooms, with kids inventing an illness so they can get home.

Updated

28th over: England 213-2 (Root 46, Buttler 55) Another escape for Buttler, who toe-ends a hoick off Behardien into the offside, with the ball landing short of the cover ring. As Shaun Pollock says, he made his own luck there – the fielders were deeper than usual because of the earlier boundaries. A no-ball means a free hit, and Buttler is bowled by Behardien via inside edge and pad. An eventful over continues with a short ball that is pulled for six by Joe Root. At this stage England aren’t on course for 400; they’re on course for 450.

“In case anyone was wondering about the top ODI scores, here they are,” says my Personal Stats Assistant Tony Cunningham. “I’m going to tempt fate and say we’ll get onto that list by a good few runs.”

27th over: England 202-2 (Root 38, Buttler 53) Buttler walks across to time Morkel through midwicket for four, bringing up an effortless and wonderful fifty from 34 balls. His last 48 runs have come from 21 deliveries.

Good point. Hand speed is one of the most underappreciated things in cricket.

26th over: England 197-2 (Root 38, Buttler 48) Buttler is too early on a work to leg and loops the ball back to the bowler Behardien, who can’t quite take the catch as he tumbles forward. Just six from the over, with no boundaries. Send ‘em home.

25th over: England 191-2 (Root 36, Buttler 44) AB de Villiers turns to Morne Morkel, knowing that if he doesn’t get Buttler soon this could become X-rated. Root is playing the modern anchor role at No3 – 36 from 44 balls – and he opens the face to steer a boundary to third man.

“Has 500 ever been done in a first class 50 over game?” just asks Dean Kinsella. “Just askin’, like.” Nup. This Surrey special is the highest. England won’t get 500 today, obvs, but it will happen in an ODI before the end of the decade.

BREAKING NEWS: GENIUS AT WORK

24th over: England 185-2 (Root 31, Buttler 44) The part-time medium-pacer Farhaan Behardien is coming into the attack. Buttler pummels him for three consecutive boundaries: a slice to third man, a chip down the ground and a ping through the covers. This is staggering batting. He’s playing Stick Cricket in a 50-over match. He has 44 from 27, and that includes 40 from the last 14.

Buttler’s smashing it all over the park.
Buttler’s smashing it all over the park. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

“I bought Sleeper’s “The It Girl” album on CD at the weekend from Poundland,” says Elliot Carr-Barnsley, unwittingly revealing his preferred chat-up line. “It’s not the only copy of it I own. I also tried to book Louise Wener for a documentary I made at university. I failed, but did manage to land Glenda Jackson.”

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23rd over: England 170-2 (Root 29, Buttler 31) Duminy replaces Tahir, who was bullied for 23 from four overs. He goes around the wicket to Buttler, who mauls a short ball over midwicket for his third six. This is awesome. The next delivery is reverse swept for four more, and Buttler has 31 from 23 balls – including 27 from the last 10.

22nd over: England 159-2 (Root 28, Buttler 21) Thanks for all the emails. I’m struggling to keep up, because I am past retirement age, but they’re all appreciated. Buttler is into his work now: he helps de Lange round the corner for four and then walks across the stumps to drive an outrageous six over long on. That was laughably good, or at least chucklably good.

“Unless I’m very mistaken (clue: I’m not), Buttler was also shunted up the order from 6 to 4 on a whim when he scored that phenomenomenal century during the last ODI, in Dubai – leapfrogged over Morgan and Taylor that day,” says Kieron Shaw. “And we know what happened then. (Probably not what’s going to happen now.)” Yeah he was, but that was in the 36th over. This is different and feels like a permanent move.

Updated

21st over: England 146-2 (Root 26, Buttler 10) We’re into the middle overs, where singles predominate, though I’m not sure we can call them boring anymore. Especially with Buttler at the crease. After making four from 13 balls, he walks down to Tahir and drives a glorious six over long-off. He has this fascinating ability to underhit the ball for a straight six. The word is overused, by me in particular, but Jos Buttler secrets genius.

In other news, here’s Guy Hornsby: “1990 was a ‘golden’ year for cricket masochism, wasn’t it? I remember that Windies capitulation because it was the new dawn of Curtleyville, just when we thought their 80s fire was finally snuffed out. How wrong we bloody were. But that Melbourne match is something to behold. Bruce Reid, the brittle maestro, a little like a permanently-injured proto-Broad. When he was hot he was very hot, but mostly he was warm from Deep Heat on the physio’s bench, poor bloke. God knows what that innings would’ve looked like without Wayne Larkins. And you don’t get to say that often.”

I’d forgotten just how good Reid was. Bob Simpson, who was Australia coach around then, says they would have been world No1 years earlier had he stayed fit. Imagine an attack in the early-to-mid-90s of Reid, McDermott, McGrath and Warne! Dan Brettig did a lovely piece on Reid here.

20th over: England 138-2 (Root 25, Buttler 3) This is a big change for Buttler, to be in before the 20th over, never mind the 30th over, but it’s a sensible long-term move. There has never been an England one-day cricketer with his ability, and he could – could – become our de Villiers at No4. We MUST should be patient if it takes him a little while to adjust, though, as it’s a pretty different role. He’s playing himself in here, content to shoulder arms to one delivery from de Lange and take just a single off the final ball.

Heh. Thing is, it doesn’t necessarily disprove the argument. Same with England picking Geraint Jones in 2006-07. He failed badly but that doesn’t mean the decision was the wrong one. I’ll give a bunch of five to any man who says otherwise.

Updated

19th over: England 137-2 (Root 25, Buttler 2) Root, Buttler, Morgan, Stokes. On a good day, good luck bowling to that.

Updated

18th over: England 134-2 (Root 24, Buttler 0) Well this is interesting: Jos Buttler has been promoted to No4. That’s the first time England have done that so early in an innings, which makes you think it’s a long-term plan – a reward for that preposterous hundred against Pakistan in the last ODI.

“Forgive me for getting carried away,” says Krishnan Patel. “But there is something mid-noughties-Invincible-Aussie feel about this team. That settled opening combination like Hayden and Gilchrist. And that sight of Root (like Ponting) walking in at three after the first break through. Perhaps, if we let Broad do the McGrath role and find a Lee, we have a world-beating team in our hands.”

No. I mean I wish there was, and there might be in a couple of years, but no. No. They have enormous potential, but then so did that fella with the hat from the New Radicals.

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WICKET! England 130-2 (Hales c de Villiers b de Lange 57)

De Lange strikes in the first over of a new spell. Hales tried to drive down the ground but screwed it high to mid-off, where de Villiers took a simple catch. That was a good and important knock from Hales: 57 from 47 balls with six fours and two sixes. He’ll sleep well tonight.

De Lange celebrates dismissing Hales.
De Lange celebrates dismissing Hales. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

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17th over: England 129-1 (Hales 57, Root 19) Hales charges the new bowler Duminy and drives a sweet six down the ground. The umpires decide to take a drinks break while flunkies retrieve the ball. England are going beautifully, although it’s hard to know what score they need. They will want as much De Villiers insurance as possible.

16th over: England 121-1 (Hales 50, Root 18) A piece of filth from Morris is pulled for six by Hales, who then gets a single brings up a superb fifty from 40 balls. That includes 28 from the last 14 balls. There are significant doubts over his Test career, of course there are, but he’s too good to write off just yet.

Hales smashes for six.
Hales smashes for six. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

Updated

15th over: England 112-1 (Hales 42, Root 17) A wide half-volley from Tahir is muscled to the cover boundary by Hales, who as usual is moving through the gears as the innings progresses. He scored 22 from his first 26 balls and has 20 from the last 10.

“Can I be the first to say that I thoroughly disagree with England’s new, success-based approach?” sniffs David Hopkins. “Back in the good old days we’d have given up on the game by now, and would be spending our OBO time more profitably by discussing female-fronted 90s indie bands or something. Emma Pollock of lo-fi titans the Delgados has an album out this week, for example...” I assume you’ll be at this on Saturday, then? Wearing this maybe?

14th over: England 106-1 (Hales 38, Root 15) Morris back, in place of Morkel, picks up where he left off in his first spell by serving up a buffet of tripe and pies. Hales belts a pull through midwicket for four.

“If Buttler performs to potential here (given that Bairstow isn’t in the side - another illustration of England’s current strength in depth) surely there’s a case for a Test middle order of 4. Root 5. Bairstow 6. Stokes 7. Buttler?” says Rich Graveling. “There are concerns about Jonny’s keeping, where Buttler maybe has the edge.”

Yeah that will probably happen at some stage this summer, with either Taylor or Root going to No3. A lot depends on what they do with Root, as Taylor might be a place too high at No3. But do you risk moving Root from a position where he has been so productive? There’s no logical reason why he shouldn’t do the same at No3, but there was no logical reason why Michael Clarke’s average should have halved when he went from No5 to No4.

13th over: England 99-1 (Hales 32, Root 14) Imran Tahir comes into the attack. He has an exceptional one-day record, with 84 wickets at 23 and an economy rate under four and a half. You do expect bad balls from him, mind, and his third delivery is way too short. Root pulls it easily for four.

Root knocks one for four.
Root knocks one for four. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

“On throwing Jason Roy’s cap into the ring of the ludicrous circus that is England’s opening test pair, he doesn’t actually open for Surrey in the four-day lark (classic one-day opener/ four-day dasher at number 6 paradigm),” says Alex Bramble. “That said, Bayliss strikes me as being more of the Fletcher-esque gut-feeling school of selection, so if he likes what he sees, why not? I entirely agree with you that throughout his one-day career so far he’s looked considerably better than Hales, but like Hales, he probably needs to tighten up outside his off stump to avoid being blighted by the exact type of naysaying that’s currently dogging Hales’ attempts to convince as a Test opener.”

I know Warner is a far better player than Hales and Roy, an authentic genius, but it’s interesting to wonder how his career would have played out had he been born in England.

Updated

12th over: England 93-1 (Hales 31, Root 8) Morkel isn’t actually bowling that well, with too much on leg stump, but his status is such that England aren’t going after him as they did Morris and de Lange. The moment I type that, of course, Hales blitzes him disdainfully over mid-off for four. Then he chips four more over midwicket. What we’re dealing with her is a total lack of respect for the bowling. Hales is playing really nicely and has 31 from 30 balls.

“Re: The WC final of 1979,” begins Elliot Carr-Barnsley. “Let us never forget the day we lost eight wickets for 11 runs. Has anyone ever curated a collection of England’s greatest collapses?”

As you asked so nicely, I knocked this out for you between overs. It could, of course, have been a Joy of Six Hundred.

11th over: England 83-1 (Hales 22, Root 8) No boundaries in Duminy’s over, but England do manage to score off every ball: five singles and then an underedge for three from Root.

“Admittedly, SA have been godawful so far,” says Phil Harrison. “But isn’t it amazing to watch this England team play ODIs? Don’t have much to add beyond that but we shouldn’t forget how nigh-on miraculous this transformation is.” You’re right, although there’s also an element of an octogenarian getting their first DVD player.

10th over: England 76-1 (Hales 20, Root 3) In a team without Rabada, Steyn and Philander, there’s a bit of the old World XI/Ilford 2nds quote about Morne Morkel. He has temporarily restored order here with the wicket of Roy, and his second over costs just three.

9th over: England 73-1 (Hales 18, Root 2) The offspinner JP Duminy comes into the attack, a move that might slow England down for a couple of overs. Indeed it does, with three singles from the over.

“I agree with your point about Eoin Morgan,” says Matt Emerson. “I can’t understand why he’s not been in the mix for a Test place. I think he’d be a good shout for putting in at number three if we are to drop either Hales or Compton.” That might be too high but I would certainly have him at No5. I don’t think it will happen though, for a number of reasons: his lack of first-class runs, his lack of first-class matches and particularly the advantage of having a limited-overs specialist in charge.

8th over: England 70-1 (Hales 17, Root 0) Joe Root is the new batsman. “Easy to say when he’s smashing the bowling out of the park, but I would always have picked Roy over Hales in the short form if it’s one or the other. I saw him bat in a T20 game and he was first man out having just made his fifty. The score was something like 53 at the time. Might’ve been Sangakkara just admiring the carnage from the non-strikers end.”

Hales is a must in the T20 side, where he has been England’s best batsman for almost four years, but I agree about the 50-over side. Hales has the greater potential – he is capable of scoring 200 one day – but Roy is more reliable, and even if he doesn’t make big runs you know he will always score quickly.

WICKET! England 68-1 (Roy c Behardien b Morkel 48)

Morne Morkel strikes in his first over when Jason Roy drives a slower ball straight to extra cover. He’s irritated as he walks off, flipping his bat in the air, but that was a fine innings of 48 from 30 balls.

Morkel celebrates with teammates after dismissing Roy for 48.
Morkel celebrates with teammates after dismissing Roy for 48. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

Updated

7th over: England 61-0 (Roy 43, Hales 16) England are scoring at almost 10 an over. If they keep that up throughout the innings, they might just have enough runs to beat AB de Villiers. Hales shows his class with a quite gorgeous drive through extra cover for four.

Definitely not. I’d expect him to get the Sri Lanka series at the start of the summer before they make a judgement. It was such an obvious mistake to give him his debut in South Africa.

6th over: England 56-0 (Roy 43, Hales 11) M.I.A’s Marchant de Langelange gets some extra bounce to Roy, who can only fend it through the vacant third-slip area for a single. He helps himself to consecutive boundaries later in the over with a hook to fine leg and a storming drive over mid-off. That brings up the fifty in just the sixth over. This is England 2016. He finishes the over by hoicking a short ball sweetly into the crowd for the first six of the innings. He has 43 from 25 balls.

I don’t watch Surrey enough, so a question for those who do: is Roy a serious contender for a Test place? He has looked extremely good in the ODI side, even when he wasn’t making big scores last summer.

Look, there’s no need to embellish the past for effect. You know full well we were never only one down.

5th over: England 40-0 (Roy 28, Hales 10) Roy is struggling. He seems to have twisted his knee, and of course you aren’t allowed runners these days: not for a twisted knee, not for being an overweight, unfit, fat c- well you get the point. There’s a long break while Roy receives treatment, and he’s going to carry on for now. AB de Villiers takes the opportunity to get his team in a huddle and administer a rollocking.

“The team seems a bit lopsided, with seven possible bowlers to call upon to deliver the full 50 overs,” says Tom van der Gucht. “I would have considered slipping Taylor in at the expense of either Ali, or Rashid, with Root to fill in any extra spinning duties.”

Root is only a part-timer really, so they have six proper bowlers – which is what you want whenever possible, to cover injury or somebody having a bad day. The fact most of the bowlers can bat means the balance is fine, I think. Not having enough proper bowlers can really hurt you, as England found out in the 1979 final.

4th over: England 37-0 (Roy 25, Hales 10) Roy is timing the Gucci undercrackers off the ball. A short one from de Lange is touched serenely through square leg for his fifth boundary, though after that he gets a leading edge that lands safely on the off side.

3rd over: England 32-0 (Roy 20, Hales 10) As poor as South Africa have been, this is an excellent start from England. Hales clatters Morris for another boundary through the covers, and then Roy flicks another lovely, wristy boundary through midwicket. Roy has gone off like a getaway driver: he has 20 from 10 balls.

Yeah but that would dent his confidence even more. He got a hundred in the last series, and this is a format in which he is comfortable. Moeen gives England great options in terms of resting either opener, but I don’t think Hales has reached the point that Buttler did in the Test side, where it becomes counter-productive to keep him in the team.

Updated

2nd over: England 20-0 (Roy 13, Hales 5) The tall Marchant de Lange shows solidarity with his new-ball partner by bowling an equally poor over. It goes for 10 as well, with Roy tucking the last ball off the hip for four.

“Terrible decision to drop Taylor,” says Nick Butler. “I do sort of understand the dilemma but wouldn’t the best solution actually be to drop Morgan? Despite previous merits he is perhaps the weakest link in that line up these days? Taylor has consistently been excellent in ODIs, knowing exactly how to pace his innings based on the situation.” I think you could have argued that a year ago, but his Post Epiphany stats are astonishing: from memory it’s something like 754 runs at 58 with a strike rate of 102. He should be in the Test team too.

1st over: England 10-0 (Roy 8, Hales 0) There’s a subplot to England’s opening partnership, with Jason Roy presumably pretty keen to take Alex Hales’ position in the Test team. Chris Morris starts the series with a bit of a shocker, Harmisoning a wide full toss that is called wide. He overcompensates next ball, slipping one onto the pads of Roy, who flicks it through midwicket for four with the minimum of fuss. This is a poor start from Morris, and a wide half-volley is driven for another boundary.

“Why is Jordan playing above Broad?” says Harvey Lock. “I get the Taylor thing because whichever batsman was left out was going to be a tough call but why is Broad on the bench?”

Squad rotation. I’m not sure why cricket is so slow to accept this as an inescapable necessity of modern sport. Even football, cricket’s idiot cousin, did so almost 20 years ago.

He’s in danger of becoming the hard-luck story of his generation. I can understand the decision – who else do you leave out – but England are in danger of inflicting death by a thousand slights on his career.

It was the defective bogey. Always.

Morning. I’m late. I’m sorry. But it’s better to be late than never, as – pick this segue out – England’s one-day team has demonstrated in the last nine months. Last spring, at the age of 44, England’s ODI team experienced a shuddering epiphany. They met Brendon McCullum – the Michael Hutchence to their Kylie Minogue, if you want to be vulgar about it – and discovered the joy of six, the joy of liberation, the joy of smoking good deliveries out of the ground.

It’s hard to believe it’s not even a year since they made complete fools of themselves at the World Cup, when they turned up to an all-night rave wearing a bow tie and clutching a Thermos that their gran had made for them. She puts a soupcon of lavender in the latte, would you like to try some? When the World T20 starts next month, England will look and feel like they belong.

There are two T20s to come against South Africa, but first we have five ODIs. South Africa are formidable at home, where they have won an absurd 72 per cent of their ODIs since readmission. They have AB de Villiers, an indestructible robot in coloured clothing. And unlike the Test side at the start of the series, their one-day team is in good shape. But then – yep, really - so is England’s.

With that ... here’s Rob Smyth for the first innings

Team news

Roy will play, Taylor misses out. England are: Hales, Roy, Root, Morgan, Stokes, Buttler, Moeen Ali, Jordan, Willey, Adil Rashid, Topley.

South Africa: Amla, De Kock, Du Plessis, De Villiers, Duminy, Rossouw, Behardien, Morris, Morkel, De Lange, Imran Tahir

England win the toss and will bat

Eoin Morgan calls heads and the coin lands right side up for him. He says the side will continue to be positive, but fails to mention whether Jason Roy will play or not. AB de Villiers says he would have batted first too - but that the locals have been advising him to bowl first, so he’s not bothered either way.

de Villiers tosses the coin alongside Morgan.
de Villiers tosses the coin alongside Morgan. Photograph: Gareth Copley/Getty Images

Updated

Hmm, this could make life exciting:

While the England team are doing this sort of thing:

We’re five minutes from the toss, but the wicket looks something like this:

Morning all and welcome to the first of five ODIs between South Africa and England. Rob Smyth’s delayed on a train but will be here shortly, so you’ll have to put up with me, Tom Bryant, for a few minutes.

It looks as though Jason Roy may have passed a late fitness test to turn out for England. He suffered a back spasm on Monday and you wonder if it is worth risking him, given the batting depth England have to offer (England ODI batting depth - who knew that sentence would ever be written?) Still, if he does play, does that mean that James Taylor misses out. After he hit a century in the warm-up against South Africa A, he may well have thought he would be a certainty.

You can read more about that particular dilemma in Vic Marks’s preview here:

In other ODI news, New Zealand steamrollered Australia earlier this morning. You can read all about that here:

And you can read how it all unfurled right here:

Meanwhile, the great Mankad controversy continues to rumble along (my view: if you warn the bloke, and if you use it as a method of last resort to stop a batsman cheating, what’s the issue?)

Updated

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