Summary
Thanks for your company on here over the past few days, it’s been a blast. We’ve shared a series of incredible drama, unexpected scandal, and no shortage of gripping cricket. I can’t wait to do it all again soon.
Here’s your full report from Johannesburg.
And there’s a touching farewell for Morne Morkel who receives a pair of bronze New Balance boots mounted on a plinth. 86 Tests for 309 wickets at 27ish - very tidy career.
Kagiso Rabada is the man of the series for his 23 wickets at 19.26... but should he have even played the final two Tests?
Vernon Philander is man of the match for his 9-51 across the two innings.
Some snippets from Tim Paine’s interview:
“It’s been a really challenging week. I can’t doubt the effort but we couldn’t come to terms with what happened.”
On Smith and Warner: “We’ve obviously lost two of our best players, two of the best players, and they’re huge gaps to fill.”
On South Africa: “They were outstanding from the Durban Test match. They completely outplayed us.”
On the future: “It’ll be good for guys to get home and take a deep breath... Time to rebuild a new culture and play a lot better than we did in this Test match.”
This was a result that was feared at the start of the match following the week Australia had endured but even so, it remains one heck of a thumping.
Biggest Test victory margins by runs:
— Andrew Samson (@AWSStats) April 3, 2018
675 Eng beat Aus Brisbane 1928/29
562 Aus beat Eng Oval 1934
530 Aus beat SA Melbourne 1911
492 SA beat Aus Johannesburg 2018
491 Aus beat Pak Perth 2004
Australia 119 all out - South Africa win by 492 runs
South Africa arrived on day five knowing they would be celebrating at some point today, they just couldn’t have dreamed it would be so soon. Vernon Philander struck with his opening ball and then again later in his first over to start the rot. Four more fell at his hand in a mesmerising spell of seam bowling before a mindless run-out sealed the deal. Under 90-minutes of play to secure seven wickets and complete a 3-1 series victory, South Africa’s first at home over Australia since 1970.
WICKET! Lyon run out 9 (Australia 119)
Scratch that, Morkel was just switching ends, replacing Philander, who presumably had his arm sawn off at the wrist in order to release possession of the ball he’s turned into a weapon of mass destruction this morning.
What’s happened here? No! They haven’t. They have you know. Australia’s last wicket has just fallen to a run out. 492 runs behind, Lyon dawdles over a second and misses his mark by a couple of inches. What a shambolic ends to a disastrous Test in the most miserable of weeks. Get that plane in the air and back in Australia as soon as possible.
46th over: Australia 116-9 (Lyon 6, Hazlewood 9) Morkel’s fairtytale ending will not happen. Two overs is all he can manage with his side strain and it’s back to Maharaj.
“Watching (or rather reading about) Vernon Philander’s wonderful spell and the comments about his discipline cf. the England pace attack reminds me of a comment by the great Freddie Trueman re. I think Matthew Hoggard, “Any bowler who can’t deliver line and length to order shouldn’t be in a Test team”.” Excellent point Peter, I agree with Fred.
45th over: Australia 116-9 (Lyon 6, Hazlewood 9) Here’s where Australia have been going wrong, they should have reversed the order! Hazlewood plays the shot of the innings, lofting Philander over long off insouciantly, straight leading elbow, follow through held for the snappers and everything.
“Has this been one of the most brutal five months in cricket history?” asks Peter Salmon. “Just looking at the Aus and Eng teams that lined up in Brisbane in November. Basically only Paine, Mitch Marsh, Cummins and Malan have come away with their reputations better than when they started. The rest is carnage. Actually looking forward to it being over.” Amen, Peter. Let’s hope everyone gets their heads together soon and figures out the way forward. A better schedule, a better atmosphere and a better method of integrating associate nations please. (I’m not holding my breath.)
44th over: Australia 111-9 (Lyon 6, Hazlewood 4) Morkel gets a second chance to wrap up his Test career in style and despite a series of agonising play-and-misses from Lyon the edge eludes him.
@JPHowcroft Today's two test have shown that there is still much life left in test cricket. Two absorbing matches for two very different reasons.
— phil withall (@phil_withall) April 3, 2018
43rd over: Australia 111-9 (Lyon 6, Hazlewood 4) Almost, but not quite for Philander. Hazlewood does just enough to keep his side alive and even picks up four runs by virtue of the absence of a fine-leg. Apparently a 501 run lead means you don’t require fielders on the boundary.
Vernon Philander has been astonishingly skillful this morning. He hasn't found extravagant movement, with 0.5° of swing or 0.6° of seam slightly below the match average - but his accuracy has brought 31% false shots, more than double the global average. #SAvAUS pic.twitter.com/QqIoQ9D8wS
— The Cricket Prof. (@CricProf) April 3, 2018
Here’s Philander, will he finish it off?
42nd over: Australia 107-9 (Lyon 6, Hazlewood 0) Ah, this is golden, Morne Morkel has been thrown the ball with one wicket left to go. Can he sign off with the decisive wicket? Not immediately. Nathan Lyon gets in line and plays a couple of nice strokes, one for four through the off-side.
@JPHowcroft Australia is doing it wrong. At the end of the over just don't take guard. When the umpire comes over, just engage them in an 8 hour conversation until bad light stops play. S.A is awarded 5 runs (who cares?), you take your 3 demerit points and go home with a draw.
— Brenden Fawkes (@BrendenFawkes) April 3, 2018
41st over: Australia 100-9 (Lyon 0, Hazlewood 0) Philander six for three from six overs this morning. Give that man a Bunny Chow and an ice-cold Castle.
Hazlewood survives the hat-trick ball.
WICKET! Sayers c Elgar b Philander 0 (Australia 100-9)
SETTLE DOWN VERN I’VE GOT ENTRIES TO TYPE! Sayers out first ball, driving loosely, caught at third slip by Elgar.
WICKET! Cummins b Philander 1 (Australia 100-8)
TIMBER!!!!!! Cummins leaves a Philander delivery that pitches on the blade of grass where line meets length. It’s a terrible decision because the ball continues to clip the top of off stump.
40th over: Australia 100-7 (Cummins 1, Lyon 0) Maharaj has yet to really get into his stride this morning. Cummins gets off the mark and Lyon gets in line to defend safely thereafter.
“Has anybody calculated what percentage of Philander’s deliveries would be hitting/threatening the stumps?” asks Christopher Dale. “Suspect the comparison to England’s seamers would be striking.” Agree 100% Mr Dale. There’s wizardry in Philander’s minute control of variables but the stock ball is nothing flash and there’s no reason every seamer couldn’t expect to replicate it.
39th over: Australia 99-7 (Cummins 0, Lyon 0) Gee whiz, Lyon only just survives his first ball. This has been the spell this surface has threatened to deliver all match. It’s fitting it’s arrived this morning.
First time since the Kandy Test in 1999 v SL that AUS have lost 1st 6 wickets for under 100 runs in both innings of a Test
— Swamp (@sirswampthing) April 3, 2018
This was the match where Jason Gillespie & Steve Waugh collided in the outfield
@CricketAus #SAvAUS
WICKET! Paine c de Kock b Philander 7 (Australia 99-7)
My oh my. It’s that man again, big Vernon Philander. He’s not bowled a bad ball all morning and the pressure eventually tells on Tim Paine who nicks through to de Kock at one he probably could leave well alone. At least Paine has more time to settle in to seat 1A on the flight home. He’s earned it.
38th over: Australia 99-6 (Paine 7, Cummins 0) Maharaj into the attack early but there’s not much to report from his opening over.
“Does Philander not completely debunk England’s one dimensional ‘latest’ theory that we need raw pace in order to compete at the test level?” asks Scott Roberts rhetorically. “A bloke who bowls 79mph with a gale force wind behind him, but who bowls wicket to wicket (something we’re seemingly not capable of doing), hits the seam consistently and bowls a constantly challenging line and length (something else we’re not capable of doing). As Mark Wood has illustrated on numerous occasions, if you can’t bowl line and length or hit the seam consistently, all pace does is make you disappear to the boundary faster.”
I’m sympathetic to the logic but I think Philander is a particularly excellent exponent of what he does, and he is alongside the pace of Rabada, Morkel and Steyn in the SA attack. I’ve seen enough decent English seamers struggle in Australia to know 85mph-plus tends to be a minimum requirement at the highest level.
37th over: Australia 98-6 (Paine 6, Cummins 0) Australia survive the latest technical investigation by Philander. Paine even manages to eke out a run.
@JPHowcroft Just need Paine & Cummins to score a Nathan Astle-esque 200 each & it should make for an exciting finish.
— Brenden Fawkes (@BrendenFawkes) April 3, 2018
They’ll do it easy if they puff their chests out a bit more.
36th over: Australia 97-6 (Paine 5, Cummins 0) Rabada’s had a few no-ball issues this morning and they continue in an over delivered largely short and wide of Paine’s off stump.
“What would Australian fans say if, for instance, the Pakistan captain, vice-captain and a player were fined, not penalised and given a one match ban respectively for a similar ball tampering offence?” asks Ross McGillivray. “I reckon they would be outraged. We hold our players to a higher standard and rightly so. This might send a message to a few other countries and the ICC.”
35th over: Australia 95-6 (Paine 4, Cummins 0) Philander now three wickets for two runs this morning. Flawless line and length, toying with Australia’s batsmen like an infant with a wobbly tooth.
Heaviest ever Aust defeat by runs was 675 to England in Brisbane in 1928. Today Aust need to reach 204 to avoid the second heaviest, after a 408-run loss to West Indies at Adelaide in 1980 #SAvAUS
— Daniel Brettig (@danbrettig) April 3, 2018
WICKET! Handscomb b Philander 24 (Australia 95-6)
Philander has spent all morning on his trademarked line and length and it pays off for a third time, Handscomb inside-edging onto his pegs to a length delivery outside off stump. He never looked at ease at the crease, poor bloke. At least now he should be in pole position to secure an aisle seat on the flight home.
34th over: Australia 95-5 (Handscomb 24, Paine 4) Rabada bowls a maiden to Paine. Meanwhile, Warne has not stopped talking about people “walking around and owning the space” like the well-credentialed behavioural psychologist he isn’t.
"You never know, Handscomb and Marsh batted through the fifth day at Ranchi a year ago..."
— Geoff Lemon Sport (@GeoffLemonSport) April 3, 2018
Two Marshes out in four balls.
"Yeah, nah."
33rd over: Australia 95-5 (Handscomb 24, Paine 4) Shane Warne on commentary says the Marsh brothers need to behave like David Hasselhoff (yes, he name-checks The Hoff) and stick their chests out more when they’re playing cricket. The mind boggles. Was The Hoff in Warnie’s mural?
Best avg at the time of taking 200th wkt:
— Deepu Narayanan (@deeputalks) April 3, 2018
20.29 S Pollock
20.33 J Garner
20.61 Waqar Younis
21.21 I Botham/ C Ambrose
21.63 M Marshall
21.72 F Trueman
21.83 V PHILANDER
** Avg of other bowlers is at the end of inngs where they took the 200th#SAvAUS
32nd over: Australia 94-5 (Handscomb 24, Paine 3) Kagiso Rabada’s opening over is less eventful than Philander’s despite Handscomb not looking overly convincing at the crease. Rabada’s pace is back up into the high 130s kph, which is nice to see after some spells this match dropping into the low 120s.
Like Richard Liddle, you best get your banter in quickly because we might not be here for very long at this rate. “I think that it is a valid point to make that the ICC’s punishment is only a one game ban, however the impact caused by this has been huge. The millions in sponsorship etc. All because; Warner thought he was untouchable, Bancroft did what he was told and Smith wasn’t tough enough to say no. I don’t think the bans are disproportionate to the impact they have caused. Although i do expect to see them halved.”
31st over: Australia 89-5 (Handscomb 23, Paine 1) That was Philander’s 200th Test wicket, by the way, secured at an average of 21.8. Top drawer stuff.
WICKET! M Marsh c de Kock b Philander 0 (Australia 88-5)
Get out of town! Another Philandery delivery, another Marsh caught behind the wicket, this one a regulation nibble to the keeper. Get that Qantas drinks trolley stocked.
Updated
WICKET! S Marsh c Bavuma b Philander 7 (Australia 88-4)
Oi oi! First ball of the day and Marsh is on his way! Very Philandery delivery has Marsh leaning forward, inside-edging onto his thigh and lobbing a catch to Bavuma in the gully. Get that Qantas engine warmed up.
That’s lovely. South Africa have formed a guard of honour for Morne Morkel as he jogs out for the final time in Test cricket. 309 wickets at an average of 27.6 with one more bowl to go for the big lad.
South Africa remember have injury concerns over all three frontline pacemen. Vernon Philander has strapping to deal with a groin issue, Kagiso Rabada has a stiff back and Morne Morkel has a side strain. It will be fascinating to follow Faf du Plessis’ handling of his attack as the day wears on. Much will rest on the spinning fingers of Keshav Maharaj.
South Africa’s pursuit of victory could yet be derailed by the weather. It’s sunny at the moment but the chance of showers increases after lunch.
Considering how much assistance there has been in this pitch for bowlers it’s a miracle the Test has reached a fifth day, but here we are. Expect plenty of turn and bounce again for Keshav Maharaj who shapes as the day’s defining protagonist.
The final day.#SAvAUS pic.twitter.com/8oB9ORTP7Z
— cricket.com.au (@CricketAus) April 3, 2018
In other cricket news England were denied a series draw in New Zealand by some redoubtable batting by the Kiwi tail in Christchurch.
The latest development in the ball-tampering scandal is a call from the Australian players’ union for Cricket Australia to reconsider the length of the bans handed out to the three players found responsible for plotting to alter the condition of the ball in the third Test.
It’s also Darren Lehmann’s final Test as coach of Australia. Big Boof will retire with one of the more contested legacies as a consequence of the ball tampering affair.
Here he is a few months ago in conversation with one of the frontrunners to take his old job.
One of the many sub-plots to today’s play is the retirement of Morne Morkel. The paceman is battling with a side strain but managed to climb off the physiotherapy table to snare two late wickets yesterday. It would be fitting if such an excellent servant to South African cricket was farewelled with a win.
It’s a lovely day for a send-off. Help us bid farewell to @mornemorkel65 by joining us at the Bidvest Wanderers Stadium For Day 5 of the fourth #SunfoilTest. First 2000 people at the gate enter for free! #MyMorneMoments #ProteaFire #SAvAUS pic.twitter.com/OWuU1LYdYC
— Cricket South Africa (@OfficialCSA) April 3, 2018
Preamble
Hello everybody, congratulations, give yourself a big pat on the back, because you’ve made it, finally, to the very end of the Test series between South Africa and Australia. After more plot twists than Lost and with a storyline equally as fanciful, South Africa are going to beat Australia in a Test series at home for the first time since 1970. All that remains to be determined is the margin of victory: 2-1 or 3-1.
Seven Australian wickets stand in the way of a South African victory in Johannesburg after four days of soul crushing dominance by the Proteas in the wake of their opponents’ ball-tampering scandal. Yesterday’s play was especially brutal with South Africa batting long after they had choked the life out of any hope of an Australian victory, grinding an already demoralised attack into the Wanderers’ dust. And then when it seemed like we were in for a repeat of the timeless test of 1939, they snuck out three Australian batsmen before the close of play.
For the final time on this tour, if you’d like to join in the conversation, please send emails to jonathan.howcroft.freelance@guardian.co.uk or send tweets to @JPHowcroft.
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