Sir Alex Ferguson's media blackout

'Manchester United were forced to rename their TV channel in light of recent events,' chirps Keith Lyons
Photograph: Photomontage

'Ferguson found a cunning way to get around those pesky mandatory press conferences,' sniggers Steven Journeaux
Photograph: Photomontage

Forget Sir Alex, Joe Shepherd reckons our (anti)hero would make a fine king
Photograph: Photomontage

'Sir Alex tries to deal with his anger management issues with the Chorlton-cum-Hardy Over 65s tai chi group,' says Jason Froggett before getting really excited and adding: 'Oh GOD, I would love to see this' Photograph: Photomontage

Matt Barwick presents this nightmare vision: 'Without the burden of media commitments, Sir Alex was able to take advantage of Nani's injury to make a much needed upgrade' Photograph: Photomontage

Thomas Kerk and Graham Fordyce try to smash the system in this combined effort: 'A good dictator treats everyone equally – even his own TV station' Photograph: Photomontage

'Pretty soon this is going to be the only media organisation Fergie is going to talk to,' says Bruce Cooper in this tribute to Charlie Sheen Photograph: Photomontage

Iain Christie has been watching Goldfinger Photograph: Photomontage

Ashley Wright goes all Comical Ali on us Photograph: Photomontage

'Sir Alex may now speak no evil, but I am pretty sure he can still see those bottles of wine,' parps Jake Heimark Photograph: Photomontage

'Must ... Stay ... Still ... Must ... Not ... Air... Opinion.' Jason Coomey's depiction of the unscrupulous football hack isn't far off the mark Photograph: Photomontage

'Everyone was doing their bit for the cause, although the counting was proving difficult,' chuckles David Adam, who recognises that Ferguson was a war baby Photograph: Photomontage

'THE CAPTION ACCOMPANYING THIS EMAIL HAS BEEN DELETED BY MANCHESTER UNITED FOOTBALL CLUB,' blares Allan Heywood's, erm, caption Photograph: Photomontage

'The assembled hacks were surprised when Sir Alex gave a more intelligent and erudite response than usual,' smirks Sean Whittaker Photograph: Photomontage

‘The North West’s premier Simon & Garfunkel tribute act rework a classic to make a point,’ giggles Steve Fuller Photograph: Photomontage

'In a communist society the media does as it's told,' warns Peter Murray Photograph: Photomontage

'Despite their friendliness in public, Fergie has been known to refer to Wayne as Stupid Boy,' reckons the busy Allan Heywood Photograph: Photomontage

We don't know what Matt Mealor has been smoking, but here's his explanation for his entry: 'Dismayed by Kim-Jong Il-ex Ferguson's Orwellian media control, Mike Phelan, cunningly disguises himself as a tree and sends a message in one of Lord Ferg's wine botttles, cunningly disguised as cough medicine. The message will be transmitted verbally by a young Mexican Zapatista, cunningly disguised as a vicar, replete with standard vicar hat, cunningly disguised as a flan. Phelan is blissfully unaware of the Wes Brown Bear's search for a new scratching post. Nani is driving his Audi to Lord Ferg's to complain bitterly about his poorly leggy' Photograph: Photomontage

'Media blackout? What media blackout?' This courtesy of Rosman Grint Photograph: Photomontage

'Harry knew that there was only one way he could achieve a Fergie-style media blackout,' deadpans Ryan Doran about this spooky effort Photograph: Photomontage