A mum-of-three who is pregnant with her fourth child at the age of 53 has hit back at critics who say she is too old to be extending her family.
Lan Man last gave birth in 2019, at the age of 50, to her son Toby, after deciding she had more love to give.
The project manager decided to go through IVF alone after already raising Thomas, 19, and Tyler, 17, single-handily.
Lan, who lives in Pennsylvania, US, gave birth to her youngest son Toby in June 2019, having conceived him through egg and sperm donation.
At 53, she is now 26 weeks pregnant with Toby’s biological sibling, who she also plans to raise as a single mum.
Lan hoped her choice would give other women contemplating single motherhood the hope that it can be done.
The choice to bring Toby into the world came about when her two eldest were looking at universities, and she began to worry about what she would do without them.
“I love my job and logistically I have always worked to provide for my children,” she said.
“I considered starting my own business in the health and wellness industry as I have always been very health conscious and passionate about helping people to stay healthy. But it didn’t feel right.
Lan said she decided to become a mum once again at the age of 50, after her older kids asked her when she was going to give Toby a sibling.
“I didn’t think it was possible and said no more as I was 50,” she said.
“But my kids are best friends and they don’t know how they would live without each other. They must have been praying very hard and secretly advocating for Toby to have a sibling to grow up with and it worked!”
The pregnancy has been smooth, Lan said, and she was excited to welcome Toby’s sister into the world.
Lan’s private health insurance covered most costs but left her to fork out around £18,000 [$25,000] on sperm, eggs and the donor’s medication.
“I had no desire for a relationship as I value my independence,” she said “Initially, my doctor wasn’t on board but I explained how much this would mean to me and my family.
“I expressed how the baby will be born into a family filled with love and joy.
As she was yet to go through menopause, Lan had not experienced any issues with her reproductive system. However, doctors had advised her against using her own eggs due to her age.
Her two eldest sons had been with her “every step of the way”, she said, even helping her pick the donors.
Good health, both mental and physical, was the most important factor in selecting egg and sperm donors, she said.
The family having decided long ago that ethnicity wasn’t important; there weren't many Asian donors and little Toby has blonde hair and blue eyes.
Lan said she “just wanted to be a mother” and have the opportunity to show her children how enjoyable life is.
“My purpose in life is to accompany them through their life development,” she said.
Despite receiving negative backlash from her peers and strangers, Lan couldn't be happier.
She said: "Initially, my friends said I am crazy for having a child at 50 as they were looking forward to their kids fleeing the nest and retirement.
"But I have decided I have more life to give to my children, they are my purpose, meaning and calling in life.
"I am fit and healthy with a lot more love to give so it felt right for me.”
While Lan said she had been mistaken for Toby’s grandma by random people while out and about, she said they were “stranger” who had “no significance” in her life.
"Throughout my older children's lives, I prided myself with my total self-reliance,” she said.
"If I do not reply to anybody, then I never have to be tethered to their opinion and judgement."
