When I was a secretary on the Sun’s showbiz desk, I once took a call from a very haughty public relations expert who inquired: “Who is your opera correspondent?” To which the only possible response was: “Have you ever seen the newspaper?”
Today, I am indebted to another publication – the Daily Mail – for permitting the artform its debut in Lost in Showbiz. My eye is drawn to an article concerning the new general director of Glyndebourne, Sebastian Schwarz, whose rider conditions should pass immediately into music legend. To wit: he demands an apiary.
“It is amazing to sit next to a beehive in the morning when you first get up,” Sebastian explains – and there is no suggestion he is talking about the provisional wing of Beyoncé’s fans. Indeed, Sebastian will be bringing his bees over from Vienna, home to his last gig, and requires accommodation for this inspirational apian entourage.
In this request, he has been humoured by Glyndebourne’s executive chairman Gus Christie. (Who, the Mail notes, last year welcomed a son named Bacchus. Bacchus!) “We’re putting new hives in for Sebastian,” says Gus.
Well. I hope he doesn’t for a moment think that will be the end of it. Clearly, by the time we get to the festival’s opening night, things will have escalated to the point where the bees themselves are demanding their own flowerbeds with all the green bits picked out. Furthermore, opera critics should be aware of how very nasty things can get when the Beehive is set upon you, and temper their Glyndebourne reviews accordingly.
