Every week a Guardian Money reader submits a question, and it's up to you to help them out. A selection of the best answers will appear in Saturday's paper.
Would you accept a cruise holiday from your parents-in-law? Photograph: STR/AFP/Getty Images
This week's question: My parents-in-law are offering to pay for the whole family to accompany them on a cruise. I desperately need a holiday, but I can't face two weeks cooped up on a boat with my dreary mother-in-law. How I can I get them to pay for a holiday that would be much more bearable? Any advice/tips?
Here are some of the answers we've so far received:
This seems to me to be a very churlish response to a very generous offer. If you so "desperately" need a holiday then accept this one, strings and all, with gratitude. Cruise ships are large, with a lot of different activities on board, and presumably some ports of call, so it should be possible for you to spend some time with your in-laws and some apart. You might also consider that if you find your mother-in-law "dreary" she possibly has reservations about you too, which she is willing to overlook in the interests of family harmony. As for expecting them to pay for you to have a different holiday, this seems to me to be missing the point. They are offering you a shared holiday so you have only two choices: either accept with thanks and make the best of the situation, or decline.
Sheila de Alteriis, London
If your parents-in-law invited you round for dinner, would you politely refuse but ask them for the money to eat at a restaurant? It's the same scenario: they are offering to pay for your company, rather than buying you a holiday. If you want to go, go - if not then refuse, and find another way of funding your own holiday.
Kate Phem, via email
As someone who has had immense enjoyment organising family gatherings I would suggest you go with the flow and accept this extremely gracious offer. Sharing a holiday experience of a lifetime together will mean an awful lot to your children and mother-in-law. You may even be surprised at how smoothly things go on a large cruise ship with plenty of activities to run away to. Family life should be about shared experience and not one of begrudged visits.
Mark Hewis, Roehampton
What are your thoughts?
