The funniest sketch I’ve ever seen ...
Helen: Smack the Pony’s Dating Agency sketches. So silly, so gross, so desperate.
Ellie: My son drew a picture of me that looked exactly like Hitler, and made me laugh for about half an hour. Then I waxed my top lip.
The funniest heckle I’ve ever had ...
Helen: A very drunk Scotsman once stood up in the middle of the show and yelled out: “You’ve got fantastic breasts!” I wish he was at all my gigs.
Ellie: My dad is our roadie, and as a veteran comedian himself, likes to shout ad libs after our punchlines. I now hide his hearing aids before we go on stage.
The funniest meal I’ve ever eaten ...
Ellie: I went to a restaurant so posh that instead of a shaker, they give you a lump of Himalayan salt and a tiny grater. So there’s a constant, low-level soundtrack of grating.
The funniest thing that shouldn’t be funny ...
Ellie: My five-year-old son, who is south-east London born and bred, pronouncing his favourite pudding as “chocolate arse cream.” We laugh extra-hard when he does this in restaurants.
The funniest number ...
Helen: I think seven is always the funniest number. It’s such a nowhere amount. Not quite 10; it’s odd, it feels like a loner, a misfit.
The funniest joke I’ve ever heard ...
Helen: What do you say to a man wearing clingfilm underpants? “Well, I can clearly see your nuts!”
Scummy Mummies perform at Cheese and Grain, Frome, Thursday 7 November; touring to 1 December
