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The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Business
Monkey

Screws not bowled over

Monkey has already reported that the News of the World will not be attending tonight's British Press Awards after failing to garner any nominations. But Monkey's friends at the tabloid report that the event's organisers were so keen to get the Screws aboard that they even offered five free tickets and apologised for the lack of nominations. "Thanks but no thanks," said the Screws, who are taking the team 10-pin bowling.

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The Guardian - UK
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