Sadly, a complete dodo. Greenwich has initiated a programme to develop new British musicals, and we do need something in the post-Lloyd Webber era to plug the gap now that the National Theatre is running out of golden age American musicals to revive. But this can't be the best we can do.
Joe is a nice, lonely man living in New York. At 38, he is still a virgin, something he puts down to the fact that he fell in love with the midwife when he was born and never got over the fact she slapped him and made him cry. The rest of us might put it down to the fact that he is the size of a dump truck.
Joe has a rare gift: he can remember in perfect detail everything that has ever happened to him. You would think he might be employed by the Pentagon as America's secret weapon, but he is a cold caller in a telesales centre. In this instance, nice and gifted equals dim. So dim that Joe is no match for foxy telesales girl Odetta, for whom he falls heavily, or his best friend Jerry who wants Odetta for himself.
The first warning note is sounded by the fact that this is a British musical set, for no discernible reason, in New York. The second is that the first scene is such a shambles it only makes any sense when you reach the end. The third is that while this may be called new, it is just a fake antique taking its dramatic style from early Neil Simon and its musical style from the same era.
However, the cast, led by the amiable Clive Rowe, work like crazy, and the production improves 100% after the interval, when there is a nifty song and dance sequence that illustrates the relationship between the trio. But it doesn't save an evening full of songs that are literally show-stoppers, and which boasts a hero who has all the charisma of cardboard.
· Until October 12. Box office: 020-8858 7755. Then at the Sherman Theatre, Cardiff (02920 646900) from October 14-19.
