“It’s a new hole day!” proclaimed Ginger Minj, after last week’s Sturm and all the Drang of Jasmine Master’s elimination … which would’ve worked, except it became pick-your-own-team week, and Max, Violet Chachki and Jaidynn Diore Fierce ended up on a team together because everyone else had better ideas.
But if anyone has proven her ability to persevere over everyone else’s drama, it’s Max, who pulled off both a team and a personal win despite Jaidynn Diore Fierce’s onstage meltdown during last week’s team challenge. Meanwhile, you had Trixie Mattel, Pearl, Miss Fame and Katya sparring because there was no one in charge; and Ginger Minj, Ms Kasha Davis, Kandy Ho and Kennedy Davenport (that’s two of four members who have already lip synced) trying to werk the other group.
And, of course, it was another performance challenge: the queens couldn’t just lip sync the songs they were assigned, they had to make up, sing and perform their RuPaul parody lyrics in a music video. “Punny or die,” Ru said – but how shady about Ru could you get?
Ginger, Kasha, Kandy and Kennedy went all in and old school, parodying RuPaul’s multiple endorsement deals – from the candy bars to the perfume to the T-shirts – even though Ru herself gave them massive side-eye during the video shoot. Meanwhile, Team Max went for last season’s queens (Courtney Act, Adore Delano and reigning queen Bianca del Rio) to great effect and Team Drama went for a tanning-theme parody after everyone argued.
Though Team Max did by far the best shot-for-shot parody of last season’s queens, it came down to an individual win and Kennedy Davenport, straight off of her Lip Sync for Your Life, won despite her total Ru pwnage; Pearl (whose sleepwalking has put season 5 narcoleptic winner Jinxx to shame) fought with Trixie Mattel for the lip sync challenge and, if there was an undeserved elimination, it was this one: “sleepwalking” Pearl and her Liza impression stayed, while Trixie sashayed away.
Megan: Oh, come on! Kennedy was good but both that Jaidynn impression of Bianca and (sigh) the Violet impression of Adore were spot on and Katya’s Miami over-tanner was fabulous even if her cigarette trick was familiar. Pearl could be good but, damn, did they relax the drug guidelines after Willam? Stoners thinks she needs to fake being more like a reg to stay in the competition.
Brian: I’m sorry, but I can’t believe that they picked Pearl over Trixie. It looked like she was doing a camp impersonation of Myra Breckinridge casting a spell on a demon instead of lip syncing the song. If it were based entirely on lip syncing then Trixie definitely should have won. Neither of these queens should have been in the bottom anyway. It’s sad that Trixie, a truly original queen with an original point of view and a great aesthetic, went home before Kandy or Jaidynn who are so boring and unoriginal that I can’t even tell them apart. (PS – what happend to the mini challenge? Was there not time for one this week? And do we have to call the main challenge a “maxi challenge”? That sounds like a show that should be on Lifetime, not Logo.)
Megan: I know you’re #TeamMax but thank you Michelle Visage for demanding something other than a gray wig! Come on, girl. Platinum. And I really appreciated Violet, of all people, who learned to contour her cleavage after the #bornnaked challenge into something that looked like tits on stage. That was impressive, and I’ve been managing actual tits for 25 years. But she needs to get her attitude problem in check like she got them titties in check.
Brian: Sadly I must say that Violet is one of the few queens this season who I think has what it takes to go all the way this year. I am always and forever #TeamMax, but Violet always delivers in challenges and always has a great look. What’s great about her is that her runway is different each week, but it fits a certain character and is always consistent. She really knows her stuff. But that attitude! I see why no one wants to work with her. But I see a breakdown in her future in Ru building her back up into a whole new kinda queen. The one I was really surprised by though was Miss Fame. She’s throwing a whole lot of attitude for someone who can’t sing, can’t dance, can’t act, and can’t do anything other than the same tired thing each week. She needs to check herself before she wrecks just about everything.
Megan: I mean, if Miss Fame was smart, she’d cozy up to a drag mother and learn some shit; not even Bianca last season could resist helping out a queen who needs it. But rather than go all Adore with it despite her admitted total lack of non-pretty-girl skill, she’s just faking the shit she doesn’t know in the hopes that Ru and Michelle won’t notice … but, as Ru said, it’s no longer about the dead weight, it’s about the minimal talent.
Brian: What makes me sad about tonight’s episode is I feel like getting rid of Trixie is really getting rid of a lot of great talent before it’s time. What is Kandi Ho going to do in the Snatch Game? Something awful I’m sure, whereas Trixie would have killed. To get rid of her before that (especially in lieu of Pearl) was just a mistake as big as getting Jessica Alba, America’s most famous unemployed person, as a guest judge. Both of them just aren’t adding much to the proceedings. I don’t want to be all “this season sucks” already, but if someone doesn’t step up their game and start wowing me soon, I’m going to be sadder than than Michelle Visage in the Emerald City in no time.
Best lines:
Lucien Piane: “All right, calm down Mariah.”
Trixie on Pearl: “She really needs to get herself a fresh pair of batteries.”
Michelle on Miss Fame: “Those aren’t shoulder pads, those are her shoulders.”
Lucien on Kennedy: “How much did her hair have to smoke to get that high?”
Michelle on Pearl: “Are you a stoner girl, because that’s the vibe I got?”
Ross Matthews: “Bea Arthur was once inside me as well.”
Ginger Minj on Kasha: “Ethel Merman and Paul Lind had a love child burst forth from Kasha’s vocal cords.”
Ginger Minj: “Not today, satin, not today.”
