Caleb Shomo, the Beartooth frontman and former Attack Attack! vocalist, has come out as gay after more than 14 years of marriage to his wife, Fleur Shomo.
The 33-year-old musician shared the announcement on Instagram last Saturday (May 23), saying he felt forced to address growing public speculation about his personal life before it began affecting the people closest to him.
“There’s been a lot of speculation surrounding my personal life as of late and I feel compelled to set the record straight before it affects those I love any further,” Caleb wrote.
“I am a proudly gay man.”
The announcement was followed by a separate statement from Fleur, 41, who described the past few months as “a very disorienting and hurtful time to navigate.”
Caleb Shomo came out as gay after 14 years of marriage to his wife, Fleur Shomo
Fleur and Caleb married in April 2012 and do not share any children.
Caleb said his orientation was something he had been privately wrestling with for years before going public.
“This is something I’ve been unpacking and reckoning with in my life for quite some time now,” he wrote. “It’s been difficult to navigate the feelings surrounding the subject and figure out what to do with this fact.”
The musician connected that struggle to the darker emotional themes that have run through Beartooth’s music over the years.
“When it comes to my art / Beartooth, I have always strived to chase who I am in the deepest part of my soul from album to album,” he wrote.
He said fans who followed the band in its earlier years would know that several of the albums dealt with his religious upbringing, depression, self-hatred, self-loathing, and hopelessness.
“I am grateful for all these albums, yet feel embarrassed at times that I wouldn’t allow myself to really dig up the roots for so long,” Caleb wrote.
The singer also said drinking had been part of the way he avoided confronting what he was feeling.
“I spent a decade burying feelings with alc*hol, and honestly when I decided to put it down and focus on exploring why I felt this way for so long, it’s been a direct path to me reconciling with my s**uality in hopes that it will eventually lead to me experiencing self love,” he wrote.
The musician said his music will continue to reflect the relationship he has with his identity and orientation
Caleb said the realization will shape his upcoming work, adding that he has promised himself he will no longer dilute what he wants to express.
He said he made a vow to express himself “whole heartedly and fully” on Beartooth’s forthcoming album.
“Wherever it takes me I will follow and I refuse to water any part of it down, from the music, to the lyrical content, and the way I portray myself,” he wrote.
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“I will only do what makes me happy at the deepest level and what is the most honest depiction of who I am.”
“I believe it’s impossible to love every part of you when you won’t face every part of you head on,” he continued. “I am trying to finally be proud of who I am and I think this is a massive part of that journey.”
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He ended his message by thanking those who had shown him love and support, while motivating others who are struggling with their identity to be honest with themselves.
“I encourage anyone who’s struggling with who they are to give yourself grace. Give yourself patience. Be honest with yourself,” Caleb wrote.
“Do the hard work instead of burying it down as deep as you physically can, thinking it will change like I did. Holding these things in only hurts you and those around you.
Love you all, and hopefully this is a step in the right direction to loving myself one day.”
Fleur said the situation has left her angry, broken, and confused, but still wanting to support her former partner
Fleur’s statement made clear that Caleb’s announcement also marks the end of a marriage she is still grieving.
The podcast co-host said the past few months had been painful for both of them, even as she continued to care deeply about Caleb’s well-being.
“But I will always want to love, protect and support Caleb. I have cared more about his well being over the years than anything else in the world,” she wrote.
Fleur said she had seen Caleb’s “confusion and pain” as he struggled with his orientation, but did not know how to help him through it.
“You never want anything more for your person than for them to just be ok,” she wrote. “You also ask yourself constantly if you’re a bad person for wondering what this means for your world and the anger you also feel.”
She described the situation as emotionally complicated because she wants to support Caleb while also losing the life they built together.
“I am the only person that is having to deal with the duality of this situation,” Fleur wrote. “To support him whilst losing everything has been incredibly hard to figure out.”
“You can love and support your person through the hardest time in their life, whilst also being completely demolished and losing yourself at the same time,” she added.
“You question everything. But I have learned the one thing I don’t need to question is our history. No matter what anyone will say, I know it.”
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In her statement, Fleur said their nearly 14 years of marriage had been “wonderful” and full of “fun, adventure & love.”
“Nobody will know anything about our marriage like we do,” she wrote. “And no one can ever truly know what depths of love exist between two people unless they are those people.”
“I really feel sorry for the wife,” a fan wrote
Matthew Hertgen, the former Wesleyan soccer player who was found not criminally responsible for taking his younger brother’s life during a psychotic episode, has been found lifeless inside his New Jersey jail cell.
The 32-year-old lost his life less than two months after a judge ruled that he was not criminally responsible due to severe mental illness in the homicide of his 26-year-old brother, Joseph Hertgen.
Matthew consumed his brother’s eyeball in the process.
Hertgen’s passing came before he could be transferred into New Jersey’s psychiatric hospital system. The incident is being treated as voluntary, though officials have not released a formal cause of passing.
Matthew Hertgen, responsible for the homicide of his brother, was found lifeless inside his prison cell
Joseph Hertgen was fatally wounded on the night of February 22, 2025, inside the Michelle Mews apartment complex, a high-end Princeton development near Princeton University where the brothers lived.
Police arrived at the apartment around 11:16 pm after Matthew called 911 himself, reporting both a fire and a lifeless body.
Inside, officers found Joseph’s body lying in a pool of blood. They also discovered the charred remains of the family’s cat.
Authorities said Joseph, a former University of Michigan soccer player, had been stabbed and beaten with a knife and a golf club. But the brutality of the attack did not end there.
Investigators later recovered a fork and plate at the scene, evidence prosecutors cited while alleging that Matthew may have removed and eaten one of his brother’s eyeballs.
The Hertgen brothers had grown up in a $1.1 million home in Toms River before the family moved to the luxury Princeton apartment complex.
Matthew had been a soccer player at Wesleyan, one of the most expensive private universities in Connecticut, while Joseph had played at the University of Michigan.
Matthew was initially charged with first-degree homicide, multiple weapons offenses, ndird-degree animal cruelty for the burning of their cat.
Matthew suffered from schizophrenia, and allegedly attacked his brother to fulfil “prophetic visions”
The court case later centered on whether Matthew could be held legally responsible for Joseph’s homicide.
Hertgen waived bail and agreed to remain in custody during pre-trial proceedings. A week after his February 2025 arrest, he attempted to hang himself inside his Mercer County Jail cell.
That attempt became part of the psychiatric evidence in the case.
We are heartbroken and saddened to hear about the tragic passing of former soccer student-athlete, Joseph Hertgen. He was a wonderful young man and teammate who will always have a special place in our hearts. Our thoughts, prayers and love go out to his parents. pic.twitter.com/kgku3cOXiM
— Michigan Men’s Soccer (@umichsoccer) March 5, 2025
Forensic psychologist Dr. Gianni Pirelli testified that Hertgen had suffered from years-long schizophrenia, with delusions and hallucinations that existed long before the attack.
According to Pirelli, Hertgen experienced “prophetic and divine visions” and believed at different points that he was Jesus Christ, the Antichrist, God, or a person with multiple souls.
“Anytime he closes his eyes, he’s seeing tremendous visions,” Pirelli said.
The psychologist also told the court that Hertgen believed the world was close to the apocalypse and that only a “sacrificial m*rder could save it.”
Pirelli said Hertgen had been influenced by a chapter in Swiss psychologist Carl Jung’s Red Book titled “The Sacrificial M*rder.”
“It kind of clicks for him and he puts two and two together,” Pirelli said.
The testimony also described Hertgen’s belief that an evil spirit was attacking him and that he needed to “save his own soul” through sacrifice.
During his jail attempt to harm himself, Pirelli said, Hertgen had another “vision of prophetic and divine nature” and believed he needed to end his own life to save the world.
Matthew’s schizophrenia meant he couldn’t be held criminally responsible for the homicide of his brother
On March 19, 2026, Mercer County Superior Court Judge Robert Lytle found Hertgen not criminally responsible due to severe mental illness.
The ruling meant the court accepted that Hertgen had attacked Joseph, but that his schizophrenia and delusions left him legally insane at the time.
Experts for both the prosecution and defense agreed that Hertgen lacked the ability to understand the wrongfulness of his actions when the attack occurred.
Prosecutors said they could not contest the finding.
As a result, Hertgen was expected to be committed to a state psychiatric hospital instead of being sentenced to prison. Judge Lytle had set a May hearing to address the conditions of that commitment and determine where Hertgen would be held.
That hearing never happened.
Hertgen was still inside Mercer County Jail when he was found lifeless on May 8.
His family later described him in his obituary as a “caring and loving person” who had struggled with “severe and profound mental health issues” in his later years.
“During his later years, Matthew struggled with severe and profound mental health issues; yet he expressed sorrow, remorse, and repentance in many ways,” the obituary stated.
“Downright inhumane.” The details of Hertgen’s attack left readers stunned
