I’ve seen bad dancers before. I’ve seen dancers that could use a little work. Rob Gronkowski doesn’t fit into either of those categories.
He belongs in the “this person should never bust a move again” box. Because, fam, he really shouldn’t.
I won’t profess to be a great dancer myself but, of course, I’ve got a few moves that I can hit them with out there on the dance floor that look pretty darn good, if I do say so myself.
Gronkowski absolutely does not. This is a fact. And we know this because, for whatever reason, he wanted show his moves off ahead of the Super Bowl LIV beach party he’s throwing tonight.
Who taught him this? Put them under the jail. He’s out here moving like an ever stiffer version of Godzilla, which I didn’t think was possible until today.
How can you be this stiff and be a football player all at once? Aren’t they supposed to have immaculate footwork? Someone explain it.
And that floss? Hoo boy, that floss — the “crazy Frankenstein floss” or whatever he calls it. Let’s hope he doesn’t bust that move on them tonight. He might send someone to the ER swinging his arms like that.
No idea who is going to be on the next season of Dancing With The Stars. But I can absolutely tell you who is NOT going to be. I think you see where I’m going here.
