The funniest standup I’ve ever seen
Frank Skinner’s routine on jealousy changed how I viewed standup. It has everything. Rage, empathy, filth, overapplied logic, tragedy and an exceptional amount of jokes. And the pacing is perfect. It’s five minutes long and he spends four of it on his knees barely even engaging with the audience. It’s like they’re not even there. This is one man going through his crisis for his own sake, not ours, but thankfully we’ve snuck into the therapy session.
The funniest sketch I’ve ever seen
Pretty much every sketch in Cowards. I frequently say “Shake my drink!” and “Try ’ucknall” to myself as I wander around my flat.
The funniest book I’ve ever read
All my favourite books are written by Steve Martin. Pure Drivel probably wins for silliness but The Pleasure of My Company is a masterpiece.
The funniest item of clothing I’ve ever owned
A real tight vest with Zayn Malik’s face on it.
The funniest person I know
Adam Hess. We live together and toured together and I’m still not sick of the freak. He’s a ridiculous robot who doesn’t think or dress like anyone else. The most I’ve ever laughed watching live comedy was seeing him gig in 2013. It physically hurt – a human sensation he could only dream of.
The funniest meal I’ve ever eaten
A Brazilian BBQ restaurant recommended by my girlfriend’s colleague. It was literally in a school, every dish was sausage and onions and a full band set up and started playing one metre from our table.
The funniest word
Perish.
The funniest number
When someone does something wrong I always say “Are you one?” and they never laugh. But I do. So one.
The funniest thing that shouldn’t be funny
I overheard three words my dad said to my 18-year-old cousin one Christmas, and they were: “young, horny guys.”
Rhys James is at The Comedy Loft, Reading, 29 July; Wiseboy is at Pleasance Courtyard, Edinburgh, 2-27 August
