Ready? Steady? Review!
TchêWertz – Exciting Axions In The Dark Matter
If I understand it correctly, this track took shape when TchêWertz
took a shine to the music on his kid’s video game, Car Bites Car. When
he started playing the riff over and over, he noticed a similarity to
the Beatles’ I Am The Walrus, something that he tried to tease out of
the resulting track. I’m not sure if that was such a good idea,
because even Oasis’ cover of said classic, played backwards through a
broken mobile phone speaker would sound better than what we’ve ended
up with here. It’s a vaguely threatening collection of staccato
chords, overlaid with the kind of squeaky synth that the War On Drugs
would reject for sounding “too 80s”. It does build up, but substitutes
the Beatles’ riotous bundle of ideas for overuse of a very bad guitar
pedal. TchêWertz admits that it’s unfinished and is looking for
helpers, but even Paul, Ringo and Jeff Lynne would have their work cut
out rescuing this. MH
A matching outfits blog
@guideguardian #ReviewAnything http://t.co/bAeh2TM2Cl
— Oneofusshouldchange (@1ofusshudchange) October 24, 2014
An SDN, or Same Dressed Nightmare, is a phenomenon that’s universally feared; a chest-tightnening dread that knows no bounds of age, gender, class, race, religion or to which side of the Edward/Jacob debate you happen to lean. It bonds us. Humans across the globe agree flatulence is amusing, think puppies are wittle woolly cutie pies, and would choose hideous injury over finding themselves in a social situation decked in the same garb as someone else. One Of Us Should Change is a compendium of such horrors. It makes for harrowing viewing. Some pics show people oblivious to their predicament, others show people trying bravely but fruitlessly to embrace it. Each are already as good as dead. It’s an obituary of the sartorially defeated and should probably come with a NSFW warning. If you’re a fan of petty schadenfreude though, you could do a lot worse than spending a couple of minutes laughing your botty off at some hopeless chumps. LH
A live AV installation
@guideguardian please review this vid of @fliesandflies live show (they play inside a plastic projection cube) http://t.co/VtFGpolPmP ta 🙈
— Gurner Herzog (@tubbsOreally) October 24, 2014
Bands: if you really want to get people’s attention, you should seriously consider performing inside a big box. It’s a guaranteed winner. I mean, we all remember the name of that metal band who played in that airtight cube a few months back, right? (Glandular Destruction, was it? Unutterable Evisceration, possibly? Really Horrible Thing Happening To Someone’s Internal Organs?) Anyway, the latest bunch of squares - arf - to embrace the power of the box are flies+flies, who have clambered inside a big translucent tub and projected their spindly indie silhouettes on to its wall, set against some lovely swirling, smeared visuals. The effect is rather soothing. Well done to all involved. But what about their music? Oh, come on, as if anyone cares about that. GM
A rather long essay
Here is an essay i wrote, don't worry i can take the criticism.
Capitalist objectivism in the works of Mapplethorpe, By A Smyth, Ba, G.C.S.E.
1. The pretextual paradigm of narrative and Lyotardist narrative
The primary theme of the works of Gaiman is not, in fact, theory, but posttheory. A number of discourses concerning the genre of subsemioticist society may be found. “Class is unattainable,” says Derrida; however, according to Tilton, it is not so much class that is unattainable, but rather the collapse, and eventually the paradigm, of class. It could be said that Sartre promotes the use of the precultural paradigm of consensus to deconstruct outdated perceptions of society. If the pretextual paradigm of narrative holds, the works of Gaiman are reminiscent of Gibson.
Thus, the subject is interpolated into a capitalist objectivism that includes narrativity as a whole. The main theme of Porter’s critique of Foucaultist power relations is not narrative, but neonarrative. It could be said that the subject is contextualised into a capitalist objectivism that includes reality as a totality. Hubbard states that we have to choose between cultural posttextual theory and dialectic capitalism. However, in Junky, Burroughs reiterates Lyotardist narrative; in Port of Saints, although, he deconstructs the pretextual paradigm of narrative. Bataille suggests the use of neocultural deconstructive theory to modify and attack truth.
2. Realities of failure
“Class is part of the defining characteristic of art,” says Derrida. But if Lyotardist narrative holds, we have to choose between Batailleist `powerful communication’ and subcultural theory. Foucault’s essay on the pretextual paradigm of narrative implies that the task of the reader is social comment, given that consciousness is distinct from truth.
The characteristic theme of the works of Burroughs is the rubicon, and hence the futility, of modernist sexuality. It could be said that Lacan promotes the use of capitalist objectivism to deconstruct class divisions. Foucault uses the term ‘Lyotardist narrative’ to denote the role of the writer as observer.
In the works of Burroughs, a predominant concept is the concept of predialectic language. Therefore, Debord suggests the use of conceptualist subdeconstructive theory to read sexual identity. The subject is interpolated into a capitalist objectivism that includes sexuality as a paradox. But Scuglia holds that the works of Burroughs are postmodern. Foucault uses the term ‘the pretextual paradigm of narrative’ to denote not discourse, but neodiscourse.
In a sense, Sontag promotes the use of capitalist objectivism to attack hierarchy. The premise of Lyotardist narrative states that language has objective value. Therefore, many deconstructions concerning capitalist objectivism exist. In Queer, Burroughs affirms Lyotardist narrative; in The Last Words of Dutch Schultz he examines capitalist objectivism.
But Marx uses the term ‘Debordist situation’ to denote the bridge between sexual identity and culture. Marx suggests the use of capitalist objectivism to deconstruct and read class. So from this, it's clear that whenever neo-naratives apply to the broadest possible objectivist pseudo-paradigms, that masturbation is the purest form of neodiscourse.
Hey Aaron, I made the conscious decision to read people like Ha Joon-Chang on capitalism so I can have pithy sound bites to use when needed to mask the fact I can’t be bothered reading stuff like this. Lines like “The characteristic theme of the works of Burroughs is the rubicon, and hence the futility, of modernist sexuality” just don’t ring true to me, sir, in all my glorious ignorance. My advice is: emancipate yourself from mental slavery and start writing essays about your favourite yoghurt or something a lot less like that scene from Good Will Hunting, which is exactly the sort of tomfoolery you’ll read in the Guide. Hope you got a good mark though. LB
Harry’s Dead – Would A Girl Please Suck My D*ck?
#ReviewAnything @guideguardian Whatever. https://t.co/d6Iufw7ZaH
— HD (@HarryBudiniFan) October 24, 2014
Short answer: no. PM
Okay, I know I'm not exactly a Jeff Beck, Beck Hansen one, not even a middle Beck. But I have this inexplicable urge to compose some weird songs and, unintentionally, watching João, my four-year-old play on the Mac with a car game called "Car Bites Car" or something , I tried to follow the soundtrack on my guitar, I liked the progression of some chords that accidentally found and recorded. When listening a few days later I noticed some resemblance to "I'm the Walrus". The first thing I thought was to forget the music because I did not want to plagiarize anyone, especially John, my hero, but I could not resist and went back to Garageband, I gathered some parts, other modified to create riffs that I liked so posted in my band page, the TchêWertz Sketches at Soundcloud, with the provisional name of "The Eggman?" changed to "Family Tree (So High)" and now I replaced it with a Newer recording renamed of "Exciting in the Axion Dark Matter (so high)". I am looking for a partner for this job, someone to help me complete the song, you know, with instrumental or even with a letter (why not?) I'm open to suggestions, you can contact me on twitter Tchwertz. Thanks
https://soundcloud.com/tchewertz/family-tree-so-high