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The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
Entertainment
Luke Holland, Lanre Bakare, Gwilym Mumford, Paul MacInnes and Simon Wardell

#ReviewAnything - from spoken word to bedroom power pop, we rate your creative handiwork

review anything
We really do review anything. Photograph: Fiona Shaw/The Guide

Ready? Steady? REVIEW!

Ingrid Plum - Early

Some music just has a knack of causing the listener to explode with goosebumps the size of ham hocks. To this end, a cappella folk is the easiest, howf-up-the-pitch-and-tap-in route one – it doesn’t need to try particularly hard to get the desired result. Ingrid Plum’s effort is much, much better than, say, John Lewis’s trite attempts to nail this every Christmas. Early is a crystal stream winding its way through the mist-strewn Highlands; a stream without a single drop of urine, corpse, or discarded prophylactic in it. It’s starkly beautiful, like an Arctic tundra, or one of my legs. Further bonus points are also awarded for the line “My dress is too sexy / I wear it to bars,” redolent both of Right Said Fred’s well-documented issues with too much sexiness and my own, because I really to have amazing legs. For this, Ingrid Plum, you win. LH

A spoken word rap album

NOTE TO THE READER: this review is not going to be funny. Soz.

In an interview discussing the success of her book Gone Girl last week, Gillian Flynn articulated a literary preference. “I don’t care if I dislike a character,” she said. “I care if I find them interesting”. Put it this way, then: I don’t like Pierquin, I don’t like his fantasies about sex with porn star Skin Diamond, or his grubby little drug habit. I don’t really like “spoken word rap”, which basically means more words and less attention to rhythm (the verses on track two of this five track EP don’t just miss the beat but the next one, too). The music is low key; sleepy hip-hop/trap rhythms paired with guitar, distortion and samples from Adventure Time. The themes are those of the loner, bedsit living, being stuck in your own mind and on the internet. All in all the effect is gloomy and miserable. But it does feel true, thoughtful and well composed. I don’t like it, but I find it interesting and that makes it worth listening to. PM

Colourful Sevens - Small Smile (Close)

“I write poorly produced power pop in my room,” writes Rob Wilson AKA Colourful Sevens, and cor, he ain’t half right, you know. This sounds like it was recorded in the Children’s BBC broom cupboard. Is that Ed the Duck on vocals? Still, badly produced needn’t mean straight up bad, and Small Smile (Close) is raffishly charming in a Unicorns-y, “hey guys, let’s record the next track on a Tomy Speak And Spell” sort of way. I’m going to deduct points for the kite artwork though, as I developed a pathological fear of those little fabric terrors after since seeing this public safety ad as a young boy. Remember kids: kites kill. GM


Hercules Morse - Edge Of Morse


Self defined as a “UK-based hard rock band with desert/stoner influences”, Hercules Morse could have saved time and just said: “We sound a lot like QOTSA”. Edge Of Life is like five Josh Homme songs in one, replete with those little guitar licks from the breakdown bit of Regular John. The only thing that makes Hercules sound original is their singer, who doesn’t try to copy Homme’s vocal but instead goes for a delivery which makes the song come off like the score to the opening titles of an early 00s teen drama. That’s no bad thing, as anyone who’s listened to Remy Zero’s Smallville soundtrack can attest. Not the most progressive thing you’ll ever hear but you won’t feel the urge to smash Spotify with your bong, either. LB


Pilgrim Speakeasy – Lo-Fi Love At The Park Cafe

If you can get beyond the slightly silly band and album name, the music here offers greater rewards. Opener Vibrations kicks off as loungecore music for a Latin American TV travelogue, then Santana’s evil twin appears to mess the joint up. The following tracks are also pleasingly eclectic. At times, you’re offered 70s west coast psychedelic funk-rock alternating with early 90s indie pop; at others, you can hear the guitarist itching to launch into his Best of Metallica riffs. There’s also a solo instrumental on Spanish guitar and a song full of hmms (Hmm Hmm Hmmm Hmmm). Lyrically, the songs engage politically in the way Heaven 17 did - banner-friendly sentiments delivered with anger and a certain amount of humour (“The trickle down effect is a shower of shite”). And the rather well-spoken Scottish (I presume) singer sounds like the leadman of mid-80s new wavers Furniture, of Brilliant Mind fame. Engelbert Humperdinck and the Family Stone, anyone? SW





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