As the January 6 riots wound down, the US Capitol was left streaked with urine, blood, and feces. Smoking piles of wreckage and beer cans were scattered around the National Mall, and most assumed that American politics had finally reached its lowest possible point.
Consequences for those who’d tried to overthrow democracy and shred the Constitution came with a series of swift arrests and stiff sentences. It was at least reassuring to know that the nation still stands for something, and a bunch of drunken, poorly educated hicks couldn’t actually dismiss the legitimate results of a presidential election.
Then Donald Trump returned to the presidency and promptly pardoned them all, tossing the prison gates open and letting these lunatics run free once more. As anyone could have predicted, many of these psychos have since gone on to commit further crimes, including a worryingly high number of sex crimes against children.
Has a single Republican come out against Trump's slush fund for terrorists, cop assailants, and child sex predators yet? @SenThomTillis? @RepDonBacon?
— EU says Elon should not lie abt my blue check (@emptywheel) May 16, 2026
Or are they happy being the party that steals from their constituents to pay terrorists?https://t.co/Gw23Cyvlhz
Now, in a development that’s left America genuinely nauseated, these assorted bozos will soon be millionaires. This comes as part of a settlement in which Trump dropped his $10 billion lawsuit against the IRS over the leak of his tax records.
Christmas comes early for child predators
In return, $1.776 billion (a nod to 1776) fund of taxpayers’ money will be paid to people who claim they were victims of government “weaponization and lawfare” under the Biden administration. This includes pardoned Jan 6ers, with many of them rubbing their hands at this colossal government payout.
Republicans are seemingly fine giving payouts to convicted child predators. During today’s markup they blocked my proposal to prevent the Jan. 6 slush fund from going to insurrectionists who sexually abused children after being pardoned by Trump. pic.twitter.com/ZfomVG4BZ5
— Richard Blumenthal (@SenBlumenthal) May 19, 2026
But surely – surely – the Trump administration wouldn’t make convicted pedophiles millionaires? Sen. Richard Blumenthal clearly saw the way the wind was blowing and drafted an amendment to block the administration from “making any payments to convicted child predators.”
NEW: Sen. Richard Blumenthal (D-CT) offered amendment to block Trump’s newly-established $1.776 billion taxpayer-funded pot of money from "making any payments to convicted child predators"
— Scott MacFarlane (@MacFarlaneNews) May 19, 2026
Multiple pardoned Jan 6 rioters have been accused of child abuse
Amendment was blocked
Republicans blocked it, opening the way for your local racist pedophile to receive a government check for a million dollars of your money in the mail. There’s a microscopic silver lining in that many of these predators are already back behind bars for their sick acts against children, but they can know that when they’re released, they have an easy life waiting for them.
This has to be the low point for America, right? Is there anything more disgusting that the Trump administration could possibly do at this point? Sadly, the answer is probably yes, but we’re not exactly eager to find out what that is.
