And that’s your lot. Goals, goals, goals, goals, goals, goals, goals for Ireland, as Robbie Keane becomes the 14th-highest international scorer of all time, level with Didier Drogba. Quite the milestone, obviously. Ta ra, goodnight and enjoy yourselves.
Full-time: Ireland 7-0 Gibraltar
And that is that. While they weren’t as ruthless as they could’ve been, a 7-0 win for Ireland is perfectly satisfactory. The Irish may well have been saving themselves for the trip to Germany on Tuesday too.
90 mins + 1: Brady swings a corner over and Robba dashes out and waves at it, the ball basically lands on Murphy’s head but he can’t direct the header at goal.
90 mins: Two minutes of added time. Can Ireland spare their blushes?
89 mins: Almost more slapstick from Gibraltar - a long ball is directed into the box, Chipolina chests it back to where he thinks his keeper is, but he was actually on the other side of the goal and it takes a fair scramble from Robba to get there and keep his own personal clean sheet intact.
87 mins: Ireland go close again. McGeady counters at some pace then feeds Brady on the left, he pauses for a moment then clips a cross over which finds McGeady, who had continued his run, but the header is saved.
85 mins: Gibraltar go close to scoring twice - Lee Casciaro finds Guilling with a raking pass, and his effort is blocked behind. From the subsequent corner Brian Perez gets up at the near post with a relatively free header, but misses the ball. Almost any contact there and it would’ve been a goal.
84 mins: McGeady lopes down the right and tries a cross, but Chipolina gets a good block in. Not that they really need any further goals, but they continue to be wasteful in the latter part of this game.
81 mins: Doyle almost manages to get himself involved in the world’s most pointless fight, after being barged in the back by Joseph Chipolina. Brady is then lucky not to be booked after taking a dive on the left. Dear lord, that would be ludicrous.
80 mins: The shoddy continues - Murphy has a relatively free header from a corner, but mistimes his jump and heads wide.
78 mins: Ireland, it must be said, have been pretty shoddy in the last ten minutes or so. Brady has a chance to set McClean away with a simple pass, but under no pressure he overhits it and it goes out for a goal-kick. Poor, that.
77 mins: O’Shea has to do some defending, doing well to head away a pass that if left unattended would’ve seen Guilling free on goal.
76 mins: Ireland’s record win is 8-0 over Malta, back in 1983. BUCK YOUR IDEAS UP THIS INSTANT IRELAND.
74 mins: Murphy is penalised for a push, which in the circumstances must be the most pointless act of all time.
73 mins: Ireland should be forced to only use their non-dominant foot for the rest of the game. Forde only allowed to use his torso to stop shots.
71 mins: If you’ve got a gameplan, stick to it...
gibraltar 7-0 down, still determined to play a pretty high line pic.twitter.com/5OCcAjTwTf
— Ken Early (@kenearlys) October 11, 2014
69 mins: Final change for Ireland - Robbie Brady replaces Ward at left-back. Good. They could do with a bit of extra attacking thrust.
68 mins: Lee Casciaro nearly makes a monkey out of O’Shea, nipping in behind the Sunderland defender but Forde is alert and dashes out to nip any potential embarrassment in the bud.
67 mins: McClean aims a long pass from the touchline into the box, but Doyle can’t quite gets his head to it.
65 mins: How many are Germany going to score against Gibraltar? This guy is regretting his retirement...
64 mins: And Doyle almost scores with his first touch, beating new goalie Robba to the ball from a corner, but heading the thing just wide.
63 mins: Double sub by Ireland - Kean’s legs are saved, replaced by Daryl Murphy, while Hoolahan goes off, with Kevin Doyle on in his stead.
61 mins: A save! Forde makes a save! The corner comes over and Payas rises at the far post, bullets a header at goal and Forde tips it over, possibly via his forehead.
60 mins: A corner for Gibraltar! Lee Casciaro chases one back with Wilson, gives him a bit of a shove and the Stoke made hoofs it out. Perez goes off, replaced by Jamie Robba and gets a standing ovation. Now that’s patronising.
59 mins: A notable event as Ireland take a shot without scoring - McGeady opens his body out and shoots from the edge of the box, but Perez (who is about to be subbed off) saves.
58 mins: Sub for Gibraltar - Roy Chipolina is off, and the splendidly-named Yogen Santos comes on.
56 mins: Keane’s there again, advancing on goal and feeds Hoolahan, skips around one defender, strolls into the six yard box and in the manner of a 14-year-old playing in an Under-9s game, walks to within about three yards of the keeper before slotting it in.
GOAL! Ireland 7-0 Gibraltar (Hoolahan 56)
Officially embarrassing now.
54 mins: Haven’t even had a chance to tell you that Gibraltar made a change at the break - Robert Guilling has replaced Rafael Bado.
If they're going to keep playing the music after every goal they might as well leave it on
— Dion Fanning (@dionfanning) October 11, 2014
53 mins: McClean cuts inside from the left, slips a pass to Keane who opens his body and shoots but it’s saved by the busy Perez, but straight into the path of McClean who swoops in between three defenders to force it home.
GOAL! Ireland 6-0 Gibraltar (McClean 53)
“It’s a rout,” declare the commentators.
51 mins: Unfortunate stuff from Perez. Keane gets clear on goal but the keeper paws away a weak chip, Hoolahan follows up but his shot is cleared off the line by Wiseman, but it hits the Gibraltar keeper and goes in.
GOAL! Ireland 5-0 Gibraltar (Perez OG 51)
Oh, now that’s a shame.
49 mins: GOA...oh, no, it’s offside. Gibson whips in a free-kick from the left corner of the box, it skips off Chipolina’s head and into the net, but the flag goes up because O’Shea was in an offside position. Perhaps that should’ve been allowed to stand, as O’Shea didn’t get a touch, but one imagines it won’t be terribly costly.
46 mins: Well, that was rapid. Keane gets through on goal, and slips it past the keeper to McClean, who stretches to stab the ball home. Gibraltar claim offside, but it wasn’t and the goal stands.
GOAL! Ireland 4-0 Gibraltar (McClean 46)
Before I could even tell you the second half had started!
Updated
Half-time: Ireland 3-0 Gibraltar
And that’s the break. Ireland have, just about, on balance, all things considered, been the better team. It’s 3-0 and could have been double that by the half hour mark, but a combination of Gibraltar tightening up a little and probably the inevitable complacency means there hasn’t been any further scoring. One imagines that will change after the break, though.
44 mins: Ireland are knocking it around midfield now, just because they can. Score some more goals Ireland! Don’t do this for the rest of the game! Think of your public!
42 mins:
Gibraltar fans just started singing 'let's pretend we scored a goal'. Bless 'em
— Alan Smith (@alansmith90) October 11, 2014
41 mins: Ward gets down the left and tries a cross, but it’s headed away by the first man. No goals since the 19th minute - what gives, Ireland?
38 mins: Well, they’re absolutely terrible - would it not be more patronising to pretend otherwise?
@NickMiller79 Are you actually trying to be patronising and rude about #Gibraltar on the Guardian live blog?
— Ian Bonham (@bon_the_one) October 11, 2014
36 mins: Minor japes from McGeady who loses a tussle with Casciaro (Ryan) on the left, the ball having gone out of play, and then gives his adversary a playful boot up the arse.
35 mins: Another good save by Perez - Hoolahan slips McGeady through on the left side of the box, who spanks a shot towards goal but the keeper throws up his left hand and diverts it wide.
34 mins: Oooof, that was close. McClean cuts in from the right, then runs into Hoolahan who solves a potential mix-up by simply pushing his teammate out of the way and taking the ball off him. The Norwich man advances on goal and fires in a low left-footed shot, but it skims wide of the post.
Updated
33 mins: McGeady cuts inside from the left and tries an ambitious shot aiming for the near post. Even with a goalie as bad as Perez, it would’ve been a particularly shambolic effort to let that one in.
31 mins: A Gibraltar attack! Well, after a fashion. Lee Casciaro tries to run through the Ireland defence, but after some minor dithering John O’Shea snuffs the danger out.
30 mins: Don’t laugh, but Gibraltar have actually got back into things a tiny bit in the last few minutes. Well, perhaps not ‘got back into it’, but they’re looking a little more solid, pressing with greater urgency and not quite as open and terrible at the back. Scott Wiseman and Ryan Casciaro have swapped positions (right-back and centre-back), which might have something to do with it.
27 mins: When a team is this bad, it’s difficult to tell if fouls come about through rank cynicism or just good old fashioned incompetence. Ryan Casciaro treads that fine line by taking out McClean with a beefy block.
Updated
25 mins: More danger from McClean, who whips over a cross from the left looking for Keane, but the striker can’t quite reach the ball and to further compound his no doubt utterly abject misery, slides into Perez to give away a free-kick.
Updated
24 mins: McClean yomps down the right and fires over a low cross, but Perez palms it out before Roy Chipolina gets there just before Keane to clear.
Updated
22 mins: Walker attempts to nab an impromptu piggyback from McGeady. The referee, having carefully consulted the rules, decides this is not allowed.
Ali Daei holds the record for international goals at 109. Robbie Keane now on 65 - can he break the record tonight?
— Sean Fay (@Sean_Fay) October 11, 2014
20 mins: Keane is now the leading goalscorer in European Championship qualifiers, apparently. With that penalty he has overtaken Hakan Sükur. Knowledge.
19 mins: Forde eventually touches the ball with his hands, catching a shot from miles, miles out as Gibraltar try to catch the Millwall goalie out. They do not.
GOAL! Ireland 3-0 Gibraltar (Keane 18)
Obviously, he slots it away. Take that, Didier Drogba.
Updated
PENALTY TO IRELAND!
How bizarre. A long punt finds Keane behind the defence, he takes it round Perez but the shot is cleared off the line. Perez then forgets he’s allowed to use his hands, allowing Hoolahan to nip in and be fouled by the goalie.
16 mins: That’s 64 international goals for Keane there, if you’re keeping track.
14 mins: Easy as pie for Keane, who runs onto a through ball, waits for Perez to commit himself which the keeper does embarrassingly early, then simply rolls it so gently past him that it almost stops before it reaches the net.
GOAL! Ireland 2-0 Gibraltar (Keane 14)
And he’s just one away from that lofty title!
13 mins: A milestone and no mistake for Keane ahead...
A hat-trick for Robbie tonight would tie him with Didier Drogba as the 14th highest scoring international of all time.
— Off The Ball (@offtheball) October 11, 2014
He always dreamed, etc and so on.
12 mins: David Forde gets his first touch, controlling a backpass then passing out to Meyler at right-back. He probably needs something to hold his attention for most of this game, mind. Anyone know if there are any new books out?
10 mins: Shout for a penalty for Ireland - Hoolahan takes a shot from about 15 yards out, and while it does hit Chipolina on the arm, the defender was facing the other way at the time, so that would’ve been deeply harsh.
9 mins: Brilliant save from Perez. Keane brings the ball down neatly in the box and squares to McClean, who can’t quite control it properly but it falls to him to take a volleyed shot. It’s close to the Gibraltar keeper, but hit with some force, and Perez beats it confidently clear.
Updated
8 mins: Intimidating atmosphere at the Aviva...
aviva, one minute to kick off. waving a flag with the name of soft drink sponsors & the word "YES". welcome to hell pic.twitter.com/oGIjnqz0C0
— Ken Early (@kenearlys) October 11, 2014
6 mins: A poor kick out by Perez is picked up by Hoolahan, who plays an absolutely delicious pass through the defence with the outside of his left foot, putting McGeady clear, and the Everton man squares to Keane who neatly tucks the ball into the back of the net. Just what they needed.
GOAL! Ireland 1-0 Gibraltar (Keane 6)
Well that’s pretty ruthless.
Updated
4 mins: First real chance for Ireland, and there’s some neat work on the left by Ward, McClean and McGeady, with the latter clipping a cross to the far post, where Wes Hoolahan gets his head to it, but loops a poor effort over the bar.
Updated
2 mins: Ward is the first to try an attack for Ireland, lolloping down the left and skimming over a cross, but Perez gets a somewhat unconvincing punch away.
1 mins: And we’re away. All Ireland so far. Admittedly, as this is typed, only 21 seconds have elapsed.
Robbie Keane (135) has played more international matches than the entire Gibraltar squad (74).
— Ryan Keaney (@RyanKeaney) October 11, 2014
Gibraltar’s national anthem gets a good airing, and jaunty wee number it is too. Good choice not to go with their official anthem, which is of course ‘God Save The Queen.’ There are actually a few more fans inside the Aviva stadium than one might have anticipated, although a distance from being full - perhaps this is secretly a huge deal in Dublin.
J.R in Illinois poses a question: “Which do you think will be bigger, Ireland’s margin of victory today or their margin of defeat against Germany on Tuesday?
“I’m going with margin of victory today. Although I don’t think Ireland has it in them to put in a performance against Germany like Scotland did last month I think they can probably keep the score against Germany a little better than 1-6, which happened exactly two years ago tomorrow.”
In the interests of being contrary, I don’t reckon either will be particularly high-scoring. I reckon 3-0 to the Irish today, 3-1 to Germany in the week.
Here’s what Conrad Leach had to say about this game in the 10 things to look out for in the international action:
After their disappointing efforts in qualifying for this summer’s World Cup, the Republic are ready to make amends and reach France 2016. They finished fourth in their group for Brazil, six points behind Sweden, who finished second. Things looked bleak. But if one result can breed optimism, then maybe Ireland’s 2-1 win in Georgia last month is it. Add to that the enlarged format for Euro 2016, and they have a very good chance of reaching a second consecutive European Championship finals. Roy Keane, the Republic’s assistant manager, naturally expects this group to be dominated by Germany, who the Republic play on Tuesday in Gelsenkirchen, and second place to be disputed by his side, Scotland and Poland. Thanks to that last-minute win in Tbilisi, secured by Aiden McGeady, Ireland have given themselves a good start and will have little to fear on Saturday against Gibraltar, who lost 7-0 last month against Poland. Keane, who has been in the news this week with his combative second autobiography, will expect the Republic to be similarly feisty in Dublin.
There is nowhere those half-and-half scarves will not go...
Probably shouldn't read too much into warm-up drills, but even the first touch of some Gibraltarians looks a little, er, dodgy.
— Alan Smith (@alansmith90) October 11, 2014
Go on then...
We can confirm #RIPtheBeard! Roy has decided to shave the night before our first home qualifier! #makethematch pic.twitter.com/2BQQMI7zIM
— FAI (@FAIreland) October 10, 2014
Still, at least they could pick their side via conventional channels. Gibraltar don’t quite have that luxury, as Alan Smith’s match preview details:
Those problems, though, appear minor compared with the shortage of options available to the Gibraltar head coach, Allen Bula. They were so desperate for experienced players a call was made to bring the Oldham Athletic manager, Lee Johnson, out of retirement. The 33-year-old, who stopped playing 18 months ago, politely turned down the chance to join the squad – despite his grandmother being a “full Gibraltarian”.
Bula had named his squad for the Ireland game and Tuesday’s match with Georgia early so players could organise time off with their employers. There are three British-based members of the 20-strong party – the Preston North End defender Scott Wiseman, Bristol Rovers’ Jake Gosling and Adam Priestley, a striker with Farsley in the Evo-Stik First Division North.
From the look of their official teamsheet, it seems David Meyler will fill-in as Ireland’s emergency right-back, with Wes Hoolahan partnering Robbie Keane up top. While it doesn’t necessarily follow that more strikers = more attacking = more goals, it does seem slightly odd that O’Neill and Keane have only selected one specialist striker for this game, which is likely to be an exercise in shooting practice. Perhaps the rationale is that they will need players to pick apart the massed ranks of the Gibraltar defence, rather than ones to stand around up front.
Mr and Mrs Casciaro, and presumably Mr and Mrs Chipolina, are going to be very proud.
Team news
Ireland
Forde; Meyler, O’Shea, Wilson, Ward; Hendrick, Gibson, McGeady, McClean; Hoolahan, Keane. Subs: Elliott, Westwood, Clark, Whelan, Long, Pilkington, Stokes, Brady, Quinn, Walters, Murphy, Doyle.
Gibraltar
Jordan Perez; Wiseman, Ryan Casciaro, Roy Chipolina, Joseph Chipolina; Payas; Brian Perez, Bado, Walker, Gosling; Lee Casciaro. Subs: Coleling, Robba, Artell, Kyle Casciaro, Lopez, Sergeant, Priestley, Boalo, Santos, Garcia, Hernandez, Guilling.
Updated
You might not have realised, given that it’s been tucked neatly away in the Irish football coverage this week, but as a sideshow/supporting act to Roy Keane’s book launch/beard removal, is a football match. It’s perhaps a little bit odd that Keane was allowed to flog his tome on FAI time, given that he’s supposed to be whipping the Irish troops into shape for this Euro 2016 qualifier, but then again, it is ‘only’ Gibraltar.
The Gibraltarians of course took something of a hiding in their opening game, against Poland, who stuck seven past them, but Ireland have tended to struggle when it comes to scoring hatfuls against the minnows of European football, as Martin O’Neill admitted this week. “Traditionally, we are not phenomenal goalscorers, so we have to be creating chances in the game because we will miss one or two,” he said, in a brief moment when every microphone in Dublin wasn’t trained on Keano.
It might matter this time, mind. While UEFA’s redrawing of the European Championships is bad news for those of us who thought a 16-team competition was, like Baby Bear’s porridge, just right, it’s smashing news for sides like Ireland who have struggled to make it to tournaments in recent years. However, Ireland have been unlucky enough to be thrown into a group featuring a fair few teams who might hope to nab that bonus second place, assuming Germany sashay their way to top spot, with Scotland and Poland also with their beady eyes on automatic qualification. With the Poles having already filled their boots against the little guys, goal difference might well be a factor if it’s a close run thing, even taking into account that head-to-head record is the first deciding factor should teams finish level on points.
They shouldn’t be too nervous if they don’t get off to a storming start, though. It was only 1-0 to Poland at half-time of their game, before the superior fitness that one would expect of an entirely full-time outfit told and Robert Lewandowski and chums had a lovely old time, bashing in six in the second 45.
So what of Gibraltar? Well, they have actually won a game, beating Malta in what experts were not calling the world’s finest rhyming encounter in the summer, the only goal coming from Kyle Casciaro. Of course you’ll want to know, as everyone does in these situations, what Casciaro does for a living - he’s a shipping agent, apparently. If you absolutely insist on seeing this list of proper jobs that the Gibraltarians do, then here it is...
**BET OF THE DAY** Republic of Ireland @ 3/1 from 1/50 to beat Gibraltar! HERE -> http://t.co/QYBfToX8FI pic.twitter.com/i1mB7bcImI
— Oddschanger (@Oddschanger) October 11, 2014
Nick will be here shortly.
