Preamble: Hello there and welcome to the big game of the day (quiet at the back, England fans), as Ireland and France meet in the first leg of what promises to be a rather tense 180 minutes of play-off football. After all the discussion of Ireland being undone by the late seeding of the play-off draw, they could have drawn far worse than the underperforming French and their "eccentric" and unpopular manager.
It's not just me whose confident about Ireland's chances (though of course, that would be enough) but the team themselves, who have been talking themselves up this week. "If [France] were as good as everyone seems to think, they would have won their group," says Richard Dunne, neglecting to mention that no one actually thinks they are any good.
One thing, can anyone help me out on this? It is seen as common sense that playing at home first over two legs is a disadvantage. Is there any evidence to back this up? Do we have statistics, people? I've just read Freakanomics you see (yes, I'm three years too late), so I am treating received wisdom like this with a raised eyebrow.
I don't want to drop a name but ... I've just got an email from the brother of one of tonight's key players. "Hey Josh," writes Liam Given (YES! That Given). "Imagine my surprise when my fiancé said that for my 40th birthday treat she had organised a 'surprise' party the same night as the Rep of Ireland v France game here in Belfast. And that because people were 'flying in' etc I had no choice but to be there. Ungrateful of me? Perhaps. But when you appreciate my birthday isn't until Monday AND – more pertinently - I'm Shay Given's oldest brother and never miss a game it does add a glumness to proceedings. Enjoy the game!" You poor blighter, Liam. But at least you don't have to work on a Saturday night like your brother.
Do we have any other reletives of tonight's teams out there? It is not an exact science but based purely on reletives reading this report I am predicting tonight's score to be 1-0 to Ireland (Thierry Henry's uncle is yet to email me).
It's a long shot, but can we get a full team of footballer's retives by the end of this match?
The teams
Republic of Ireland: Given, O'Shea, St. Ledger, Dunne, Kilbane, Lawrence, Whelan, Andrews, Duff, Doyle, Keane. Subs: Joe Murphy,
McGeady, McShane, Kelly, Gibson, Hunt, Best.
France: Lloris, Sagna, Gallas, Abidal, Evra, Lassana Diarra,
Alou Diarra, Gourcuff, Anelka, Gignac, Henry. Subs: Mandanda,
Escude, Govou, Benzema, Sissoko, Malouda, Squillaci.
Referee: Felix Brych (Germany)
Looks like Liam's brother won't be his big birthday surprise then ...
Sky's build up is trying to stay away from any Irish stereotypes. I am currently watching a montage set to U2 played on a harp. I am not joking.
My colleague Evan Fanning, who is far more Irish than I will ever be (although I do really, really love Father Ted), has sent this to me as means of inspiration: Irish motivational video. My goosebumps are pending.
"When you call this game the Big Game of the Day, don't you mean of the
games being played by teams from the British Isles?" asks James Wells. "Wouldn't Egypt v Algeria be the Big Game of the Day, since it actually decides who's in, plus is being contested by bitter rivals? And just won by Egypt in the 95th minute." I judge the size of games purely on which I am doing the minute-by-minute on, James, I am very shallow.
The players are about to come out at Croke Park, it is all look very green in the stands. And on the pitch, obviously.
The mayor of Dublin is just meeting the teams. She is wearing a hat she will want to forget in years to come, a touch too much of the Mick Fleetwood to it.
And we're away ... Here we go then, the Irish have a good old huddle and then kick off from right to left. Knocked back to Kilbane for a long clearance.
1 min: A couple of strong tackles early on from the Irish get huge cheers from the home fans. It sounds like a great atmosphere, the French getting booed in possession etc.
3 min: France look calm and patient on the ball, as you would expect. Ireland seem a bit more frantic.
4 min: a long free-kick from the back takes a bounce on its way through to Lloris and for a moment it looks like Keane will get to it, but it is not to be. At the other end France earn the first corner but it is safely claimed by Given.
6 min: Keane tries to bring Doyle through on goal with a back-heeled flick but Gallas just gets there, any sign of an Irish chance and Croke Park is losing it.
7 min: What ever happened to Damian Duff being able to turn a corner? Twice he has got the ball with his back to goal but huge space to turn, but just not bothered.
9 min: Ireland are looking neat and tidy, nothing to report so far in terms of actual incidents though.
11 min: Ball over the top from Abidal and Dunne lets it bounce over his head and into the path of Gignac. He runs on to it and strikes it over Given and into the net. Luckily for Dunne, the offside flag is raised, correctly.
13 min: Doyle finds some space on the right of the area and gets the ball across, low and hard but straight into the hands of Lloris.
15 min: Glenn Whelan slides into tackle Diarra and Henry in quick succession. Those tackles, and Whelan's performance so far, can be described as whole-hearted.
17 min: Duff cuts in from the left and scuffs a shot tamely wide of the near post from about 25 yards. At the other end Gignac, bumbles to the touchline, somehow never in control of the ball and earns a corner. Duff clears the corner with a huge hoof into touch.
19 min: "Tell me, why do France always look so excellent in their kits?" asks Simon Frank. "Has there ever been a crap French kit? It's the same across the sports - they always have the best clobber." It's because the French are much more stylish than us as a nation, we learn that in school, Simon.
21 min: It's all got a bit scrappy here, Sagna has now gone down with a huge scream that I could hear in Kings Cross (admittedly through my headphones). Doyle puts the ball out, then it turns out Sagna is fine. Oh.
23 min: Anelka nips the ball past Andrews and lures him in to bringing him down on the right corner of the penalty area. Henry floats the ball into the box and it is headed clear by O'Shea as it curls dangerously across the box.
25 min: Gourcuff brings Andrews as they fight for a header, but the free-kick doesn't even reach the box before Doyle is penalised for pushing. "What's with France's shirts? They look like modern spray-on rugby shirts not football shirts. Has the recession led to bulk buying of all national sports kits in France?" asks Robin Hazlehurst, proving style is in the eye of the beholder.
28 min: Gah! Should have been 1-0 to Ireland. Liam Lawrence, hang your head in shame. A long ball from the back skips over Doyle and into the path of Keane, he chests it down and gets a shot away at Lloris. It is saved but rebounds into the path of Lawrence who has more or less AN OPEN GOAL but puts it wide of the right-hand post. What a chance.
30 min: Oh, wait. Liam Lawrence, I apologise. Patrice Evra managed to get across and get the slightest of touches on his shot to send it wide. The fact a goal kick was given shows I wasn't the only one tricked. Keane lays the ball off to Andrews 25 yards out but his curled shot trickles wide of the right post.
32 min: The French don't like long balls from the back, they look panicked everytime one comes up from Given or Dunne. It is like Jack Charlton never left.
35 min: Ireland need to be careful not to commit too many men forward here, whenever an attack breaks down France are breaking fast through that front four. Obviously, I realise Trapattoni will probably already have told them this.
38 min: Liam Lawrence looks confident that he can skip down the wing like Stanley Matthews everytime he gets the ball. He can't. Whelan and Andrews dilly dally on the edge of their own area and Henry ends up with the chance to put a shot wide. That could have been a disasterous way to concede.
41 min: Another long ball, another defensive panic from the French. The ball worked out to Lawrence who earns a corner. It comes to nothing but the message is clear. Route one, Ireland. Route one!
43 min: Diarra almost finds Anelka in the box but it is scrambled clear. Neither defence is looking particularly comfortable if we are honest.
Peeeeeeep: Half-time. Ireland have nothing to fear here, they look far the more threatening of the two teams, due to France's defensive frailties more than anything. Right, cup of tea and then I'll have a look at some emails, mainly about the French kit by the look of things.
Football kits and style, an examination through the medium of email
"Simon Franks thinks France's is a good kit? It looks like they've either got bra's on or there's been tomfoolery in the dressing room with black duct tape," says Michael Ollier.
"The black cross on the back of the France kit makes the French players look like they're wearing a BabyBjörn," observes Damien Neva.
"I don't buy your stylish nation reasoning - last time I was in France (this summer) all I saw was a load of dorks walking around with hands slotted into their too-tight ironed jeans, lame v-necks and the like," replies Simon Franks, furthering European relations. I have never been to France, so I couldn't possibly tell you.
Anyway, enough chat, the teams are back on the pitch. Bit of Thin Lizzy being piped through Croke Park while we wait for the restart.
We're away ... France kick off, shooting from the right.
46 min: France almost break through straight away, working the ball out to Sagna on the right and his ball skips across the area but can't find a man in blue. So, would 0-0 be any good for Ireland, or do they need to take a lead to France? Discuss.
48 min: Whelan attempts to play Keane through but he is a good yard or two beyond the high French back line. I have the distracting image of Brian May and Roger Taylor on the X Factor on a screen in the corner of my eye. Is there no low those two won't stoop to?
50 min: Lovely stuff by Duff, I take it all back from earlier. Takes Sagna out the game with a back-heeled nutmeg, earning himself a corner for his worries. From the corner Dunne is found unmarked and he heads it down into the danger area, however as the ball pinballs around and Keane fails with an overhead kick the flag is rased for offisde. A good chance.
53 min: Diarra takes out Kilbane as Ireland break. Excellent refereeing tonight, by the way, no need to cards to control a high-pressure match.
55 min: Lassana Diara almost opens the scoring from nowhere, chesting the ball down 30 yards out and sending a shot screaming past the right post by a few inches.
57 min: "Ireland need to score," writes Sean O'Conghaile. "We pat ourselves too much on the back for 0-0's like the one against England at Wembley and against France in Paris. We could and should have won those games and we got nada from it all at the end of the day as we did not qualify."
58 min: Sagna's cross is blocked by Duff and it spins behind for a corner. I could see France getting a goal in this second half if Ireland don't perk up. Not from that corner though, terrible, squared to Diarra about 30 yards out and the move just breaks down into a midfield battle.
60 min: Still all france, I can't remember the last time Ireland had possession. Henry plops the ball up to Gignac to lob a header over Given. he's offside and Given tips it over, so not a goal on two counts.
62 min: Duff finds space to cross from the right but Lloris strides from his goalline to claim the ball confidently.
64 min: Is it me or does Thierry Henry take a bad corner? Another one comes to nothing. "Sean O'Conghaile may be right about needing to score, but the 0 by France really counts for Ireland here," writes robin Hazlehurst. "If that remains then the away goals rule will seriously put the pressure on in Paris. And didn't Scotland even win there once recently? Incidentally, what are Ireland like at penalties...?"
66 min: In the last 10 minutes France have had 74% of possession. Trapattoni looks pensive and a little shouty on the touchline.
67 min: Huge cheers as Henry sends a shot high and wide from distance.
69 min: Oooooooooohhhhh. Evra bursts onto a ball into the area and Given dives for it at his feet. Evra gets there first knocks the ball clear of Given and throws himself over the goalkeepers hand. Huge appeals for a penalty but that was pretty cynical.
70 min: Leon Best replaces Kevin Doyle. My friend has just emailled me to say he went to see a long and boring German film today and the subtitles cut out with three minutes to go. Not really for public consumption, but it made me laugh.
GOAL! Republic of Ireland 0-1 France (Anelka 72 min) Diarra plays a pass in to Gourcuff with his back to goal and he lays it off to Anelka on the edge of the box. He tries his luck and his shot deflects off the boot of St Ledger, spins onto the right post and into the net. Given had no chance. It had been coming.
75 min: Lassana Diarra makes the most of a tussel with Whelan, making Ireland put the ball out of play. Suddenly he is fine.
76 min: Aiden McGeady replaces Damien Duff.
78 min: Keane almost gets on the end of a long ball but is muscled out by Abidal. France are just happy to keep possession of the ball now.
80 min: An incredible miss by gignac. Kilbane plays a backpass short of Given who comes out to block the ball away from Anelka, the ball comes to Gignac with the goalkeeper on the floor. He somehow, however, manages to scuff the ball so badly that it goes out for a throw in.
81 min: France have completely dominated this second half. 1-0 would is now looking like the best Ireland can hope for.
83 min: France break as an Irish attack comes to nothing but with four players against four Thierry Henry surrenders possession to Dunne.
85 min: Ireland just can't get hold of the ball. Aiden McGeady finally does but as he runs at the French backline he can only slice the ball wide.
87 min: A huge mistake by Abidal. He gives the ball away to keane in his own half, Keane lays it off to Abidal who plays in Keane in the box. The ball is laid off to Whelan but Lloris comes out to smother the ball. A great chance.
89 min: France just keeping the ball now, 1-0 will do them very nicely indeed.
90 min: Two minutes to be added on.
90 min: Most of those two minutes seem to be being spent for Gignac to leave the pitch and be replaced by Malouda.
Peep peeep peeeeeeeeep! That's it then. Or is it. Fisticuffs in the centre circle, all seems to surround Andrews and Gourcuff but then everyone gets involved. Much like Ireland's performance on the pitch it all fizzles out.
Oh well, it looks like Ireland will have to win in France then. There is hope, in the first half France were dodgy on any high balls at the back, if Ireland can reproduce that they have a chance. You know where to follow it minute-by-minute (here). But that's it for me, cheers for the emails. Bye!
