There's been a change in the team lineup for Christmas.
The reindeers have been dropped. North Pole sources say there's been rumours of dissent in the reindeer ranks.
Santa has had enough. He's made a big call. He's decided to recall a dinosaur to the team. Apparently it did quite well back in the Jurassic period.
If it wasn't for the extinction event, the reindeers may never have got a guernsey in the first place.
And don't be alarmed, Santa hasn't been dropped as captain. He's simply dressed as Armoured Batman. That's what we've been told, anyhow. Unless some kind of Christmas coup is afoot.
So the reindeers are out and Blue the dinosaur from Jurassic World is in.
And the heroes are here to save us from the pandemic. The scientists, that is, making those vaccines.
But also the mythical ones at Heroes and More at Wallsend.
The store has been holding Santa and superhero photos annually for the past four years to "help raise funds for charities and bring Christmas spirit to the local community," store owner Simon Wait said.
"Unfortunately, due to the COVID restrictions this year we are unable to hold the normal event. But it will still go ahead with a slight difference.
"Santa's sleigh will be set up with Blue the dinosaur from Jurassic World replacing the reindeers. Lots of other superheroes and characters will be on display in the Christmas setting."
The display will be set up throughout December and open for photos during trading hours.
It's a gold coin donation for a photo, with all proceeds going to local charity Fight for Connar.
Keg Tree
A beer keg Christmas tree has been erected outside the Chelmsford Hotel at Kurri Kurri.
The hotel, which is home to the world-renowned Mulletfest, posted a video of the tree on Facebook.
"Still some more to do, but we thought you'd like a preview," the hotel said, in a post.
In response, Dianne Aulich said: "I was wondering what you were doing scaling the kegs. Looks fabulous."
Non-viral Jokes
This from Elaine Richards, of Salt Ash: Two cows are standing next to each other in the field.
Daisy says to Dolly: "I was artificially inseminated this morning."
Dolly: "I don't believe you."
Daisy: "It's true. No bull."
This from Penny Green on Instagram: "Why is it hard to play cards in the jungle? Because there are too many cheetahs."
Why did the tyrannosaurus cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.
What's the best way to talk to a velociraptor? Long distance.
