Michael Jackson's having a party. Photograph: The Guardian/Dan Chung
Let's all go to Tokyo! Michael Jackson's having a big party there and for just £1,758, you can sit with him for 30 seconds. There is no elaboration on this arrangement, but let's imagine you can at least get a question in during your half-minute.
The best interviewers - Jeremy Paxman, Lynn Barber, June Sarpong - will tell you to steer clear of questions that can be answered with a simple "yes" or "no", but with Michael Jackson - and with almost two grand riding on it - it's also important to avoid answers like "that's just ignorant", "it's a magical feeling" and "Diana Ross".
I'd probably ask him why he hasn't killed himself. But what would you ask Michael? Is there one question that, when answered, would tell you something and everything about one of the world's most famous and ridiculous celebrities?
Anybody proposing the "Do you fancy renting a Disney film tonight?" question will be in BIG TROUBLE.
