In this tumultuous world in which we live today, we need to learn a few “peace skills” to make our lives bearable and livable. We are always talking about life skills that can make people successful and sharp. These “peace skills” can make a conducive atmosphere for us to live. Of course, a harmonious atmosphere is what we all yearn to have around us. One such skill is the art of letting go at the right time and place.
Another important skill we all need to learn, in my opinion, is not to have preconceived notions about anything. Having said that I also know how difficult a thing it can be!
To drop the burden of preconceived notions, we need to unlearn a few things, which again is a tough thing to do. Very early on, we start cramming our brains with ideas and opinions. These notions might have entered our mind from our family, parents, society or some of the books we might have read. We need to understand the fact that everything in life keeps changing and we just cannot stick to something only because that thought might have entered our brains years back!
I always thought ice-creams or chilled items were bad for a child having a cold or a running nose. I was terribly surprised when a GP in London told my four-year-old grandson with a cold to go ahead and have a popsicle. Later I found out that there is no scientific evidence to prove that an ice-cream or a popsicle can aggravate a cold! All my life I have been keeping my children away from ice-creams, at the slightest of sneezes. What an anti ice-cream villain I have turned out to be!
We tend to have preconceived notions about people too, which in the long run is rather dangerous. We hardly look at a person as an individual. Nationality, race, caste or gender come in our way of judging a person. If he is a Punjabi, we are sure to identify him with a “Bhalle Bhalle” dance (thanks to Bollywood for putting these thoughts in our brains!). Believe me, there are Punjabis who don’t dance at all!
There happens to be a whole truckload of preconceived notions that we all carry within ourselves, day in and day out. A poor kitten crossing the road is considered a bad omen. We can’t let our men cry come what may! Nor are our women considered capable of doing hard work like lifting heavy objects (well, people like Karnam Malleswari are exceptions, no doubt!).
These generalisations and preconceived notions turn us into stale beings who cannot see the reality of anything around us. That poorly dressed man could be a genius. It is not necessary for great men to be dressed elegantly every single day of their lives. The domestic help need not be frowned upon, the minute something is stolen or lost from the house. Remember, we never get to point the finger at dishonest politicians who keep looting us for their selfish needs!
As changes in life happen to be the only constant, we have to be careful not to judge a person by their past deeds too. If thief-turned-writer Valmiki could be appreciated for his Ramayana, who are we to judge anyone by their past history?
In this diverse world, let us accept our differences and realise that it is these differences that actually make the world all the more beautiful. Let us drop that preconceived baggage in our minds through the windows of love and start living a meaningful life.
Yardsticks are not the same and these yardsticks were implanted in our brains at a very young age. Let us throw them out .Yardsticks are not worth carrying along. Let no one tell you whether you are a success or a failure in life. For me, that young Tibetan girl cuddling a puppy in her hand and beaming like a jewel from that photograph above me is the most successful person in the world, if success is measured by the happiness of fleeting moments!
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