On Friday night at the Signal Iduna-Park, Jan Koller understood what Ronaldo had found out a few days before: partying with the wrong side can have awkward consequences. Nothing much of note had happened in the dreary 0-0 ineptitude-fest between mid-table Dortmund and relegation fighters Nürnberg. But after the final whistle, Koller stirred up the emotions when he went over to thank the Dortmund faithful for their support.
The Czech striker, who played for the Black and Yellows from 2001 to 2006, had been welcomed back like a long-lost son by the Borussia fans before kick-off. After 90 minutes, they called him over and "Dino", the 2.02m giant, happily obliged. He applauded back at them and took part in a Mexican wave. The travelling Nürnberg fans couldn't believe their eyes. Here was their striker, the man trusted to save the Franconians from the drop, fraternising with opposing supporters. It was all too much for them. Out came the middle fingers and 'off with your head' gestures; Koller was booed and jeered mercilessly. The 35-year-old realised his mistake and came back to the away section to apologise. By then, it was too late. Koller left the pitch under a barrage of hate and was overheard muttering "fucking Nürnberg fans" to himself in the tunnel.
Ironically, Koller had been the best man on the pitch in Dortmund. He had worked tirelessly, looked dangerous throughout and even cleared one ball off the line. "I don't understand it," he said later. "I'm very disappointed by their reaction. Everybody knows that I run my socks off for Nürnberg but I had to at least thank the Dortmund fans for their applause. Unfortunately, my attempt to apologise to the Nürnberg fans didn't register with them." The day after, he apologised again on the club's homepage: "I'm sorry if my actions were misinterpreted. I've had a successful time in Dortmund and was happy that the fans there still respect me." His massive frame really does belie a sensitive soul. He was very upset.
His team-mates rallied around him. "Jan does his utmost, we can't understand the fans," said the captain Tomas Galasek. Manager Thomas von Heesen backed him as well: "He's a very nice guy and fine human being, he didn't deserve this." Von Heesen knows his team will only stand a chance of avoiding the drop if Koller plays well for them. They're four points adrift of safety with three games to go. This Wednesday, they entertain Duisburg at home in a classic six-pointer: the Zebras are one point ahead of them in 16th place after beating the reliably meek Leverkusen 3-2 with a last-minute goal on Sunday. A public vendetta against his one in-form player is the last thing Von Heesen needs right now.
The fight against relegation is beginning to take its toll on the usually very composed man. Before the Dortmund match, he had rounded on journalists critical of his selection. There was a touch of Donald "the known unknowns" Rumsfeld about his attack. "That's populist loud-speaking," he thundered. "[You're well versed in] the art of not-knowing anything."
Nürnberg's troubles, it's fair to say, wouldn't only have taken the CIA by surprise. The cup winners of 2007 have assembled a squad good enough to finish in the right half of the table but they've played much worse than last season. Perhaps they are simply too good to stay up - full of skillful little players who seem ill-prepared for hoofing it up to the big-man in the fight for survival. The departure of Hans Meyer has had no discernible effect on the players. Club president Michael A Roth is, for once, blameless. All the pent-up anger needed an outlet and Koller's indiscretion made it easy to cast him as the main scapegoat. It'll be interesting to see whether the fans in the Easy Credit stadium will be smart enough to forgive their striker come crunch time on Wednesday night. Unsettling their greatest asset would be a much bigger own goal than Koller getting his loyalties mixed up for a couple of minutes.
Unfortunately, terrace idiots are thriving in the league this season. On Saturday, Bochum hooligans nearly killed a Bielefeld steward with blows and kicks to the head. Two suspects were arrested and will hopefully be sentenced to life in a small cell with Herbert Grönemeyer's "Bochum" on full volume on a never-ending loop.
Bayern's championship-winning 0-0 in Wolfsburg on Sunday was barely less tedious. Wolves did enough to win but Bayern somehow held out in a performance that was every bit as embarrassing as their 4-0 defeat in St Petersburg on Thursday, the only difference being that Wolfsburg didn't take any of their 347 chances.
Ottmar Hitzfeld's team looked distinctly uncomfortable after the final whistle but then remembered the protocol: Hitzfeld, Karl-Heinz Rummenigge and a couple of unlucky TV reporters were doused with Weißbier. This moderately funny ritual, you might call it the Bavarian version of a golden shower, couldn't quite mask the lingering disappointment of losing in the semi-final of "the loser's cup" (Franz Beckenbauer).
In Munich, policemen scrambled to close off the main streets in anticipation of revelling crowds. But no one turned up. The 21st title had been a formality a long time ago. No one could pretend otherwise. The Red and White faithful were no more in the mood to celebrate this success than a man who's filled out €70m-worth of lottery tickets and finds he has won his money back.
Results: Dortmund 0-0 Nürnberg, Stuttgart 4-1 Frankfurt, Hertha 3-1 Karlsruhe, Rostock 1-3 Hamburg, Schalke 1-1 Hannover, Bremen 2-0 Cottbus, Bielefeld 2-0 Bochum, Wolfsburg 0-0 Bayern, Duisburg 3-2 Leverkusen.
